The Misadventures of Althaia and Malaria: The Smashers Visit!
by Kawaii-Pinkberry
Summary: Two zany female cousins go on several misadventures when a freak accident happens that causes the Real World and the Realm of Fiction to crossover somehow and now the Smashers are stuck in The Real World! Will they ever be freed, or will they stay stuck in The Real World forevermore? Find out in this crazy fanfiction!
1. WHOA! What Is Goin' On!

Kawaii-Pinkberry: Okay guys, so I decided to do this on a whim since I got the idea yesterday. I'm using my original characters, so you've never heard of them.

Althaia- Appearance: Althaia has bright red hair, that is shaded with…purple. Her bangs are messy and curved to one side, and have long strands of hair on both sides of her face that flips inward. She has neck-length hair that curves outward, like pigtails with no ponytail holders. She has a pale skin-tone, from being in her "cave" too long. She has red and purple hybrid eyes, and two thick eyelashes. She has dark rims around her eyes from not getting enough sleep. Althaia wears a red and purple shawl that has a purple ribbon with a deep indigo-colored oval brooch in the center at the neck part tying it together. The base is purple, and the borders are frilled and red. She wears a red dress that has a lacy-black ribbon around the waist, and a black hoop at the end of her dress, leading to a black split in her dress. She wears shoulder-length fishnet gloves, purple and black-striped stockings, and red buckled shoes with deep purple padding. She wears a little red hat on the right side of her head with an oval indigo-colored brooch in the center that's identical to the one on her shawl, and transparent purple frills at the end of the hat. She's about five feet even in height, and about 83 pounds in weight.

Personality: Althaia is very mysterious, which can be summed up. She can be nice, but she'll snap on you in less then five seconds, and she is very sarcastic. She is suspicious of people, as she doesn't want them to rub off on her already maniac sister. She is very indecisive, but she is random just like her sister. At times, that is, having obviously WAY more control over her randomness than Malaria. Sometimes she gets pulled into random moments, just like her sister. She is conniving, and bears a more evil demeanor than her sister. Pretty much, Althaia is just mysterious. She is also a psychomaniac, and she gets very, very random too.

Malaria- Appearance: Malaria has dark blue hair that is shaded with black. She has flat bangs, and neck-length flat hair. She has long strands of hair that falls by the sides of her face. She has dark blue and black eyes, which are wider than her counterpart's because she actually sleeps. She is pale, like Althaia because she spends most of her time in her room playing video games. She wears a dress similar to Althaia's, but the base on the shirt part is a darkened shade of lavender-blue, and one part of the bottom base is blue, while the other is purple. She has the split in her skirt, but with a white hoop instead of a black one. She wears a blue cloak/cape that has a red diamond in the center. At the bottom of her cloak/cape are black endings. She wears black stockings, and white leather knee-length. She wears a blue little hat on the left side of her head that has a black ribbon and a red diamond on the center of the hat that's identical to the one on her cloak/cape.

Personality: Malaria is a crazy, insane, psychopathic maniac. She is very random, has a short temper, and she claims to be an evil freak. She isn't necessarily dim, but she tends to over-think things to the point where it barely makes sense, bearing a "mad scientist" demeanor. She can be influenced easily. She is VERY random, and will yell something that is just brainless. She is probably a tomboy, but it never can be decided because she's always acting so random. She is kind and talkative, but since she's so random, conversations don't last long with her. She is not in any way, shy or coy. She will burst out and tell a person she doesn't know a lot of stuff about herself. Either that or she'll just slash their coke in half with her sword. Malaria might be a pyromaniac as well, seeing as she seems like she would love to destroy things…or, actually, _buurrrn _things…

Yeah, so pretty much these girls find themselves stuck with the Smashers from a freak-accident that can probably never be repeated again as long as time itself is here…cliché, huh?…Yeah, basically, random stuff happens! Woo hoo! *goes crazy and pops a bag of popcorn* Okay, well enjoy this fanfiction! Woo hoohoo!

Malaria: So, Althaia, how should we type in this fanfiction?

Althaia: What are you talking about? 0_o

Malaria: Should we just talk using :, ( and this thing *? Or should we talk and make junk happen in detail?

Althaia: Well, in whatever you're talking about, I guess we should type in detail. We don't want to have a plot hole, right?

Malaria: Yeah, we don't. We only have 30 plot holes left in counting. But why should we type in detail? If we talk like this, there will be time for stuff to happen.

Althaia: Then why the flip did you ask me what type of formatting we should use if you wanted to use if you had a pre-determined answer?

Malaria: 'Cause I is awesome, and Microsoft Word can't deny it, baby!

Althaia: …Um…no comment. Can we meet the Smashers yet?

Malaria and Althaia: We do not own the SSB series, because if we did, it would suck, and Marth would be a princess, and Roy would be named Bob. Also, everything would be stupid, and junk, and we don't own Nintendo, and if we did, we'd be out of business because everything would suck. We, Malaria and Althaia belong to Kawaii-Pinkberry.

Malaria and Althaia: 0_o …

_

It was yet another RANDOM FREAKING DAY in Random Valley #1234. People where flying on parasols and riding on tires for transportation while some crazy people were fighting in the middle of the street! "No you little BEEP BEEPING BEEP BEEPER! I'll BEEPING destroy you, you worthless piece of BEEP!" yelled some random dude fighting some other random dude. Random Dude #2 started stomping and jumping. "BEEP BEEPING BO BEE BEEP BEEP! You BEEPING BEEP!" he then yelled and jumped Random Dude #1. They then began brawling for the umpteenth time that day. Some lady flying over the brawling two with her red-striped parasol then abruptly kicked them in the face on purposely. "SHUT THE FREAK UP, YA LOUD MOUTHS!" the lady then screamed as she swooped over them again, kicking them down to the ground, flying away. "OHHHHHHHH NO SHE DIDN'T!" the Random Dudes screamed as they began chasing the random lady on a parasol, while screaming some words that the author dare describe. Althaia sighed as she was peeking out of the window and watching the pointless fight. "Well, there goes my entertainment. Why can't they just fight in one place?" Althaia said. She then quickly realized that the fight was pretty boring. "You'd think they'd learn some actual insults besides going beep like robots." Malaria was playing Super Smash Brothers Melee, trying to beat three Level 9 CPUs, which were Marth, Young Link, and Peach, and Malaria was playing as Roy. "Maybe because AHHHHY GOOD LORD WHY MARTH!" Malaria screamed while holding both sides of her head. "Malaria, you've been doing the same match for HOURS. Why don't we watch TV instead?" Althaia said, obviously being annoyed. "NO TV! NO TV! NO. TV. AHH! UP B UP B UP B UP B UP B UP B UP B UP B UP BE UP NOOOOO!" Malaria screamed. "Alright, I've had just about enough of this "Roy gets pwn'd" marathon." Althaia said with her arms crossed. "I mean, gosh. Is nothing going to snap you out of this trance?" As if on cue, the infamous announcer yelled, "This game's winner is: Marth!" Malaria screamed to the top of her lungs, grabbing her hair and attempting to pull it out from its roots. "NO! NO! I WOULD'VE WON IF IT WEREN'T FOR THAT STUPID BOB-OMB! I HATE THIS GAME! DIE! DIE! DIE! YOU'D THINK I WOULD ACTUALLY BE GOOD AT THIS GAME AFTER 13 YEARS!" Malaria screamed, and threw the controller at the wall. Then, it bounded off the walls and flew back towards Althaia and Malaria, and they had to duck and cover. It knocked Malaria's comic books off the shelves, flew back at the two girls causing them to duck once again but much sloppier this time, and Malaria got slapped in the face with comic books "Ah-owh-oah-aye!" Malaria then said in pain as she got slapped with dozens of comic books. The controller then caught on fire from so much speed and peered through the door and in the living room. "After that MAAAD controller!" Malaria yelled and slid down the stair rails, and so did Althaia. The controller bounded off the walls and ceiling, knocking vases and all sorts of other precious items off the shelves. Eventually the controller peered down into the basement by some unnatural force just so the plot will go somewhere.

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…Silence.

Until WHAM! All of the lights and electronic devices and appliances were shut off immediately. Althaia and Malaria hugged each other tightly, being scared out of their minds. "Whadda FRAPPUCINO was that?!" Malaria said as her voice began shaking as she spoke. "I dunno, but something tells me that…" Althaia pondered as the two girls waited. And waited. And waited. WHOOSHKABOBO! The psycho-controller then burst through the basement door and Althaia and Malaria screamed for their dear lives as the controller busted more precious items. "Why won't that possessed controller DIEEE?!" Malaria screamed. Althaia then tackled Malaria, who was then about to be hit smack-dab in the head by the psycho controller. They both tumbled behind the couch temporarily being safe. The girls thought that controller would stop wreaking havoc on the already low-budgeted house. I mean, come on. They just wanted to keep their fancy-pants vases and stuff! Was that just too much to ask for?!

"Hey, just a second, author," Althaia continued and frowned, "It's not like this house is dirt-cheap. The vases aren't the only valuables in here. Now let's move on with the plot instead of drabbling!"

"So what's your plan? Whadda we do, huh? How're we gonna escape this psychomaniac controller?" Malaria said, glaring at Althaia who seemed to be under pressure.

Althaia looked up from behind the couch, still to see the controller flying about. She gawked as she ducked back down, seeing the controller pretty much almost coming face-to-face with her, panting as she did. "Okay, the simplest diversion I've come up with is to run back upstairs. I mean, we really don't want to get our heads chopped off by the unnatural force of this…controller." Althaia said then realized how stupid it was to be chased around by a controller. It's almost like the controller had a mind of its own. The girls came to a decision; run upstairs because for some odd reason, the controller started patrolling above the couch. Building up the courage, Althaia then flung herself up and made a mad dash. Stupidly, Malaria was too busy picking her nose (with her sword) to realize Althaia had even left yet. Althaia was halfway up the steps, and then noticed…there were no extra footsteps behind her. Althaia gasped, and saw Malaria still behind the couch, picking her nose. Althaia let out a growl in pure anger and shock at her sister's stupidity. She sighed, realizing that she had no choice but to go back for her. Althaia zipped down the stairs as fast as she could. While doing so, she realized how glad she was that she didn't wear a cape. Letting the thought go in 2.871 seconds, Althaia lunged behind the couch on her knees, skidding far enough just to slap Malaria in the back of her head, causing the blue-haired-Randomian to tilt her head downward, rubbing the back of her head immediately. 'Course, this would have been terrible on Malaria's part if she had still been picking her nose. "You little nitwit! What in Pyolisius are you doing?! Hadn't you noticed that I had taken off?!" Althaia said, now holding the girl's shoulders with both of her hands. "Eh…no." Malaria said which was not a surprise to the redheaded girl. "Ah, forget it! Let's go!" She then yelled, grabbing Malaria's arm, ensuring that she wouldn't get left behind. The controller was now pretty much flying after them. In a few short seconds, the girls where completely oblivious to this, now screaming like crazy as they were now pickin' up faster than before. It seemed like the steps were taking forever to get to, to Althaia who still was holding Malaria. She wanted to let her go, but she knew the girl was going to get distracted if so. As they reached the steps, Althaia eventually had no choice but to throw the girl up the steps. She did, with all her might and Malaria let out a shriek like a two-year-old in the dentist. Landing atop the stair at the very top, Malaria then redeemed her balance and partially her good little bit of consciousness (who thankfully had even that.) "Now don't dilly-dally! We've still got a mad controller on the loose!" Althaia informed the girl. Malaria immediately began to make her way to her and Althaia's game room. Althaia plunged up the steps as well, only so fast because the controller was hot on her trail. Althaia ran really fast trying to get into the room, and she did, even faster than Malaria. Althaia's screams, cries, and freakish speed caught the blue-haired-Randomian off guard and SMACK! Everything went blurry in the eyes of Malaria, who was mumbling some weird things. "World…colors...star...amai…amigos...huh…" Malaria fell unconscious from being hit with the speedy redheaded Gothian. And what would have severely ticked Malaria off if she was conscious, the control fell and stopped its rampage.

Althaia then groggily stood up and rubbed her head, then gawking in shock to see that Malaria was unconscious. Turning to face the Gamecube and the TV set, she noticed that there were colors flashing everywhere by it. She gawked, and then tilted her head in confusion. "What the…?"

_Five and a half minutes later_

"Malaria, please wake up. PLEASE, PLEASE _PLEASE_ wake up…" the redhead said as she kept shaking the blue-haired girl's unconscious body. Within a couple of seconds, Malaria blinked a few times, groaned and sat up groggily. "Oh, man…where is I?" Malaria muttered in confusion and rubbed her head. "Um…you fell unconscious, and…" Althaia closed her eyes and put her right hand to her heart and looked up. "Something is _totally_ wrong…" Malaria knew that Althaia was being serious, too. Althaia had no grin or fake play voice, either. Malaria was about to ask what was wrong, but when she stood up, it was all clear to her. Standing behind Althaia was…three swordsmen and a princess. One part of Malaria wanted to scream so loud the world exploded, and the other part wanted to hug them because she's a fangirl (which she's not) and Althaia could only turn around and closed her eyes. "How the helicopter did you all get in our game room?" Althaia said still with her eyes closed. "We dunno, you guys tell us." Marth replied in Japanese bluntly, and Malaria's eyes widened. 'WOOOOOOO!" Malaria screamed as loud as her voice would let her. "OHMIGOSH OHMIGOSH OHMIGOSH OMIGOSHOMIGHOSHOSGOSHHOSGOSH IT'S YOUNG LINK, ROY MARTH AND PEACH STANDING IN OUR GAME ROOM AND ITHINKINEEDTOCALMDOWNBEFOREIEXPLODEANDSTUFFGETSRATEDTV-14ANDTHENLIFEASWEKNOWITWILLCEASECEASECEASECEASECEASECEASECEASE-" "Malaria, get a grip. I've explained this to you 791 times now, but you are _not _a fangirl. Okay? You might drive them away!" Althaia exclaimed as she then pointed at Young Link, who was now already trying to get back into the TV frantically. Malaria blinked as she took a deep breath. "Yeah, okay, good point. Hai guys!" Malaria said as calmly as she could to the video game characters on the other side of the room. "Hi!" said Peach, and no reply from the three swordsmen. "And then you missed your chance with any of them liking you," Althaia said to Malaria, who was just too giddy about them being there. "Welcome to our game room, this is of course located in our house, which is located in Random Valley #1234, which is-yeah, you get it." Althaia said to them, who seemed completely unamused for a brief amount of time. Until, Roy said something in Japanese that translated in English, "Pleased to meetcha! I'm Roy!" he then attempted to shake hands with Althaia. "He's…mine…" whispered a raspy voice from a lone corner. "What, who said-"Young Link says as he was cut off from the raspy voice. "I SAID, HE'S MINE!" Malaria hissed like a snake, causing everyone to shriek. "No, Malaria. You aren't a fangirl. Cut it out!" Althaia said. Marth just facepalmed and started to realize that this place was probably as crazy as the Smash Brothers Mansion. "Oh, hey, Mr. Blue-Hair. Why is it that you're always notably irritable in fanfictions?" Malaria asked, tilting her head to the side. "Because I'm always surrounded by idiots." Marth actually replied to Malaria's question, which was breaking the fourth wall. "Guys, please don't start breakin' the walls. Ya know what happened last time, right?" Althaia said to the ditzy blue-haired Randomian. "No." she casually replied. Before Roy had time to say anything which followed up to the conversation, there was a loud "DANG IT! BEEP YOU, BEEPER! BEEP YOU AND YOUR ENTIRE FAMILY TO OBEEPLION!" the Random Dudes from earlier started up again. The entire group curiously peered out the oversized window that could easily be broken. There was the crazy lady riding on the parasol from earlier too, who was being chased by the Random Dudes. "Ahh, shut up ya low-life hooligans! Why don'tcha go live with ya mamas in da dumpsta?!" the lady started. Loud "WHOAS" and 'BEEPS" were yelled again, followed by some actual swearing words. "Heh, who does she think she is, Merry Poppins?" Roy joked and just received a blunt look from Marth and Althaia. All of a sudden, some fat dude rolled down the street on a tire, and screamed, "YEAH, I'M A RANDOM PEDESTRIAN!" Young Link scoffed. "Psst. No he's not. Pedestrians are people who travel by _foot_, idiot." Young Link showed major out-of-character-ness, getting an awkward glance from Peach. "Are you feeling okay, sweetie? You've been acting funny since some brute had us do that random match 145 times today." She said, becoming worried for Young Link. "Yeah, I'm fine! Lay off, will ya?" he then scowled Peach. "HUH!" chimed Malaria as she got a brilliant idea. "Who says just Smash Brothers characters can come here?! Let's try MARIO KART CHARACTERS!" she then popped Mario Kart Wii into her Nintendo Gamecube.

Her…_Nintendo Gamecube._

She received awkward glares from everyone except for Marth, who was too busy adjusting his tiara. "What? I was too lazy to hook up the Wii." Malaria said, shrugging.

To everyone's surprise, Mario Kart Wii had booted up perfectly. Malaria was now at the character selection screen and picked Daisy. "Yes, Daisy!" the tomboyish princess exclaimed excitedly as she clenched her hands together. In a flash, the screen turned black, and so did the entire room. "HEY HEY HEY, WHO TURNED OFF THE SUN?!" everyone yelled at the same time, even Marth and Roy yelled this in perfect English, although they talk Japanese. In moments later, the lights came back on and revealed a third redhead who I'm just gonna call a ginger for less confusion. The ginger was none other than Princess Daisy. "Hi I'm Daisy!" she exclaimed cheerfully while waving frantically. "We know that. How many freaking times are you gonna say that? We get it already!" Marth snapped at the ginger, who now scoffed in disbelief. "Well, _excuse_ me, princess!_"_ Daisy said with her arms crossed, turning her head. Roy began laughing hysterically, and so did Malaria. "I am NOT a princess," the blue-haired Altean then continued while adjusting his tiara, "I am a prince. Do you understand me, my dear Daisy?" "What prince wears a girly hairpiece like that?" Althaia said, chuckling. Marth was about to argue, but decided to leave it be, because it wasn't going to go anywhere. "Haha haha! 'Prince' ha ha ha!" laughed the redheaded pyromaniac at his counterpart. Malaria wiped a tear from her eye, done with her laughing fit. "Ah, man, y'all people crack me up, you know that?" Malaria said, beginning to laugh again, then snorted, laughing again. Peach, in fact didn't want to laugh at Marth, but tried her best to hold it back. Peach began to have a giggling fit, and Marth just shook his head. After about twenty minutes of them laughing, Marth fell asleep, eventually becoming bored now that everyone was too busy laughing to pay anything any attention. "I don't know about any of you guys, but it's too freaking HOT in here," Malaria started, fanning herself with her hands. Roy whistled innocently, trying to hide the cardboard box he had set on fire to its burning oblivion. "So, I'm just gonna go cool down. See y'all in a couple o' minutes," Malaria then got a head start, then jumped into a portrait of a snow man, with two other snowmen next to it, and a lot of baby penguins in the background. They were snowflakes falling opon the cool, cool snow. Labeled in small letters was "Cool, Cool Mountain" on the friendly painting. The remaining five (Marth not included because he was sleep) of the group was now shocked in astonishment of how one could jump into a magical painting. "Copyright infringement!" yelled an angry Princess Peach as she waved her fist. "Nope," replied Althaia. "We didn't put a disclaimer in here for nothing, buddy." "True, so true." Young Link said in boredom, looking at Roy set things random things on fire. Daisy was watching the fight outside through the window, and the fat guy who was riding the tire has now joined the four-way brawl. "Uh! You go Merry Poppins rip-off!" Daisy yelled and started doing random punching gestures. "Yeah! Give 'em the ol' one-two! Show 'em what's it for! Ooh, man, that's gotta hurt…" Daisy replied in shock, now looking disgusted but that faded in seconds.

A/N: Man, was that a blast! This was so fun to write and I'm still inspired; maybe I'll start working on chapter two while I still feel the fire!

Roy: Feel the fire…eh heh heh…

Riiiiiiight. Yeah, pyro? I don't think you should set stuff on fire here. Althaia and Malaria treasure pretty much everything in this house. Next thing you know, you'll get cussed out for burning a piece of lint.

Malaria: EEP! WHY IS MY LINT ON FIRE?!

Roy: *innocent whistle*

Young Link: Curses. Why did you even put me in this crazy fanfiction? I wanted to stay at home and torture Big-Me!

Because, you are one of my favorite Smashers. And besides, this would be totally boring without you. Right, Marth?

Marth: *snoring* *is asleep*

Peach: Wait…how'd we get in a writing office?! 0_o …Is that a pretty pink ring over there? Maybe-

Althaia: Why are we trolling the Author's Notes?

Daisy: Wait wait, lemme say something! I-

Well, onto the next chapter bye y'all! Please review this fanfiction!

Daisy: Wait, I-

BYE!

Daisy: H- *bread gets stuffed into her mouth* *chokes*


	2. Let The Randomness Begin

Kawaii-Pinkberry: Hai guys! Did you like my last chapter? I hope so, cuz I worked real hard on it! It was so fun! That chapter was funny and all, but this one will take all what is funny, mix it with hilarious, and then make-

Roy: (English Subtitles) Can we just get back to the fanfiction now? I wanna burn some more things!

Don't you think you've burned quite enough now? I mean, you burned the Author's Notes and I had to rewrite it again. And then you burned the disclaimer…

Roy: *innocent whistle*

Don't gimme that innocent whistle. I'm not a fangirl, so I won't give you that much mercy.

Marth: (English Subtitles) How long was I sleeping?

Roy: (English Subtitles) For at least three hours, I'd say.

Marth: (English Subtitles) Drat.

Malaria: HAHA! DRAT! LOL!

Althaia: What's so funny about saying drat?

Malaria: HAHAH OH YOU'RE TRYIN'A KILLS ME!

Althaia: ….

Young Link: The fat "pedestrian" has your sword, Roy!

Roy: (English Subtitles) DRAT! *runs off*

Nope, that won't be a sub-plot, people. Sorry. ;-;

Daisy: Haha!

I don't own ANYTHING from Nintendo, mmkay? Shortest Disclaimer ever, huh?

Peach: Writing a long disclaimer can be very tiring.

So why am I still writing this disclaimer, I don't know! Onward to the chapter!

Althaia sighed as she sat on the purple-colored bean-bag chair that sat in the corner in their din. She wasn't upstairs, because everyone was loud and obnoxious, except for Marth. Then again, he was too cranky for her likings. She awaited Malaria's return from the snowy world of Cool, Cool Mountains. She was still amazed at how there was obviously portraits of the snowy world in every room. She sat there, being really bored. Until, something _very_ interesting caught her eye. Marth and Roy came into the din, obviously not noticing Althaia in the corner. Her jaw almost completely dropped when opon closer examination of the two swordsmen, they appeared to be…holding hands. The two swordsmen now had a light shade of cherry-tinted blush on their faces. "Oh, Roy, you're so cute when you swing that sword of yours," the Altean prince spoke; now turning even redder. Roy blushed, rubbing the back of his head sheepishly. "You really think so?" the pyromaniac spoke. Marth nodded. They began talking about their feelings for about five minutes, and Althaia was just flabbergasted. The swordsmen now had a silence for about a half minute, and they were looking closely into each others eyes. They were now blushing in a deep cherry-tint, and their faces were just inches apart. "Roy, I…" Marth said, blushing like crazy.

"WHOA! HEY! WHOA! HEY! WHOA! HEY! AT! AT! AT!"

The swordsmen pulled away from each other as a record scratching noise echoed throughout the room. "C'mon guys. C'MON, GUYS! NO. GUY FLUFF. Malaria specifically said it!" Althaia exclaimed angrily. "So? She's not here, you immature little scum of the earth." Marth snapped at the redheaded Gothian. "If you guys don't stop being weird, then I will do something that will scar you guys permanently!" Althaia threatened. "Oh, _really?_" Marth remarked sarcastically. "Fine," Althaia started. "I tried to warn ya, but it seems like you crossed the line!"

Althaia turned away from the swordsmen.

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….

A silence filled the air, until Althaia slowly turned around, with her eyes closed. And as she slowly looked up, she said,

"_For those who I protect…I will not lose!"_

Althaia did an EXACT impression of Roy, and even said it in Japanese. Roy and Marth were frozen in silence.

"That was…disturbing." Marth said, sheepishly scratching the back of his head.

"Yes. Yes it was." Roy added.

"Now you see how we feel about guy fluff, right?"

"Yes."

"Let's never attempt that again, Roy."

"Great idea. Besides, it only made more people think you are a girl. Ha ha! Also, I never even liked you until this random chapter was born…"

"What?"

"Oh, nothing."

"Let's ALL forget that happened." Said Althaia.

"Yes. Now can you stop sounding like me already?"

"What do you mean?" Althaia was still unaware that she sounded like the redheaded general.

"You're STILL using my voice."

"…Drat."

Althaia facepalmed herself, and shook her head. _Why me, why me?_ She thought to herself. She then took away her hands and realized that she was wearing blue gauntlets. Gawking, Althaia realized that she didn't wear that shade of blue, or blue at all. Heck, she didn't wear gauntlets! She wore gothic attire. And looking in the mirror placed by her, she realized that she was adorned in Roy's attire, from his headband to his blue boots. "Again, why me!" she yelled aloud as she threw her arms into the air and looked at the ceiling. "Why are you dressed like me?" Roy asked just as anyone else being cosplayed would do. "I don't know…" Althaia said. And she quickly realized a fine sword was sheaved in a sheave she had tied to her waist; the sword was an exact replica of the Sword of Seals. "How did you get a replica of Roy's sword?" Marth asked curiously. "I don't…know." Althaia said, still staring at herself in the mirror in pure shock. "And how did you get _blue_ eyes?" Marth and Roy asked the redheaded…cosplayer. "I DON'T KNOW! STOP ASKING ME QUESTIONS I DON'T KNOW THE ANSWER TO!" Althaia snapped at the swordsmen, now breathing heavily. "My pyromania is flaring. I _need _to BURN STUFF UP!" Althaia yelled as Marth and Roy were scared out of their minds, and Roy began to realize how intimidating he must be. As Althaia pulled her sword out from its sheave, the snowman portrait waved and wobbled viciously. In fear Althaia jumped in her older self's-I mean Althaia jumped in _Roy's _arms. Malaria—who was clad in a blue parka and black snow boots was annoyed heavily. "'MAMA! WHERE'S MY MAMA!' the darn baby penguin must've said at least 1,000 times!" Malaria wailed while flailing her arms in annoyance, wanting to pull her hair from the roots hearing its annoying voice for so long. "But who cares! I got this wicked-awesome star!" Malaria said as she threw the Power Star above her head and snatched it back up. Looking to her right to see her swordsmen pals, she smiled in excitement. "Hi guys!" Malaria exclaimed happily. "What's up…?" She then saw Althaia-who she thought was Chibi Roy—in Roy's arms. "Awww, so kyuuuute~!" Malaria said as she clasped her hands together. Althaia stared into Roy's sea-blue eyes, and as did he stare into hers. This went on for about ten seconds. "Uh…hi." Althaia said sheepishly, purposely falling out of the swordsman's grasp. "Aww, it's Chibi Roy!" Malaria had let out a fangirl squeal. She hugged the girl tightly, and Althaia couldn't breathe. "Can't breathe…help…me…beep." Althaia nearly suffocated. "Let her go, Malaria." Marth spoke, coming next to the two girls. "Her?" Malaria repeated. _What does he mean her?_ Malaria thought to herself, scratching her head in confusion. "That is your sister, Althaia, correct me if I'm wrong." Said the blue-haired prince. "Yes, you ARE wrong! Does this cute wittle boy wook wike Althaia to you?" Malaria said babyishly with her eyes closed and blushing, having Althaia's face pressed against hers while moving it up in down. "No, seriously, that IS Althaia. She started doing voice impressions of me and this happened!" Roy said. Examining closely, Malaria noticed that his—her eyes did have dark circles under them, like Althaia's. Proving this "Chibi Roy" thing fake, Althaia slowly said, "I…need my… I need my… JOE JAVA LATTE MOCHA COFFEE ON THE DOUBLE!" Althaia said, frantically flailing. "Oh—HOLY SPIT, gosh no!" Malaria dropped Althaia on the ground. "Gosh! How do you sound like Roy?!" Malaria asked, confused beyond belief. "How am I supposed to know? You're the author of this fan-"

No. We're not going there. Plain and simple.

"Hi guys! I was in the bathroom for a really long time, what did I miss?" the excited ginger asked, the said character being Princess Daisy.

"Oh, you see, this is what happened…" started Roy.

After twenty minutes, Daisy nodded her head. "Oh, I see! Wow! Talk about weird!" she exclaimed.

"I have a question; why in the world did that explanation take so long?!" Marth asked crankily as he folded his arms.

"Oh, and Roy, you're a general, huh?"

Spitting out his coffee that Chibi Roy—I mean Althaia should have had, he looked at Daisy with shock. "Wait a minute-how do you know all this?!"

Daisy chuckled. "Calm down, ya flamethrower. Baby Daisy's been stalking you for the last few months!" Daisy chimed. "Isn't she silly?" Roy scratched his head. "I didn't even _know_ there was a baby version of you," Roy replied. "You didn't? But she's been following you for about a year now! She tells me some interesting things about you sometimes!" Daisy spoke.

-FLASHBACK-

Princess Daisy was on her Daisy Cruiser, sitting in one of the many beach chairs next to her pool on her cruise ship. She was reading a magazine about fashion, generically called "Summer Fashions." All was calm until Baby Daisy came riding on her Quacker. She parked it just inches away from the pool. "Daisy!" the toddler cried out. "Oh, hiya Baby Daisy! What's up?" the tomboyish princess said to her counterpart. "Guess what?! I followed Roy alllll over the world! He went to some weird places!" the baby girl informed her older counterpart. "Oh, really?" Daisy chuckled, as the persistent Baby Daisy was waving her hands up and down. "Yeah, yeah! Ya gotta bewieve me, Daisy!" the baby started talking in her babyish accent. "He hanged out in the Smash Brothers Mansion place, and he tripped on this toy thingy someone left in the hawaway, and then this is what he started saying: OH, GOSH! What *censored* left this *censored* in the *censored* hallway?! *Censored censored censored* Yeah! I'm fowweal!" By now, Daisy was quite aware of that, her eye twitching. "Oh, and then Marth started calling him mean stuff, and the dude with the green hat started laffing so hard. Then Roy took out his sword and beat the crap outta 'em wiff it! It was fire everywhere, and then the whole mansion burned down! Crazy stuff started happening and stuff, and Mario was all like "MAMMA MIA! What's-a going on-a?" or something, and it was so weird. I don't really remember that much because I took a nap on Roy's shoulders. I don't remember nothing because I hit my head on a dooraway while I was asleeping, and Baby Speech came and woke me up. Roy never knew I was there, it was so funny! Even though I was on his shoulders the whole time! Isn't it funny, Daisy? I even camped out a few nights with him in his room and he didn't even know! It was so funny! He's a general or something like that, too! Also, he dropped this somewhere so I picked it up and took it!"

Daisy's right eye twitched, seeing Baby Daisy swing the Sword of Seals around, and knocked her Quacker into the water. "Oh, and Daisy, I heard he's a…a…a…a…a….a…"

Baby Daisy started again with the Sword of Seals over her shoulders, unaware that it was starting to smoke. "He's a…?" Daisy repeated what Baby Daisy had been saying for the past twenty seconds. "He's a-a..pyro-manac!" Baby Daisy finally said, in her baby accent. "A PYROMANIAC!? That explains why that sword is-HOLY MOLY, FIRE FIRE FIRE!" Daisy screamed, and chaos ensued.

-END FLASHBACK-

"Wow! So there's been a twit stalking me for a _year_ now?! So that's why I felt so heavy that day…" Roy said, shaking his head. "Eh, she's just a little squirt. She couldn't harm a soul!" Daisy said.

"Heeheeheehee!" a small, squeaky voice was heard.

Everyone was now alarmed, the ones who were sitting now stood on their feet. "What was THAT?" said a panicked Daisy. "Even I don't know!" Malaria said, shivering. "How can you not know?! This is your hometown." Marth said. "I dunno, I dunno, I dunno." Malaria said, becoming angry slowly but surely. "Nah-nah!" the voice teased again.

"What?! Not again!" Roy shrieked, and everyone looked at him. "AHH! IS IT JOHN JOHNSON'S DAUGHTER OR SON, THE NEW VOICE IN _OUR _HEADS?!" Malaria screamed. All eyes on Malaria. "NO! NOT A VOICE IN OUR HEADS!" Roy screamed. "A…ghost in our heads!" Everyone gasped when he said that, except for Althaia. "That's stupid," Marth realized. "NO IT MAKES SENSE!" Daisy screeched. "How can you have a voice in your head? It _has _to be a ghost!" Malaria, Roy, Daisy and Marth started going back and forth with their argument, and their nonsense was starting to wear on Althaia's nerves. Eventually, the girl redheaded pyro snapped. "WILL ALL OF YOU SHUT UP ALREADY?! THERE IS NO GHOST OR ANY FREAKING VOICES IN OUR HEAD; IT'S JUST THAT GIRL BEHIND THE DARN COUCH! YEEAAAAAH!" Althaia yelled at them, breathing heavily and panting, then curled up and sat on the floor. Her sea-blue eyes were now dilated, which looked quite creepy. (A/N: Yeah, her eyes _did _look creepy while that small. Not only did her eyes have those black rings around it, but uh…you could see small flames in her eyes...*shudders*) Everyone silenced. "Girl behind the…couch?" Daisy said, scratching her head. Everyone pondered the situation while chattering silently careful not to disturb the girl with anger problems. "Ah-ha!" the voice laughed again. Everyone stopped what they were doing. Still hearing silent snickers from… _behind the couch, _everyone slowly approached it. Looking behind it was another redhead. But we're going to call her a ginger for less confusion. She looked similar to Daisy, but she wasn't. She was Baby Daisy. "EGAD!" Everyone yelled. "Baby Daisy?! What are you doing here?" Daisy asked as she bended over, looking at Baby Daisy. "Stalking Roy." The baby said innocently. "Oh, why?" "I don't know." Baby Daisy then hopped over the couch and landed on the coffee table. "I followed him because Baby Speech was too busy fangirling over a picture of Chrom she found, and plus, I never get to be in these fanfics," Baby Daisy said. "O…kay…then." Roy said, being kind of creeped out by Baby Daisy.

"Hey everybody, where is Young Link and Peach?" Malaria asked. Silence filled the room once again, and they could hear spilling coming from the kitchen. They ran into the kitchen, to see Young Link guzzling down a gallon of milk. Princess Peach was on the ground, lying unconscious. She'd obviously been knocked out for trying to stop him from drinking the milk. "Stop, you milk thief!" cried an angered Malaria. "I was saving that for my FrootLoops!"

"Never! You'll never get this milk back! Wahaha!" Young Link laughed maniacally.

"Actually, I wasn't going to try and stop you." Said Malaria.

"Oh." A surprised Young Link said.

Althaia was now burning a bag of beans with her sword. "Beans…they burn…" she said, still with Roy's voice.

"Why does Althaia sound like you, Roy?" Young Link asked.

"I dunno."

"Oh."

"Oh no! She caught WhosItMaVoiceitis!" screamed the pink clad princess. "Peach? I thought you were unconscious." Said Malaria. "I was, but I woke up when I smelled burning beans," the blond spoke.

"What's WhosItMaVoiceitis?" Marth asked, regretting he did.

"It's a rare disease that you can catch trying to sound like someone else! If you do a too good impression, you might start thinking you're the said person! But, there's a cure!" the princess said.

"What?" Daisy asked, curiously.

"Green tea leaves, picked from an oak tree far, far, far, FAR away from here!"

"Oh joy." Said Althaia, sarcastically.

"Aww, Chibi Roy is so cute!" Peach said, and squealed. They all looked at her like she was stupid…

which she is.

"You know, she IS still cute, even if her voice doesn't fit at all." Malaria said.

"How DARE you call me cute! You think this is FUNNY!?" Althaia said, grabbing her Sword of Seals.

"Oh yeah? COME AT ME BRO!" Malaria grabbed her sword.

The two girls began clashing swords with exaggerated battle cries. This went on for ten minutes. Soon, Malaria began to hear a voice in her head. "No! Not John Johnson!" Malaria screamed. "Foolish being," John Johnson said, also known as the voice in her head. "Surely you will lose! You are fighting a crazy pyromaniac who can spew gushes of flames from that thing in one swift motion! Dodge, ya nitwit!" John Johnson, the voice in her head commanded. "John Johnson…?" Everyone but Althaia and Malaria said. "Yeah, the voice in my head," she said, still at it with Althaia. The fiery redheaded general cosplayer thought to herself, _Wait a minute. I can blast her to oblivion with my flames!_ In one swift motion, a flare of fire was inches from hitting Malaria. Dodging, she was disarmed of her sword. "UKULELE!" Malaria screamed.

_Will Althaia ever be Althaia again? Why did Malaria scream "Ukulele"? Why is Baby Daisy stalking Roy? Will they go an adventure to get the green tee leaves? Find out in the next chapter of "The Misadventures of Malaria and Althaia: The Smashers Visit!"_

A/N: Whew! Finally finished! Two chapters in one day! That's an A+++! As you can see, I never played Fire Emblem. I only heard of some of the characters. So, yeah.

Malaria: Save my sister! I don't want Chibi Roy!

Althaia: I don't appreciate sounding like this. I _really _DON'T.

We know. Also, nothing against people who love that RoyxMarth pairing. I just don't support it. I wonder if that parody actually made people fangirl…

Roy: Please, no long Author's Notes. Haven't we been through enough?

Maybe… and you burned most of the Author's Notes anyway.

Roy: AREN'T YOU GLAD YOU AREN'T THE ONE BEING COSPLAYED BY A CRAZY GIRL, AND STALKED BY A CRAZY BABY?!

Yes.

Weeelll, bye y'all. My back hurts, and I'm just plain mush after doing this. Read and review please! ;3


	3. Wild Chases! New Faces! And also farts?

A/N: Well, guys, what do you think of this story so far? It would matter not if this got popular, because I just had fun writing it. Oh, and this isn't the last chapter. There might be 10 chapters or more! Woohoo!

Althaia: 10…chapters…of this nonsense?! WHY?!

Because it's fun.

Roy: (English Subtitles) When will Althaia stop sounding like me?

Soon, maybe.

Marth: (English Subtitles) When will I be removed from this fanfiction?

Soon, maybe-hey!

Daisy: Can we please get back to the fanfiction?

Peach: Yes, it is quite stuffy in this cramped writing office.

Baby Daisy: Will you add Baby Speech?

Yeah, yeah yeah, add Baby Peach. Someone do the disclaimer!

Samyatang: All of the Nintendo characters belong to their rightful owners, John Johnson belongs to its rightful owners, and any other copyrighted material belongs to its owners.

Who the heck is Samyatang?

Samyatang: I'll BE GONE! *disappears*

Roy: (English Subtitles) Can we start so nothing else weird can happen?

START IT!

Our eight heroes were sitting in the living room, doing nothing. And the nothingness the living room held caused quite a silence…"NOBODY FART!" Malaria screamed to the top of her lungs, and stood up, her sword Ukulele being treated for burns. Yup. That's it. Her sword's name is Ukulele. "Aw…" Roy, Peach and Young Link said in disappointment. "What are we doing?" Princess Daisy asked herself, scratching her head. "Maaan, I dunno…" Baby Daisy said, lying on the coffee table. "I need HELP… Call the mental institution, the insane asylum, and the fire department," Althaia blurted out of nowhere.

"Why don't we just call Dr. Mario?" Peach asked gleefully. "NO." everyone said except for Peach, who whimpered in rejection. "What about the green tea leaves, you know, the antidote for Althaia? She's creeping me out with that voice…" Young Link said as he cringed in fear as Althaia shot Young Link a glare from across the room. "No, let's not go on some crummy adventure. I'd rather stay like this instead of doing that." Althaia said. "Mama Mia! Time is-a running out! She-a already is starting-a to think she is-a really-a Roy!" Malaria said, now with and Italian accent. "Why the sudden Italian accent?" Roy said, curiously. "Huh? What-a did you say-a? I don't-a know no Japanese-a!" Malaria finally said. "I don't know no Italian!" Roy said back to her. "Can everybody just talk English?" Baby Daisy said. "Uh…no." Marth said bluntly, and Baby Daisy shrugged. Suddenly, noises could be heard from the foyer. "What is that?" Malaria said. "Well don't just stand there, people! You guys have powers and junk; go save us from the burglar!" Malaria screamed frantically. "Oh yeah!" the videogame characters shouted in realization. "No." they each said one at a time.

"Why the heck not?!" Malaria commented, folding her arms. "Because," Young Link started. "We don't know how. We've never dealt with burglars. We only dealt with monsters and stuff like that." Althaia and Malaria simply looked at each other, as though if they were about to say something to one another. After about thirty seconds of soulless, bleak quietness and no communication whatsoever, Malaria finally stated, "We've came to a conclusion. We'll handle it." "Um…what the living frap? You guys didn't even say anything to each other." Daisy pointed out. "It's a special ability we have; mind reading. You guys can't do that, only we can." Althaia said. "Ooh! Ooh! What am I thinking about?!" Peach squealed frantically. "Pink, hearts, glitter, ponies, Mario, rainbows and…farting?" Malaria then said, scratching her head in confusion. "Tee hee…" Peach giggled as she blushed slightly, now closing her eyes. "Um…mmkay. Just don't blow any wind right now…" said Malaria, who shook her head in disgust. "BwaaHAHAHAAA!" a light voice cried from the foyer. Everyone gawked and stood up once again, and Baby Daisy slid off of the coffee table, landing on her backside. Suddenly, Malaria and Althaia dashed into the foyer. "Help, oh please help!" a small, squeaky voice cried out. A very short pink-clad blonde princess ran smack into Malaria's legs, falling backwards on her back. It was none other than Baby Speech—err Baby Peach. "Whawhawhawha!" Baby Peach cried. "Oh my gosh, it's Baby Peach!? What are you doing here?!" Malaria asked. "Is it Baby Roy? Where is Baby Chrom?!" Baby Peach stood to her feet immediately, forgetting about her previous problems, and ignoring Malaria. "I'm not Baby Roy," Althaia said in annoyance. "I'm Althaia." "But ya look like Little Roy!" Baby Peach cried. Althaia did not reply, instead, facepalmed. "It's a long story, Baby Peach. She has WhosItMaVoiceItis, and-""WHOSITMAVOICEITIS?! SPEAK NO MORE! YOU MUST ADVANCE ON THE SITUIATION!" Baby Peach screamed, now running in circles. Althaia groaned in annoyance, holding her right hand out in front of her, as Baby Peach then face planted into Althaia's palm. "Cool it, kiddo. Now tell us what's up. What's the deal with you screaming and junk?" Althaia asked, as she folded her arms. Baby Peach blinked her eyes. "Oh, right!" she said as her eyes lit up. "Well, ya see, I was-a being chased by-a Chain Chomp, and then I just-a start running. I didn't know-a what happened, but-a I got-a sucked up in this swirly-a vortex from thin air, and I-a came out of a television! And so did a Chain-Chomp-a!" Baby Peach exclaimed while flailing her arms about. "So…lemme get this straight: a Chain-Chomp is IN THE HOUSE?!" Malaria screamed to the top of her lungs. "Yup, that's right-a!" the cheery baby princess said. Althaia and Malaria looked at each other. The trio ran out of the foyer, with Malaria saying, "Run, run, run, run, run run run run run," The other characters sat up and looked about. "Run where?" Baby Daisy said. "Let's get outta here. There's a wild Chain-Chomp in here!" Malaria screamed. "Nani?! Chen Chomp made?!" Roy said, getting awkward glares from several people. "We'll figure out what the Helen Keller Roy said later. But now's time to RUUN!" Princess Daisy exclaimed as she jumped out of her seat.

A viewing of the front door could be seen, as our nine heroes burst loudly out of the house, screaming and crying for dear mercy. They ran for what felt like hours, but it got even worse when a faint "BARK BARK!" sound effect was heard in the distance, followed by chain clanking. "Oh. OH. Oh. NO." Baby Daisy said, looking behind her and seeing the Chain-Chomp gaining on them increasingly. "Wareware wa, kono reta de sore o tsukuru tsumori wa arimasen yo!" Roy screamed. "NO ONE KNOWS WHAT THE H.E DOUBLE HOCKEY STICKS YOU ARE SAYING, ROY!" Daisy said, as they all continued to run. As they ran, they overlooked the "bottomless pit" sign that was dead ahead. Our heroes kept pickin' up as…."AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

They screamed as they fell into the bottomless pit, with some crying and some farting. (A/N: Yeah, I couldn't resist. Not that I'm obsessed with toilet humor, or anything.) "WE'RE ALL GANNA DIE!" Malaria screamed. "Watashi wa kono sekai ni itte inainode, oku no koto ga arimasu!" Roy screamed. "Hm. I've been here before. This is the bottomless pit." Althaia exclaimed. "BOTTOMLESS PIT?!" everyone shrieked in horror, excluding Roy and Marth who said, "SOKONASHI?!" "Wha! How do we get OUTTA the bottomless pit?!" Malaria asked. "By waiting. Eventually we'll come out from the top." Althaia said. "And just how long do we have to wait?" Daisy asked, folding her arms. "About a good twenty-three minutes." Althaia said. "Hey, I got an idea! Why don't we engage in telling FART stories?!" Peach exclaimed gleefully, clasping her hands together. "…You can't be serious." Marth said. "I am." Peach replied. "Oh, why do I even bother…?" Marth said as he facepalmed, shaking his head in disbelief. "Okay, so how about I go first?" Peach said. "It happened sometime in 2012…" Peach said, as the screen went all wavy and faded out into a white background.

-FLASHBACK-

Peach, Daisy and Baby Daisy where in the elevator, which had broken down due to technical difficulties. Baby Princess Daisy was on her knees, praying that she wouldn't be involved in the gassy girls' farting activities. Princess Daisy puffed up her cheeks and closed her eyes, farting a loud fart that echoed throughout the elevator, with Baby Daisy banging her head on the wall. "That was a good one, Daisy! But try to beat this one…" Peach closed her eyes and placed both hands on her stomach. A HUGE fart shook the entire elevator, not only causing it to come completely off its shaft, but to explode into a billion metallic pieces, with Princess Peach, Daisy, and Baby Daisy screaming for they're lives, and with Daisy coughing from the terrible stench. "IT'S A GOOD TIME TO PRAISE THE FACT THAT I DON'T HAVE A NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSE!"

Baby Daisy screamed, as they fell to their gassy doom. One more gusty fart from the pink-clad princess's rear end caused the entire place they were in to collapse on itself. And the Mushroom Medical Center ambulance was on the prowl.

-END FLASHBACK-

"Um…wow." Malaria said, now being creeped out by Peach a lot more than she already was. "That's a flashback that I'd rather think about." Baby Daisy said, covering her eyes and shaking her head. "Really? That's how low you people are? All nine of us are going to individually tell fart stories to pass the time? That's wacky!" Young Link said. "And now that I've opened my mouth, I'm next to tell a fart story, huh?" Young Link said. "Yup." Everyone exclaimed.

-FLASHBACK-

Young Link was on the Clock Tower, located in Clock Town, which is in Termina, awaiting the clock to strike twelve o'clock midnight for his final encounter with the Skull Kid. He was about to down a bottle of Chateau Romani milk, having not enough money to spend on magic potions. However, it was actually convenient for him, as he liked the taste a lot more than magic potion. But he hadn't forgotten all about the foul consequences it could cause for him. "Well, down the hatch," Young Link says as he pulled out the cork out of the bottle. "I'll give the Skull Kid a very unpleasant surprise… Heh, heh." He then drank the full bottle of Chateau Romani in a matter of seconds, wiping his mouth, feeling refreshed, and gassy. It did not take long at all for his gassiness to kick in, thanks to the magical properties within the beverage. Alas, the clock stroke twelve o'clock midnight, as the stairs leading to the Clock Tower fell down. Young Link snickered, getting a mischievous idea as he headed up the steps. The Skull Kid spoke his lines, blah blah blah, and they were ready for the battle. Just to tease, Young Link shot an arrow at Skull Kid, as he flinched. "That won't do you any good…hee hee." Skull Kid says. "Oh yeah? Well I'll tell you what won't do YOU any good: floating up there like an idiot where you should be fighting like a man!" Young Link snapped sassily, getting in a fighting position. "Link, I wouldn't do that if I were you…" Tatl, the fairy then peaked from under his green hat. "Shut it, Tatl." Young Link said in annoyance. Skull Kid could only cackle at his ignorance. "Oh wait, I was wrong. A two-bit toilet bowl like you couldn't even fight a fairy. Hah ha!" Young Link said, now striking a few nerves. Link continued to make jokes at the Skull Kid that the author wouldn't dare repeat, some insults featuring "emo scarecrow" and "Skull Dork". After a while, Skull Kid landed on the ground, screaming and yelling as Young Link laughed uncontrollably. "That's it. **THAT'S IT. **You've officially crossed the line!" Skull Kid screamed. "Yeah? And what are you gonna do about it?" Young Link retorted as he narrowed his eyes, placing his hands on his hips. "What will I do? What will _I _do?!" Skull Kid says angrily, as a pair of 35-ton brass knuckle boxing gloves appeared on his wooden fists, "I'll SHOW you what I'll do!" "Eep! Link, look what you've got us into now!" Tatl says. "Wait, what the heck?! How'd you get boxing gloves?!" Link asked, now becoming nervous. "I have my ways. And sadly, you won't find your way out of this…hee hee." Skull Kid says. Skull Kid charged at Young Link, as Young Link screamed like a girl. Suddenly, an earth shattering fart was heard throughout the entire world of Termina, causing not only the entire Clock Tower to collapse on itself, but shatter the Moon into huge flaming chunky rocks. The only thing the moon could do before its humorous elimination was shed a few tears. And the flaming chunks of the moon's remains crashed on pretty much all of the land of Termina, destroying all of Great Bay, Ikana Canyon, Snowhead, and Southern Swamp, and all the other areas in the game. And Link crashed inside the Clock Tower, where the Happy Mask Salesman stays. "I've met with a terrible fate, haven't I?" Link says with his arms crossed, looking at the Happy Mask Salesman, who was still looking weird and creepy, like nothing even happened. He then frowns and says, "YES." Link then gawks, farting loudly again, as more rubble fell on him, effectively giving him a Game Over Screen.

-END FLASHBACK-

"And that's the true story of how I got out of Termina. Nintendo just wouldn't dare have the game end that way, so they cut that part out and made me go through another darned level," Young Link exclaimed. Malaria then shuddered, feeling creeped out by Young Link now. "What a… interesting story." Peach says, with her left eye twitching. "Eh…now I just don't know about you anymore, Young Link…" Baby Daisy says. "Ah, relax Baby Daisy. You don't gotta worry about none of that stuff happening around here…That is, unless I happen to get my hands on some of that Chateau again…" Young Link says, with Baby Daisy shuddering in disgust. Malaria then coughed. "Um…eh…whoa. Now I'm uh, kinda weirded out…" Malaria says. "If you think that's bad, then you definitely don't want to hear the story of when I ate too many beans," Roy exclaimed.

-FLASHBACK-

It all started in the overused Smash Bros. Mansion, where—**BLOCKED; CONTENT PROHIBITED BY THE AUTHOR. **The author dare write Roy's story, as they don't want to be accused of too much toilet humor. Let's just say that it involved a LOT of farting that would bump this fanfiction up to a T-rating, and that would cause multiple problems. Basically, Roy destroyed the Smash Bros. Mansion with his farting, and caused havoc on Nintendo World or wherever they live. Chaos ensued. You, the reader may not have been able to read it, but everyone in the fanfiction did…

-END FLASHBACK-

"No, GOD! No, gosh please no! No! No! NOOOOOO!" Malaria screamed. "Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Baby Peach yelled. "My MIND! It HURTS! ASDFGHJKL;'" Young Link wailed. "Aw, come on! It wasn't even THAT bad!" Roy admitted as he chuckled. "Then why did the author prohibit it!?" Peach says.

"While you guys are drabbling over the horror, no one seems to have noticed that I have the green tea leaves," Baby Daisy exclaimed. "WHAT?!" everyone exclaimed. "Mm-hm, that's right. I saw the leaves in Roy's flashback, so I swiped 'em!" Baby Daisy exclaimed as she pulled out the green tea leaves. "Wow, kid. Can't believe you actually got the leaves. Now what do I do with them?" Althaia says. "Well, as probably expected, you eat them. Then you should go back to normal," Princess Peach explained. Without hesitation, Althaia ate the green tea leaves. "BLECH! Yeesh, that's freaking bitter…" Althaia says, sticking her tongue out in disgust. "So, how do ya feel?" Malaria asks Althaia. "Heavy. I mean, why am I wearing armor?" Althaia says, now with her own voice. "Aw, yeah! Your voice is back!" Malaria said. "Good. Glad that's over…otherwise this could have gotten really bizarre!" Roy said. "…So who's next to tell a fart story?" Peach asked. "No, we can't! The author prohibited it!" Malaria said. "Oh, really? Well, author, prohibit this!" Roy exclaimed as he farted loudly. "O cruel world, why…" Marth said. "No. No. NO. No more farting stories. Does anyone WANT this fanfiction to be T-rated?" Malaria said. "YES." Everyone said. "By giving this a T-rating, that will give me and Althaia access to do some hardcore fangirling. And we ALL know how that'll end." Malaria says. "So do you guys still want a T-rating?" "NO." everyone shouted. Then suddenly, our nine heroes came out of the bottomless pit, landing on ground. "Wowee kazowee y'all, that was weird!" Malaria said. "You can say that again," Althaia says, adjusting her hat with her left hand. "Wowee kazowee y'all, that was weird!" Malaria said. "You can say that again," Althaia says, adjusting her hat with her left hand. "Wowee kazowee y'all, that was weird!" Malaria said. "You can say that again," Althaia says, adjusting her hat with her left hand. "Wowee kazowee y'all, that was weird!" Malaria said. "You can say that again," Althaia says, adjusting her hat with her left hand. "Wowee kazowee y'all, that was weird!" Malaria said. "You can say that again," Althaia says, adjusting her hat with her left hand. "Wowee kazowee y'all, that was weird!" Malaria said. "You can say that again," Althaia says, adjusting her hat with her left hand. "Wowee kazowee y'all, that was weird!" Malaria said. "You can say that again," Althaia says, adjusting her hat with her left hand. "Wowee kazowee y'all, that was weird!" Malaria said. "You can say that again," Althaia says, adjusting her hat with her left hand. "Wowee kazowee y'all, that was weird!" Malaria said. "You can say that again," Althaia says, adjusting her hat with her left hand. "Wowee kazowee y'all, that was weird!" Malaria said. "You can say that again," Althaia says, adjusting her hat with her left hand. "Wowee kazowee y'all, that was weird!" Malaria said. "You can say that again," Althaia says, adjusting her hat with her left hand. "Wowee kazowee y'all, that was weird!" Malaria said. "You can say that again," Althaia says, adjusting her hat with her left hand. "Wowee kazowee y'all, that was weird!" Malaria said. "You can say that again," Althaia says, adjusting her hat with her left hand. "Wowee kazowee y'all, that-" NO. No, that's enough just- NO. No. No. We're done. We're done with that part of our lives. "#DaTruthBeTold" Princess Daisy exclaimed in a more country-ish accent than usual. "Ain't nobody got time fo dat!" Young Link says as he frowned, folding his arms. "JINKIES!" Roy added for humorous purposes. "fake" Baby Daisy exclaimed. "NINJA…GO!" Peach blurted out. "Don't tase me bro!" Marth exclaimed. "hax" Malaria said. "Shrek is love, Shrek is life." Althaia said.

"GET OUT" Baby Peach says. "Okay, I see exactly where this is going," Samyatang said, stepping out of Baby Daisy's shadow. "Oh my gosh, it's Shadow Baby Daisy!" Peach shouted in shock, pointing at Samyatang, who looked exactly like Baby Daisy, just with no colors and a blue-colored antenna on her head. "Silence, mortal! I am no mere Shadow Baby Daisy! I am Samyatang! I was sent by the Authors to come and protect those who break the Fourth Wall." Samyatang says. "Oh, you mean like the fact that I can see the Author typing at the computer this very moment?" Malaria exclaimed. "Yes. Now we have to use the plot hole in this fanfiction to get out of it." Samyatang says. "Does this story even HAVE a plot hole?" Roy asked. "Maybe. Just think of something that seems off in this story." "Well, I can think of something." Baby Peach says. "When we fell in the seemingly bottomless pit, there _was _a Chain-Chomp after us. But as we fell in, it seemingly vanished from the plot. AND, if it was still after us, wouldn't it have come from the bottomless pit as well?" Baby Peach says. "Hm. Intellectual baby." Roy says. "Po-lot hole!" Malaria added. "Now let's warp outta this fanfiction so we can get back to the Author's notes!" Baby Daisy commented. "Wait, so do we have to get _in _the plot hole?!" Althaia asked, scratching her head. "That's the plan!" Samyatang said. "Althaia, you may not sound like me anymore, but why are you still dressed as me?" Roy commented. "Oh yeah," Althaia says. "I'll take it off." She says as she was about to take the top off. "Wait, are you going to change clothes in front of me…?" Roy asked, twitching his left eye. "Are you gonna let me?" Althaia said as she winked her right eye. "Oh, ew! Gross, man! Just NO!" Roy says, covering his face and shaking his head. Althaia then quickly stripped herself out of Roy's clothing, revealing her usual clothing. "Are you kidding? Dude, I'm desperate, but I'm not that desperate. For real." Althaia said, folding her arms. "When you are all done with your human shenanigans, we can get in the plothole." Samyatang exclaimed, readjusting her large gray crown. "Well, okay! Open the plothole up!" Malaria says. "Okay," Samyatang says. "O hummye bunny pencak silat lotta choca… o hummye bunny reka lotsa spaghetti…BOOM!" Samyatang then chanted as the plothole opened up in front of them. "Well, what are you waiting for? Get in, this won't stay open forever." Samyatang exclaimed. "But what about you, Samyatang?" Malaria asked curiously. "Like I said earlier, I was sent by the Authors to protect those who break the Fourth Wall…" Samyatang started. "…meaning that I have to stay in the Realm of Fiction to protect more like your kind." Samyatang stated. "Oh, okay. Well buh-bye, Samyatang!" Malaria stated. Our nine heroes then jumped into the swirling vortex that is a plothole, getting materialized into little microchips of data.

A/N: Well guys, that was Chapter 3 of _The Misadventures of Malaria and Althaia: The Smashers Visit! _To you, this chapter only took like a couple of hours for me to make, but for me, it was a whopping 2 months. I took a hiatus since I had low inspiration, but I realized that this fanfiction can be as random as I want it to be. Another thing I'd like to add is that I am NOT, I repeat; I am NOT obsessed with toilet humor. As I said I was low on inspiration so I tossed in some random toilet humor. It just may be in another chapter of this, but it definitely won't go too far. Also, the rating will not be T-rated because I want to keep this viewer-friendly. It's K+ for a reason. I will add more characters to this fanfiction. I know since I have Princess Peach and Daisy in this fanfiction people probably want me to add Rosalina. And since I have Marth and Roy in this fanfiction, people are going to want me to add Ike. And since I have Young Link in this fanfiction, people are going to want me to add Toon Link. But that might be later. I mean like two chapters later. And since I have Malaria and Althaia, people are going to want—oops! Can't tell ya who that is! Anyway, Baby Daisy and Baby Peach were total shoo-ins for this fanfiction, as I felt that they were NEVER included in enough fanfictions, so I did it myself. Also, I kinda get the vibe that Baby Peach and Baby Daisy _aren't _the infant versions of Peach and Daisy. They're something different. Samyatang was literally made up from the top of my head sometime near the first chapter. She was originally going to be added then, but then I second-guessed it. There WILL be more Samyatang, though.

The Nine Heroes: *materializes in*

You know, "The Nine Heroes Materializes In!" would be a funny pun for a Smash Bros. 4 character introduction. Just imagine Malaria, Althaia, Roy, Marth, Young Link, Peach, Daisy, Baby Peach and Baby Daisy all getting announced for SSB4…LOL! xD

Malaria: Author's notes sweet author's notes! *smooches the floor*

Baby Daisy: I'mma back!

Althaia: And so is my voice!

Yay, you guys got Althaia's voice back! How was the adventure?

Baby Peach: It was…shocking.

Mm, do tell.

Baby Peach: Just read it. I don't wanna bother going through the gory details.

Gory…details? Yikes.

Marth: You should know. You prohibited it in the first place.

Oh.

Roy: I tell ya, it wasn't that bad!

Young Link: LIES!

Daisy: Ditto!

Peach: Well, I've been through worst, actually, Roy.

Roy: I doubt it.

Malaria: She's lying, burn her, burn her…

Althaia: Burn her? More like reh nruB

Baby Daisy: Rats live on no evil star. Say it backwards.

Roy: .rats live on no evil staR

Baby Peach: Whoa! Mind blown!

Daisy: Racecar. Say it backwards.

Marth: .racecaR

You guys are such silly creatures.

Young Link: I'm a Hylian.

Roy: I'm a half-dragon.

Marth: I'm Altean.

Malaria: I'mma Randomian.

Althaia: I'm a Gothian.

Peach: I'm a mushroom princess.

Daisy: I'm an alien princess.

Baby Daisy: I'm an infant version of an alien princess.

Baby Peach: I'm an infant version of a mushroom princess.

Fat Random Dude Rolling in the Tire from the First Chapter: I'mma pedestrian!

Everybody: GET OUT.

A/N: Well, I will see you all when I make the next chapter! Bye! And to think I actually did 2 pages of an author's notes… Yeesh…


	4. Le Dreaded House

Kawaii Pinkberry: I… didn't think I would continue this after Chapter 3. But I want more fanfiction! I've been bored outta my mind, so I just wanna write a fourth chapter! Sadly, my inspiration is-

Malaria: TACO SAUCE!

What the crabbage?!

Roy: What the—wait, what?!

Marth: I often question my existence in this fanfiction, and yet I get no answer.

You won't find an answer… You were literally just added to this fanfiction for humorous purposes.

Althaia: On the bright side, I've got no more WhosItMaVoiceItis.

Baby Daisy: Oh, joyous day, we are all-

NO.

Baby Daisy: Does anyone remember what gay actually means?

Roy: What the-wait… How old are you, anyway, Baby Daisy?

Baby Daisy: For the sake of humanity, we're just going to call me, uh, six.

Marth: You? Six? A six-year-old usually doesn't know what humanity, or sake means… You're obviously fibbing.

Baby Daisy: Do you _really _want to go on with this? I mean, for real.

Is this really important?

Baby Peach: No, it's not important. You guys are making a mountain out of a molehill.

Peach: Preach, baby!

Daisy: And there goes my tofu burger.

Young Link: You eat tofu?

Daisy: No. I just wanted to step in it and say "HA! I got tofu between my toes, foo!"

Young Link: …Good to know.

Malaria: Water, water _whaaaaaaaalesss…_

Roy: What the actual *beep*

Baby Daisy: Oh—for shame! Roy said the REAL thing! Shun him! Shun him! Shun. That. Red. Headed. General. Who. Has. An. Obsession. With. The. Fire.

Hey hey hey, keep it PG, kiddies. We don't want RPTFP.

Peach: RPTFP?

Baby Peach: Eww, you-a pooted, Peach-a! Gross, just-a gross!

Peach: No, I said RPTFP! I did not pass gas!

Baby Peach: Then explain-a that awful stench-a!

Peach: …Um, I need to use the little ladies' room.

Baby Peach: I have a question. How-a are you-a the older-a version of-a me if you-a still aren't-a potty trained?

Peach: I'll BE GONE! *runs off to the bathroom*

Young Link: No comment.

Althaia: Took the words right out of my mouth.

Young Link: How so? I didn't say anything.

Althaia: No comment was exactly the comment that I was going to comment.

Young Link: Wait… Your logic doesn't make any sense. How was no comment going to be the comment that you commented when no comment is not a comment at all? That only makes sense if no comment was a comment and it was used for sarcastic purposes, making one gullible enough to believe it was actually no comment…

Althaia: Boom. There ya go. You answered your own question.

Young Link: Oh… I'm so freakin' smart!

Roy: What does RPTFP mean?

Real Primary Trouble From Parents. It could get us in too much trouble, so we can't go off the deep end.

Malaria: OH MY GO—YAAAH MY EYES! THEY BURN! THEY BURN! OUCH! OUCH! OH! WHOA HO!

Roy: Whoa, what's wrong with you?

Malaria: It's an insanely cute but perverted picture of Blue Toad in a Cat Suit!

Roy: It can't be that bad. *looks at picture of Cat Toad* AITSU MACCORNAI! MY EYES! MYE YEYES!

Malaria: THAT'S NOT EVEN JAPANESE!

Hey, hey, hey-hey hey! Keep it PG, kiddies!

Daisy: Lemme look at it… *looks at picture* Wow… Toad actually looks hot. Oh, Toadette is gonna have a hoot with this… *snickers*

KEEP IT PG. kthxbai

Abay Aisy: What! My natural born eyes! They burn like the cinnamon challenge!

Daisy: Who is Abay Aisy?

Baby Daisy: The author made a terrible typo when typing my name, so she just decided to go with it.

We haven't even started the fanfiction yet.

Everybody: *gasps* *looks at the author* *gets in fighting pose*

Hold up! Wait! I just need to do the disclaimer! Don't tase me bro!

Roy: Tell it to the judge. *handcuffs author*

Gawk! Ah! All Nintendo characters belong to their rightful and respected owners! I do not own any copyrighted materials used in this fanfiction. Malaria, Althaia, and Samyatang are my own creations. John Johnson is not my character; it was made by another creator YEARS ago, so I give them credit as well.

*handcuffs break* Yes! I'm free like macro yak!

Everyone: *gets sent to the Realm of Fiction* AAHHHHH!

Our nine heroes brutally landed in the House of the Dreaded Cousins (?), some bashing their skulls on hard furniture, (General Roy, Princess Baby Daisy) some brutally face planting into the floor, (Random Malaria, Young Link,) with some getting thwacked in the face with the ceiling fan, (Princess Baby Peach, Prince Marth) and some falling on they're backside, (Princess Daisy) and some floating safely to the couch. (Princess Peach, Gothic Althaia.) "Oh ho, ohhhh!" Baby Princess Daisy wailed as she placed her hands on her throbbing head. "Jeez… Yeesh, that smarts…" General Roy said as he massaged his aching forehead. "My face, oh my beautiful face!" Random Malaria wailed as she rubbed her face. Young Link groaned as he shook his head, and rubbed his sore face. "Oh-a no-a!" Baby Princess Peach screamed as she then fell from the screen and into the floor, effectively getting a Game Over Screen. Prince Marth was effectively knocked out, with swirls in his eyes. "Ow my rear end! OUCH!" Princess Daisy rubbed her backside, whimpering in pain. Princess Peach and Gothic Althaia just looked at each other and shrugged. "I feel perfectly fine," Peach exclaimed. "Hm. Me too." Althaia said. "NO ONE CARES!" Roy wailed as he then began to cry out of nowhere from the immense pain. And soon, more characters started crying and flailing about because of the pain. "Sheesh…You guys can be such babies," Althaia commented as she crossed her arms. "I mean, you videogame characters get sliced and diced by menacing forces in your respective titles, and not one tear was shed." Young Link whimpered as he wiped a tear from his sea blue eyes, "T-that's because it doesn't hurt for so long…When we get a Game Over Screen, everything feels f-fine. B-b-but now, it just hurts so badly!" he then began to bawl with tears rolling down his face. "I think I broke my BUTT!" Daisy screamed as she covered her face and wailed. "Okay, I need some Pepsi so I can—ouch, heal everyone…" Malaria said as she groggily stood to her feet. "OR, I could whip up a healing potion for everyone." Althaia exclaimed. "Yeah, yeah you do that," Malaria replied dizzily as she fell back on her back. "What?! A potion?! Do you know what effect potion could have on our coding?!" Baby Daisy retorted as she placed her hands on her hips. "Now, now," Althaia started as she wagged her right index finger, "It won't effect your coding. You aren't effected by coding when you're in The Real World. You're just as vulnerable to things to us. I'll get the healing potion." Althaia then said as she was about to walk off. "If you guys decide to follow me, DON'T TOUCH ANY OF MY CONCOCTIONS." Althaia exclaimed, as she then went off to her bedroom. "So that girl specializes in potions? Wow, I actually did not see that coming," Roy said as he folded his arms and shook his head. "Yeah. This fanfiction has weird things going on all the time, so you won't know what to expect." Baby Daisy stated. "Cool! Hey, I think I wanna check out some of those potions!" Daisy exclaimed, as she fist-pumped. "Maybe, maybe not. I tried my sister's potions on many occasions and suffered the consequences." Malaria admitted. "What kinda consequences?" Baby Daisy asked curiously. "Well…" Malaria started.

-FLASHBACK-

_Malaria was carefully watching Althaia brew a potion, who was now chanting some weird things. "Say, Althaia… What'll happen if I drink ALL these potions at once?" she then asked. Althaia turned to face Malaria. "Cousin, if you drink all of them, you-"Althaia was then cut off by the sound of "GULP GURLP PRUBLURPACURLP MECHAGURLPABURLPSCURBAPIKACHURLUP!" Malaria then drank all of the potions at once. "J-j-jeez, I feel crazy DERP!" Her feet then turned into tires and her backside turned into an engine as she zipped across the room faster than lightning, knocking precious ingredients onto the floor. She then tripped and turned into an elephant, a circus with a bunch of little Malarias on the trapeze, a whale, a tuba, a hot air balloon, a toaster, a computer, a giant pretzel, an anthill with little ants with Malaria's head, a television, and then she landed smack on her face. She then groaned in immense pain, sitting up and rubbing her face. "Gee, I'm glad that's over…" Malaria said. "You may think it's all over. Just take this darn potion," Althaia said whilst giving her the pinkish-colored beverage inside of a glass bottle labeled "antidote". As Malaria put the bottle in her hands, she then leaped in the air, and exploded into Malaria-themed fireworks all across the potion shrine. After about thirty seconds of fireworks, Malaria swirled around and landed on her face. "I better drink this before it gets worst," Malaria said as she pulled the cork off the antidote, gulping down the pink substance. "Tastes like cherry-marshmallow fusion," Malaria commented and drank the rest of the antidote. "The antidote does have minor side effects, so…yeah. I'm not responsible on what effect it could have on you." Althaia stated. Suddenly, Malaria burped loudly with bubbles coming out of her mouth right in Althaia's face, who groaned in annoyance. "Eh, sorry…" Malaria said as she then let out a deep-pitched poot with bubbles coming out. Malaria chuckled nervously, as Althaia pointed towards the door with her left index finger. "GET OUT." Althaia said, sending Malaria out of the room. Little did Althaia know that Malaria's side effects would destroy their beloved home. _

-END FLASHBACK-

"…On second thought, maybe I don't want to try those potions." Daisy said. "Good choice, smart princess." Malaria stated. "The healing potion is finished," Althaia said as she stepped into the room, holding a yellow-colored powder inside of a glass jar. She then poured a generous portion of the powder into her palm. She then stepped forward in front of the others, and then blew the powder as it swirled in a circular motion around everyone. The powder then cured everyone's pain from the falls they took. "Hey, that kinda tickled," Daisy said. "The more and more I think about it, the more and more I realize that healing antidote was just a pastime until the author had more ideas," Baby Daisy stated. "Hm. Yeah. True that." Young Link said. Marth groaned as he stood groggily to his feet, feeling very off-balance. He then wobbled as his eyes widened, throwing his arms backwards and then stumbling forwards, and gasping as he nearly toppled over, as Althaia sidestepped away from him to avoid being crushed. Marth then lost his balance, falling straight into the edge of the coffee table, causing a vase to be seesawed into the air, breaking it into a million pieces. "You know, that was so uncalled for. That was SO uncalled for." Princess Peach Toadstool stated as she placed her hands on her hips, looking in Marth's direction. "And it was so uncalled for you to use your heart farts on me while I was unconscious," Marth retorted as he then lifted himself off the ground with his hands. "Touché." Peach said as she closed her eyes. "Wait a minute—WHAT?! I never did that!" Peach exclaimed as she flailed her arms about frantically. "Yes, you did. I mean, you've done it to several other characters in separate fanfictions," Marth then pointed out, as he closed his eyes and adjusted his tiara. "And besides, you stated that's your way of flirting with people you like. Honestly, I feel sorry for Mario." "EGAD!" everyone in the room exclaimed, except for Peach and Marth. Peach then gasped as she blushed, covering her mouth with both hands. "How COULD you?! How could you go and publicly humiliate me like that?! You have NO idea how embarrassing this is to me!" she said as her lips trembled and tears quickly filled her eyes, sobbing as tears of waterfalls gushed out of her eyes. Marth scoffed as he folded his arms. "Quit your childish blubbering. It only makes you more annoying than you already are." Marth said. Roy then burst out laughing out of nowhere, falling out of his chair, slamming into the ground banging the floor with his fist multiple times. "Haha hah ha—heart farts—haha ha hee ho ha honk!" Roy then began to literally roll on the floor laughing. Princess Daisy then closed both eyes and placed her left hand on her forehead, and shook her head in disbelief. "Jeez, that is colder than a blizzard, Marth…" she then said. "Then again, why the heck would Peach fart hearts…?" Needless to say, in a matter of seconds, Daisy found herself alongside Roy, laughing really hard. Peach was still crying her eyes out. Baby Peach then burst in through the front door, panting as she doubled over, placing her hands on her knees. "Whew…man, you guys don't know how hard it was to get here after getting a Game Over Screen," she exclaimed as she wiped the sweat off her forehead. "You were gone? Hm, didn't notice." Althaia said. "That's-a because people-a like to label me as a filler-a character. It's-a not fair-a!" Baby Peach wailed as she flailed her arms. All of a sudden, they heard slight chattering from the kitchen. Roy and Daisy immediately stopped laughing, and everyone was alarmed, except for Peach, who was still crying. Baby Peach gritted her teeth and then growled, dashing across the room in a matter of seconds then grabbed Peach by her collar, causing her to fall on her knees, and then Baby Peach slapped Peach across the face with a thick yellow rubber glove. "Shut up!" Baby Peach said, as she covered Peach's mouth. Peach whimpered as tears rolled down her face. "I'll go check it out," Malaria said. "I'll go with you." Daisy and Roy said, giving each other awkward glances, and simply shook it off. The three looked into the kitchen, to see shadows. Malaria gestured to be quiet at Roy and Daisy. "You Think They'll Notice Us?" an echoing, soft spoken, motherly like voice spoke quietly. "I don't think so." A deep-pitched man's voice spoke. "I'm starving," a scratchy voice spoke. In a couple of seconds, the three heard voices were revealed to be Princess Rosalina, Ike, and Blue Cat Suit Toad. "What?" Malaria, Roy and Daisy then quietly said to each other. "But I Don't Understand," Rosalina started. "Why Do We Have To Sneak Around In Here And Steal Food? We Know That The Others Are Here, Anyway…" "It's for _dramatic effect_," Toad said as he lowered his eyes. "Eh…Um…what he said." Ike said sheepishly scratching the back of his head. "Ah, forget dramatic effect! I'm hungry!" Toad said as he flailed his arms. "Shhh! OK, OK, everyone keep calm." Ike said, as he slowly opened the refrigerator door, when suddenly… "THIEVES!" Malaria cried as she then flew into the room with a drop kick, kicking Ike in the side of his head, causing him to fall over, effectively knocking him out. Daisy and Roy looked at each other and sighed, both leaving the scene because it had already gotten too random for them. Rosalina screamed as she then formed a barrier around herself and Toad. Malaria then stood up to her feet, and charged towards Rosalina and Toad, as she exclaimed, "You want some of this too! Well, here I—OAWH!" Malaria said as she ran face-first into the barrier, being reflected backwards and recoiling, knocking over several pots and pans. "Awh, seriously? That's just unfair! A thief using a barrier? C'mon!" Malaria said. "So, you're not gonna rip off our heads, or brutally injure us?" Toad asked. "Why would I do that? Anyway, why are you guys just creeping around here?" Malaria asked, placing her hands on her hips. "Well, You See…Me And Toad Were Just On An Adventure To Save The Sprixie Princesses From Bowser. And Then We Got Sucked In Some Weird Vortex Thingamajig And We Ended Up Here. Ike Had Pretty Much The Same Thing Happen To Him." Rosalina said. She then dispelled the barrier. "W-w-wait…Did you say…you were with Toad…?" Malaria said as her left eye twitched. "Yup, that's me!" Toad said. "Can you please take the cat suit off?" Malaria said. "What suit?" Toad said. "If you won't take it off, I'll MAKE YOU TAKE IT OFF!" Malaria yelled as she threw a hammer at Toad, as Toad gawked, ducking down. "Hey, what's wrong with you!?" Toad said, as he frowned and folded his arms. Malaria then threw a bottle of water at Toad, hitting him in the face. "Ouch! Oh, you big meanie!" Toad exclaimed angrily as he waved his left fist whilst frowning. "Why won't his suit go away?!" Malaria screamed in sheer fear. "Duh, real-world physics. That suit is not going to come off since they're not in the games they came from right now. If it DID come off …well, he'd be in his birthday suit." Althaia said. "I don't like people abusing me, you psycho! Oh, you're gonna get it now! Meow!" Toad then leaped in the air and pounced at Malaria, who yelled, scratching her ferociously. Malaria then screamed as Toad and her toppled down the stairs in the basement, as the door shut somehow. Althaia and Rosalina heard Malaria screaming and agonizing, as well as hearing Toad hissing at Malaria. Althaia and Rosalina looked at each other, both looking frightened and creeped out. After like two minutes, Malaria reached out of the basement and screamed "Help me! Elp me elp me!" Malaria screamed. "Oh, I'm not done with you yet!" Toad said as Malaria screamed, being dragged back down the steps. Ike then regained his consciousness, groaning as he rubbed the side of his head. "Oh, what happened…?" Ike said. "My cousin thought you were a burglar, so she gave you the ol' one-two." Althaia said. "Ike, Are You Okay?" Rosalina commented worriedly as she helped him up. "Yes, I'm fine…hey, where is Toad?" Ike asked. Rosalina then pointed her right index finger towards the basement door as she closed her eyes. "He's In The Basement Scratching The Living Crabbage Out Of That Blue-Haired Little Girl…" Rosalina stated. An awkward silence filled the room, aside from Toad and Malaria's rendezvous. "Uh…is that so?" Ike said as he scratched the back of his head. "Yes. They've Been At It For Like Four Minutes Now…" Rosalina said. "You know, this is starting to sound wrong in many different ways…" Althaia said. "Yes, Yes It Is." Rosalina admitted. "Rosalina, why do you have to talk by capitalizing the start of each word?" Althaia asked. "Because Everything I Say Is Very Meaningful." Rosalina said. "Can you stop talking meaningful? You're making Microsoft Word have green underlines too much, and that can be uncomfortable." Althaia said. "Oh, yes, of course." Rosalina said. "Well, now that you're here, you guys might want to go see your other fictional friends?" Althaia asked.

Althaia, Rosalina and Ike headed back to the living room, where everyone was. Everyone seemed to be in tact, except for Baby Peach, who was slapping Marth across the face merciless. Rosalina gasped as she dropped her wand on the floor, dashing up to Baby Peach who seemed to be loosing her sanity. "No no no, little one," Rosalina exclaimed as she grabbed Baby Peach by her waist, as Baby Peach was still swinging at Marth. "Let me at 'em! Let me at 'em!" Baby Peach yelled. Rosalina shushed Baby Peach, who only growled in response. "Manners like those deserve a time out," Rosalina said as she wagged her left index finger and shook her head. "Oh gosh—no! Not Rosabinga…" Baby Peach said as her eyes narrowed. "Wait…Rosa…binga…? What?" Rosalina said. "Rosalina, you eat too many beans. Just sayin'." Baby Peach said. "Agh! Who taught her that?!" Rosalina exclaimed as she put Baby Peach on the floor. "Well, well. If it isn't Rosalina…" Princess Peach said. Rosalina gasped. "Oh! Princess Peach. How odd; meeting someone like yourself here." Rosalina said. "Hey, Rosalina, have you got over your farting problem yet?" Peach asked. Rosalina gasped as she stumped, folding her arms. "Listen, I know you're alone when it comes to those sort of things, but don't pin them on other people just because you want some reassurance," Rosalina retorted as she frowned and pointed at Peach with her right index finger. "Oh my, but Rosalina, you know that wasn't what I was getting at…this time." Peach said. "Hey you GUYS!" Daisy then gleefully popped in the middle between Rosalina and Peach. No response from either Peach or Rosalina. "I said hey you GUYS!" Daisy said. "You've come to the wrong place to talk with guys," Rosalina said. "Daisy is so obnoxious, isn't she? She cares not about being loud, mouthy or just plain rude. For the love of Power Stars, Daisy, refer to us as girls!" Peach said as she placed her hands on hips. "Hey you GIRLS!" Daisy then gleefully popped in the middle between Rosalina and Peach. "Oh, hello there." Rosalina said. "So what's up?" Daisy said. "Um…the sky." Peach said. Suddenly, Malaria screamed to the top of her lungs. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEAHIIIIIIIAHHHHAAAAAA! AHHAHHIIIIIIAIAAAAY! WHAA! WHAAA! WHAAAAAAAAAA!" Malaria screamed as she ran into the living room. "Whoa, what the foo is wrong with you?!" Althaia said to Malaria, who was running like crazy. "Help ME! Help me! AHH!" Malaria said. "Calm down!" Althaia said. "YOU! COME BACK HERE!" Toad screamed angrily, as he spotted Malaria. Malaria screamed as she jumped on Althaia's shoulders. "Ooh, get down from there!" Toad screamed. "Althaia, HELP me!" Malaria screamed. "What? No! You got yourself into this mess, get yourself out!" Althaia said angrily. "Althaia no—no, I'm serious! PLEASE, get him to STAHP! I don't wanna get scratched to ribbons!" Malaria said. "Oh, you're gonna meet with a fate far worst than ribbons!" Toad said. "See?! That devilish mushroom is making death threats at me!" Malaria whispered to Althaia, as the two then wobbled. "You need to handle this yourself!" Althaia said. "Please tell him to buzz off or something!" Malaria cried. "…Toad, buzz off." Althaia said with no sincerity whatsoever. "HECK no!" Toad then said in response as he hissed, as Althaia and Malaria both gasped in disbelief. "Dat sass…" Althaia said. "Dude, man, for reals, I'm sorry man! Ceasefire! Armistice! Truce! Treaty! Respite! Peace! Lull… You can keep your cat suit. I mean, your cat suit is amazing and I should have never tried to make you to take it off. Please forgive me." Malaria said as she jumped off of Althaia's shoulders and bowed down to Toad. "I'll ONLY forgive if you are my 24/7 slave." Toad says. "What?! No. Hogwash! Are you out of your head? IF I became your slave, you'd see the qualities in my femininity and gain love attractions towards me, making the author make a rated M fanfiction about it." Malaria said. "Wow. She actually said something that made sense." Althaia said. "Hm. True. But it's still not good enough!" Toad exclaimed angrily as he frowned. "Bro, whadda HECK want from me?!" Malaria said as she folded her cloaked arms. "I want you to be my 24/7 slave, or else, I'll have to scratch you to pieces!" Toad said as he raised his paws, as his retractable claws then gleamed in the light. "Oh yeah? COME AT ME BRO!" Malaria exclaimed as she got in a fighting pose. "Oh, you wanna fight? Mew!" Toad said as he then charged at Malaria. As Toad then ran at Malaria, she then screamed, "TIME OUT!" as Toad then stopped. "I gotta tie my shoes," Malaria said as she bent down and tied her shoes. "Okay GO!" Malaria said. In a matter of seconds, Toad scratched Malaria like crazy. "Ouch, OW! AH, OW OUCH!" Malaria said as she was getting scratched like crazy. "You asked for it!" Toad said as he continued to scratch Malaria. "STOP! STOP! YAHAAHHAHAHAAHHAHA!" Malaria then ran out of the front door.

The two blue-clad fictional characters were now outside, with Toad pretty much eliminating Malaria who was now being helplessly abused like a rag doll. There wasn't much more the blue-clad Randomian could take. But when she thought about it, she was being scratched helplessly by a cat, which is her most disliked animal for several reasons, and a mushroom, which is her most hated vegetable. Getting enraged, Malaria then screamed to the top of her lungs, "YEEEAAAH I'm not gonna let you do that." Turning the tables, Malaria then quickly reached for her trusted blade, Ukulele. She then blocked all of Toad's attacks at an inhuman pace, even fancily twirling the blade in several fashions to dodge his attacks. And soon, Malaria grinned and a freeze of the moment then happened. "You're open," Malaria calmly stated as she jabbed Toad smack-dab in the gut before he could react with the handle of her sword backwards. Malaria then used some of her magical Author-inherited powers as she pressed a newly-built one-time-only switch on the handle of her sword, Ukulele, causing it to form into small light blue orbs in a circular motion and form into the giant ranger weapon, the Guilty Light. She then pinned the Guilty Light directly to Toad's forehead. "YOU'RE DONE SON!" Malaria yelled as she grinned mischievously. "Any last words?" Malaria then commented as she placed her hand on the trigger. "W….Whyyy?!" Toad then cried. "OK, OK! I give up! You win! This is over!" Toad exclaimed as he panicked and flailed his arms about frantically. "Really?" Malaria said, as she was getting ready to put the Guilty Light away. "Yeah! We're close to the final pages of this chapter! Why don't we just wrap it up from here?! I don't wanna die!" Toad commented. Malaria realized that the humanoid mushroom was right. "Oh yeah, you're right." Malaria replied, "I guess we should head for the house." The two blue-clad characters then headed back inside the house, greeted with a scene that would have been funny if Princess Daisy hadn't looked so sad. "Face it, Daisy. You won't be in Super Smash Brothers for the Wii U and 3DS." Princess Peach Toadstool commented as Daisy pouted and folded her arms. "The only way you'll even have a slight chance is if you get into a new Mario mainstream game before it comes out in Summer on the 3DS." Rosalina added. "LYING! I DON'T WANNA HEAR IT! LYING LYING LYING LIARS!" Daisy yelled out loud, with Peach and Rosalina sighing and shaking their heads, annoyed by Daisy's level of immaturity. "WHAT is this?!" Malaria then shouted as she frowned and crossed her arms. "We're making sure that Princess Daisy is prepared not to be in the new Super Smash Bros." Rosalina commented. "And just who the FOO told you she AIN'T gonna be in the new Smash!?" Malaria then retorted as she was now becoming more annoyed by the minute. Before Rosalina could reply to Malaria's question, Malaria noticed that Marth and Ike were telling Roy the same thing. "I'm telling you Roy; don't get your hopes up. We all know that Chrom might join the battle-" "Chrom…." Baby Peach muttered in a charmed tone of voice with her hands clasped together and with big red hearts in her eyes. "…Like I was saying, we all know that Chrom has a high chance of joining the battle, and it's not very likely that we even get three Fire Emblem representatives this time around." Ike then stated. "Then whose to say _YOU _even have a chance at being in, Ike?!" Roy then stood out of his seat and scowled at Ike, pointing his right index finger directly at Ike, who raised both hands up with a sweat drop on the side of his head. "Well, I'm not certain that I'm going to be added, but we know for sure all four of us aren't going to be added to Smash Bros. four." Ike said. "It's CALLED SMASH BROS. FOUR! WHY CAN'T IT JUST BE FOUR REPRESENTATIVES FROM EACH SERIES?!" Roy yelled. "Because Game & Watch doesn't have four representatives." Marth then added as he adjusted his tiara. "Neither does F-Zero, or Metroid." Ike added. "Ridley for SSB4!" Althaia then said with a "We want Ridley!" poster above her head. "No, he's too big for SSB4. Just imagine Ridley fighting alongside Pikachu. It'd be weird." Ike commented. "Imagine Rosalina fighting alongside Pikachu. It'd be weird." Althaia said as she lowered her eyes with a grin on her face. "Hm. Touché." Ike said. "What about ME in SSB4?!" Toad exclaimed. "I'm sorry, who are you again?" Roy commented sarcastically as he then scoffed. "Peach is using you as a shield, remember?" Rosalina said. "That's not ME! I don't want to meet with a terrible fate like that! That's Chad who she's using a shield!" Toad exclaimed. "I just hope every fictional character in this fanfiction gets added to SSB4!" Malaria exclaimed cheerfully. "Um, knock knock! Baby Daisy says hello." Roy said as he folded his arms.

"I didn't say no STINKIN' HELLO! STOP CRAMMING DEM DANG WORDS IN MA MOUTH!" Baby Daisy exclaimed angrily at Roy, who beared a smug grin on his face. "Oh, whatever! Can't you guys just stay on the positive side? Is that TOO much to ask? You guys sound like conspiracy theorists!" Malaria exclaimed as she frowned and folded her arms. "Yeah, seriously! Who cares! Smash Bros is just an overhyped and overrated beauty pageant! Who actually wants to be in that game?!" Baby Daisy exclaimed and threw her hands in the air. "Just shut it Baby Daisy!" Roy and Daisy both yelled at Baby Daisy, who slowly walked into one of the many corners. "O hummye bunny lotta choca…" someone then chanted, causing our twelve heroes to stand on guard and get into various fighting positions. Kinda like from those cheesy Saturday morning cartoon intros. "WHOOSHKABOBO!" a voice said as the discolored Baby Daisy who we know as Samyatang then appeared above the coffee table and then landed on it. "Hello my human and humanoid companions. I sense your need to leave this dreaded chapter…" Samyatang then spoke. "Yes! Get me outta here! Everyone wants to speculate the chances in SSB4. That's when things get radical!" Malaria exclaimed. "Super Smash Bros 4? Oh, that game is so overrated." Samyatang stated as she rolled her eyes. "Preach sista!" Baby Daisy exclaimed as she leaped out of the corner and gave Samyatang a high-five. "Well, if you wish to get out, find the plothole." Samyatang said. "I'm actually useful for this part! Yes! YEAH!" Baby Peach exclaimed as she fist-pumped with both eyes closed, her sudden tomboyish behavior making her seem out-of-character. Peach then gave an awkward glance at her baby counterpart. "Baby Peach, you're making me look bad!" Peach then whispered to Baby Peach. "Who are you again, lady?" Baby Peach said as she took off her crown and scratched her messy yellow hair. "Anyway, yeah, the plothole. When Rosalina, Ike and Toad showed up, we heard them even though they were whispering. Not to mention that we didn't even notice when they appeared from the TV set." Baby Peach said as she placed her crown back on. "Wow, she's smart." Samyatang said. "O hummye bunny pencak silat lotta choca… O hummye bunny cocoa kwispie tweets… Boom-ada-bob-o!" Samyatang then opened the Plot Hole. "Well, I'll be seeing ya. Farewell!" Samyatang exclaimed. Our twelve heroes then got materialized and sucked into the plothole.

A/N: Kawaii Pinkberry: Hai everybody! How'd you enjoy that chapter? Not as humorous as the last chapters, though, huh? Well, this isn't all. I'm going to be working on another chapter soon. Just to let you know, it hasn't even been a day yet in what timeline their in. This chapter concluded at 5:30 on the following day the incident happened. The next chapter will be _**Night of the First Day: 62 Hours Remain. **_What's going to happen on the third day, you ask? You'll see. There might be one chapter for the night (I plan on it to be a pretty long chapter) and two during the second day. The third chapter will probably be at 7:00 p.m or earlier on the second day. On the third day, there will be four chapters during the day and two at night, since it's going to be the finale of this fanfiction. But that's going to actually be a ways from now, so no worries ^-^ This is going to be a 14-chapter long fanfiction, and most of the chapters are pretty long. And it's going to have a proper ending. And there might be a bit more toilet humor for this fanfiction…so bear with me, please. And also, after the seventh chapter, there will be a commercial break which will be at least five pages long. And after the fourteenth chapter, there will be a blooper chapter.

Twelve Heroes: *materializes in*

Malaria: Hey!

Althaia: Yo.

Marth: Konichiwa.

Roy: Konichiwa!

Ike: Hello.

Peach: Hi!

Daisy: Hi I'm Daisy!

Rosalina: Hi there!

Toad: Hai!

Baby Peach: Haaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiya!

Baby Daisy: Hai everybody!

Young Link: Hey.

Whoa, quite a crowd now. This writing office is pretty cramped.

Malaria: Totally. Remember when it was just me, Althaia, Roy, Young Link, Marth, Daisy and Peach?

Yep. Seven heroes. Dem days are ogre now.

Althaia: Good times. Gooooood times.

Peach: Ha-tchaa!

Baby Daisy: #UpWithTheFootAttacks #DownWithTheHipAttacks

QUICK! SAY/DO SOMETHING QUOTABLE! YOU COULD WIN UP TO A HUNDRED BILLION DOLLARS!

Marth: Hey everybody, look at me!

Roy: For those who I protect…I will not lose!

Ike: I fight for my friends.

Peach: *dances* Lalalalala~

Rosalina: Hello there! All set!

Daisy: *twirls* Hay hay! Haha!

Baby Peach: Let's go!

Baby Daisy: Go go go!

Young Link: *drinks a bottle of milk*

Toad: Wahahaha! I'm the best!

Malaria: *does a drop kick* FEET LOAF!

Althaia: Die the death of butter beans.

That was….useless!

Roy:…

Okay, now I'm just bored. Goodbye….people of the fanfiction place thingamajiba.

Baby Daisy: ….

GOODBYE, OLD BEAN! Read and review please xD Oh, and also, Princess Daisy, Roy, Young Link, Baby Daisy, and Ike for SSB4! :D


	5. Please, This Isn't Scary At All

Kawaii-Pinkberry: Hai everybody! It's me, Kawaii-Pinkberry! I'm back, and I'm writing another awesome (hopefully) chapter of _The Misadventures of Malaria and Althaia: The Smashers Visit! _…which I'm going to start abbreviating as TMoMaA: TSV for less words. I'm feeling pretty inspired tonight, so maybe I won't hit any blocks with this one.

Also I'm going to try to use more detail when making things happen. Kind of an update to this fanfiction. In addition to this update, Marth and Roy uses super-enhanced translating devices so everyone can understand them that connect to the super-enhanced translator devices that the non-Japanese speakers have, and same goes with Young Link, since he speaks Hylian. The Author's Notes will still be pretty long, so bear with me! Also this chapter is the bit on the creepy side, because it's something I always wanted to do. But it will be a right mixture of creepy and humorous (bear in mind that humor means toilet and/or slapstick humor.) I'll see if it's necessary to add a 13th character to this fanfiction as I'm writing it. Don't you all think twelve characters are quite enough?

Roy: (English Subtitles): Um… twelve characters aren't enough!

Daisy: I agree!

So you guys want more characters?

Young Link (English Subtitles): YES!

Rosalina: I think more characters means more fun.

Marth: *is asleep*

Peach: I am totally bored!

Baby Peach: Yeesh, then go play hockey or somethin'!

Baby Daisy: Hockey? Seriously? BP, everyone knows that curling is, like, totes better than hockey! Aren't you even IN?

Toad: Forget hockey and curling, bobsleighing is 10x times better than both!

.-.

Roy: What does that mean?

Malaria: It means that I am no pesky plumber!

Ike: Pardon my HUH?!

Malaria: Obey me. Obey me, my child! Wahaha!

Althaia: …

Everybody knows that I have a samgyetang in my house!

Marth: *wakes up* this fanfiction loses me all the time.

Rosalina: Is that what you wake up thinking about?

Marth: I've fell asleep three times already, and it just turned night.

Althaia: Cranky old people need their sleep.

Marth: I choose not to reply.

Young Link: I just realized my name rhymes with stink…

Roy: Took ya long enough. I know everything that rhymes with my name.

Malaria: Boy, coy, soy, toy, joy, etc.

Toad: My name rhymes with…boat!

Everyone: WAT.

Peach: That was half-thought.

Daisy: Why does everyone think that I ALWAYS do that Hi I'm Daisy thing?! I don't say it ALL the time.

Rosalina: Wait, you don't. Strange, I didn't notice.

Daisy: *puts on sunglasses*

Rosalina: …

Althaia: Hi I'm Althaia. Yeah, I rarely say that.

Malaria: Holy soy sauce peeps! I think there's a rogue in the foyer!

Roy: wutnut

Waluigi: WAAA-luigi time!

Daisy: Waluigi isn't in this fanfiction, remember?

Oh. Mmkay. We're spamming the Author's Notes again, so START IT!

_**Night of the First Day (62 Hours remain)**_

It was a surprisingly beautiful night in the random area that is Random Valley #1234, which was actually calm. No Random Dudes or Merry Poppins rip-offs roaming the streets, being actually a peaceful night in the random valley. Hundreds of bright stars filled the deep, night blue sky, making quite the scenery. The weather was quite lovely-not too hot, not too cold; it was the perfect summer night. It was a perfect night for an evening picnic, a stroll in the park, or proposing to that special someone. Even in a place where peace is not a common pleasure, the night atmosphere was even contagious to THAT place; THE place, none other than the House of the Dreaded Cousins (?). However, enjoying the night's pleasure wasn't the activity that our twelve heroes were enjoying…

"Who are they? What are they, and what is their purposes in our little world are?" a somewhat low-pitched, heartless, monotone voice spoke. "No one knows. No one knows what these demonic beings want with our people. Maybe for coldhearted possession, disasters opon one human being, or for a matter our society cannot cope with," she read from the book's texts. "_Whatever you do, _said Crests. _Do not let these children into your house. From several cases, I've learned that these children are omens, _continued Crests. Quoted again for significance, do not let these children into your home. Only shame and heartache spawn from these entities' presence." she continued to read from the book, now with most of the other fictional characters on the edge of their seats. "Here are some frequently asked questions, and some tips of what NOT to do when you encounter one. Question No. 1: How likely will I have an encounter with one of these beings? Answer: The chances are thin. One out of 10 cases says that these entities will appear at your doorstep. Question No. 2: Is there a direct way to prevent one of these encounters? Answer: As of late, no. Question No. 3: Is there a well-known hotspot for these entities? Answer: Studies say that the most common place to find these creatures is in Portland Oregon. Question No. 4: Am I vulnerable to them anywhere? Answer: These can be found just about anywhere; knocking at your home, your hotel room, on your car door, and in some cases outside of your tent." Althaia then spoke out. Althaia then swiftly closed the book with a THUD that made just about everyone aside from herself flinch and (or) gasp the moment she did from their apparent tenseness from hearing so many shocking facts about the creatures the book was dedicated to. "That's all, folks. We'll save the rest for a rainy day…" Althaia said as she placed the book on an end table next to her armchair. "T-that was terrifying!" Princess Peach commented in fear, closing her eyes and shaking her head. "I'm not the one to get scared easily, but I must admit, this was a bit disturbing." Ike spoke up. "Are you serious, black-eyed children? Puh-lease. What's so scary about children with black eyes?" Roy commented as he folded his arms and grinned. "I must admit; how unobservant you are humors me. BEKs are nothing to jeer at, for your information." Althaia remarked as she got out of her chair. "One thing that I still don't get…what do the BEKs exactly do when they get in your house?" Rosalina asked curiously. "Well, if anybody's up for it, I can show you the ten-minute video online." Althaia replied. "That shows you one of the things that BEKs do when they get in your house. "I guess that'd be interesting." Marth said.

Our twelve heroes were now sitting in the game room, watching the video.

_CONTENT BLOCKED BY THE AUTHOR. THIS VIDEO CONTAINED NIGHTMARE-INDUCING MATERIAL, THEREFORE THAT IT IS NOT SAFE FOR THE VIEWERS OF THIS FANFICTION TO READ_

"I still can't get over the fact that the girl is named after me!" Princess Daisy commented.

"Tell her to use something other than Photoshop." Roy remarked, as Rosalina then nudged him with a dull look on her face. "Not nice!" Rosalina exclaimed as she frowned. "Alright, jeez! Keep your elbows to yourself, wouldja?" Roy commented. "Well, look who's not going to sleep tonight…" Malaria then said as she chuckled sheepishly. "You never do sleep at night anyway, Malaria…" Althaia pointed out. "Whoa…Just…WHAO!" Baby Daisy screamed in horror. "Well, it's not the worst of what could have happened to that Daisy girl, right?" Baby Peach commented. Marth was actually asleep for the fourth time in this fanfiction. "I'm guessing Marth's actually down for the count." Young Link said. "I know he wanted to crash since he got here," Malaria commented as she folded her arms and nodded her head. "Well, I guess I should go get that—LOTSA spaghetti—that I promised you all." Althaia said. "Yeah, I am famished." Roy said. Althaia then headed to the kitchen, and opened the refrigerator. There was a small desert cactus, some dried up garlic, and a can of ghost peppers in the refrigerator. "Whoa-oh." Althaia said as she scratched her head. She then suddenly opened all of the cupboards, and there was nothing but cobwebs and cobweb that looked exactly like tumbleweeds. "Yeesh!" Althaia exclaimed. Althaia then went to the living room as she scratched her head. "Man, I could have sworn we had LOTSA spaghetti in there…" Althaia said to herself. "Looks like we've got a problem. There seems to be no LOTSA spaghetti." Althaia said sheepishly. "WHAT?!" everyone exclaimed. "B-but you promised!" Rosalina exclaimed as she clasped her hands together. "I know, but…we haven't got any LOTSA spaghetti." Althaia commented as she shrugged. "Well," Malaria started. "Looks like we have to go buy LOTSA spaghetti…" Malaria commented disappointedly. "Uh, who is WE?! I for sure ain't going out there!" Toad exclaimed. "Why not?" Malaria said. "After hearing about those BEKs, no way!" Toad exclaimed as he shook his head. "Let's play spin-the-bottle to determine who should go buy LOTSA spaghetti?" Malaria suggested to the ten heroes (except for Marth, who was sleep). "Isn't spin-the-bottle some sort of love game?" Ike asked. "Well, usually, yes, but we'll just spin the bottle to see who it lands on. Whoever it lands on will have to buy the LOTSA spaghetti. Sound like a plan?" Malaria said. "Uh, sure, why not?" Daisy said.

Our eleven heroes (Marth not included since he was asleep) where sitting in a circular formation with the bottle in the middle. "O Great Lord Bujymn, spin the Bottle of Fortune…" Malaria chanted with her eyes closed and sitting Indian-style. "Wait, is this the way spin-the-bottle works?" Rosalina whispered to Peach, who was sitting next to her. "This sure isn't the way I play spin-the-bottle…" Peach replied to Rosalina. "I hope she isn't trying to contact any entities," Daisy whispered to both Peach and Rosalina. Suddenly, the bottle started to spin at an incredibly fast pace. A various number of characters starting looking at each other and shrugging and asking questions to each other. And after at least thirty seconds, the bottle then came to an abrupt stop, landing in Roy's direction. Roy then gawked at the bottle as he was completely bewildered; he couldn't even think straight. "Then it's settled! Roy the Fearless is going to get the spaghetti for us all." Althaia commented as she clasped her hands together. "W…what? W-wait a minute! C-can't we spin the bottle again?!" Roy exclaimed as he then sweatdropped. "But I thought you weren't scared of BEKs," Althaia replied. "Yeah, General Roy, a fearsome and fearless soldier like you can't be backed down by some little black-eyed kids," Daisy commented as she sat up and then stood above Roy, placing her hands on his shoulders. "Well, actually, I… wait wait wait, no! I'm not scared of any black-eyed children!" Roy exclaimed as he threw his hands in the air. "Thing is, uh…w-what if I happen to become so hungry whilst traveling, I pass out and you guys wouldn't even know?" Roy asked as he then stood up. "What are the chances of that happening?" Althaia said as she folded her arms with a dull look on her pale face. "None outta a million, I'd say," Baby Daisy remarked as Roy then facepalmed. "What if I get lost? I mean, I don't even know what this place is called!" Roy exclaimed. And yes; Roy was right. He had never actually been outside of the House of the Dreaded Cousins (?). "Well he's right," said Althaia as she adjusted her small hat. "Either me or Malaria has to go with him." She says. "I'll go! I'll go!" Malaria then chimed happily. "NO. I GO. I WAS DESTINED TO GO." Althaia retorted as she sat up, and then scowled at Malaria who raised both arms up and yelped in fear. Everyone then looked at Althaia with disturbed looks on their faces. "Er…I meant, we'll both go." Althaia then said with a sheepish look on her face. "But one of us has to hold down the fort." Malaria said. "It's agreeable that they can get into more trouble outside of our house than inside our house." Althaia then replied. "True. Then we shall both go…" Malaria then commented. "I'll admit; I don't like staying in one place for long." Rosalina said. "Good to know." Althaia replied rather blandly. Rosalina then sighed with a dull look on her face. "What I meant is that I want to join along." Rosalina said. "Oh, okay. The more people, the better!" Malaria exclaimed. "Hey! Hey! I wanna go! I wanna go!" Daisy exclaimed as she jumped up and down. "Alright, yeesh! You can go, as long as you promise not to yell." Althaia said in annoyance. "Whaaaat? But yelling's half the fun!" Daisy whined rather childishly. "Well you can't come then." Althaia said. "Alright, fine…I won't yell…" Daisy muttered as she folded her arms and pouted. "I could use some exercise," Young Link commented as he stood up and stretched his arms. "So I guess I'll tag along." He said. "Hold down the fort for us, okay guys?" Althaia then said to the other five heroes. "I now declare that I am ruler of your home!" Peach proclaimed as she clasped her hands together. "…that is, temporarily." She said. "Uh…" Ike said sheepishly as he scratched his deep-blue hair. "Do not worry, Ike! You shall not succumb to my wrath!" Peach said with a high-and-mighty tone of voice, with Ike still feeling a bit nervous. "Yes, Queen Peach. Do not hesitate to invoke your wrath upon those who disobey you." Althaia said to Peach. "We shall now take our leave," Althaia said as she then bowed down to honor Peach. "Well guys, let's go." Althaia said, as the six heroes then went out through the front door in a line. "Peasants! Line up! Obey Queen Peach!" Peach then yelled. "Yes, your majesty!" Ike, Toad, Baby Peach and Baby Daisy then exclaimed as they got into a line and each individually bowed down, with Marth snoring rather loudly in his sleep. "Hey, is that a kitten in the ceiling…?" Marth muttered in his sleep, receiving awkward glares from the other five heroes.

Our momentarily six heroes where treading the solid, concrete sidewalks of Random Valley #1234, the natural light of the stars lighting their paths. "Don't you love how the narrator exaggerates the scenery so much," said Althaia. "I know right! Without these streetlights, we'd have to turn around!" Malaria added. Roy nodded in agreement. "Yeah. And at the very start of this chapter, the narrator says, and I quote, "no Random Dudes or Merry Poppins rip-offs roaming the streets." Actually…" Roy then pointed dead ahead of him, and lo and behold, there was two random dudes beating the crabbage out of one another, with another Merry Poppins rip-off flying around with her parasol while kicking the random dudes in the back aimlessly. "There isn't really a time where this place is stable, huh?" says Young Link. "No." Malaria then answered with a dull look on her face. "That's why they call it Random Valley #1234. It's a valley…and it's random." Rosalina said, her statement being true. "This isn't the only Random Valley. There's a whole bunch of Random Valleys scattered throughout the world," Malaria commented as she adjusted her red diamond brooch. Suddenly, a giant trail of neon rainbow light then flashed before our heroes and heroines eyes', causing them to be caught off guard. Everyone except for Malaria and Althaia started asking questions and making remarks, when Malaria then said "Aw, great. It's a perfect time for this to happen…" "Wait, you know what's going on?" Roy asked as his voice then cracked. As Malaria opened her mouth to say something, a loud, distinctive ringing noise then echoed across the valley street. A bright, glowing, neon rainbow-colored giraffe loomed, and then ran along the rainbow light. The heroes just watched it go by, when the majestic creature then did a reverse loop as it then ran towards the group, chasing them. Our six heroes screamed as they ran in fear from the giraffe, which wasn't going to be stopping in its rainbow tracks anytime soon. "What the heck is that thing?!" Young Link asked frantically as he kept running. "There's no time; I can't tell you! The main objective is to run!" Malaria yelled. They screamed, flailed, and made mad jumps and dips to avoid being flattened—or whatever threat the bizarrely mythical creature posed. They unwillingly ran into Old Man Grumpcles' backyard. Old Man Grumpcles himself was enjoying some leisure in his raft in his swimming pool, enjoying the summer sky. There was a big, duck-shaped raft at the front of the pool, where the heroes had met a dead end. This pool took up pretty much the majority of the backyard. Getting a bizarre idea, Althaia then snapped her gloved fingers together. "Aha! Guys, I know it's ridiculous, but let's get in this raft. We have to take a chance!" Althaia exclaimed. "What? Are you kidding me? We'll all sink, or worse, this thing will deflate!" Daisy tried to talk Althaia out of her hasty decision. "Trust me! We have to get across; we don't have another option!" Althaia said as she placed her hands on her hips. "She's right; we've got nothing to lose!" Roy said. Some against their will, everyone hopped into the yellow ducky raft. "Yeah, but how do we make it move?" Malaria asked. "We have to make paddles out of our hands! If all of us do this in rhythm, we can speed out of this thing! Now we've got to hurry before this thing gives out on us!" Althaia exclaimed. "Ew! I don't want to put my hands in this old man water!" Malaria said as she then closed her eyes and stuck her tongue out in disgust. "I hate to shatter the fourth wall for the umpteenth time, but this is your story, so if you didn't want to paddle in this water, we would have taken a different route. Now stop being such a priss and get those hands wet!" Althaia exclaimed sternly, now frowning at the blue-haired Randomian, causing everyone besides Malaria to be confused out of their wits. "Fine…you win this time!" Malaria exclaimed. They then began to paddle the raft with their hands through the large, lake-like pool. GGNRG (A/N: GGNRG; giant glowing neon rainbow giraffe) was hot on their trail too, treading rainbows along the water. "Paddle faster!" Althaia exclaimed, as they started going as fast as they could. "My hands are getting tired!" Daisy exclaimed. "We're almost at the end, so try your best to keep it up!" Malaria shouted to Daisy. Eventually, they came across Old Man Grumpcles, who had headphones in his ears. With so much speed, they paddled aside him, the current being just enough to cause him to spin and flip over and then go straight back up, causing him to yell and flail his arms as his sunglasses then tilted over his grumpy face. "HEY! Aw, dern yew meddlin' chillin!" he then yelled in his cranky, old, Country accent, as he balled his fist and frowned, waving his fist. Mumbling under his breathe, he then went back to reading his magazine, as the GGNRG then ran him over, causing him to howl in pain, as he sunk under the water. Popping back out, he then spit out water. "HEY! WHAT IN THE HAY BELLS?! For the luvva Pete-AWH, CHARLIE HORSE!" he screamed as he then got a cramp in his leg, causing him to sink under once again. Life Alert was on the prowl. Back to the six heroes, they were paddling as fast as they could. "Man, I can't go on!" Daisy yelled as she stopped paddling as she then grabbed her hands. "It's all good we're almost at the end!" Malaria said. Out of curiosity, Rosalina looked back to see that the GGNRG was RIGHT behind them! "YOU ALL! LOOK! IT'S RIGHT BEHIND US!" Rosalina yelled frantically. They all began to scream, and kept paddling for the sake of paddling. They were this close to the edge of the pool. But they forgot to jump out of the raft. So they impacted into the edge of the swimming pool, and...

WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSHKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAABOBBBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Not only did the raft pop into a billion yellow ducky pieces, but at the same time the GGNRG impacted, popping into a billion giant, glowing neon rainbow giraffe pieces. Oh, and TONS of candy went everywhere, since the GGNRG was a piñata. With so much force, the two explosions caused our six heroes to plummet high into the vast night blue sky. Our heroes then locked arms with each other forming a circle, the force of the gravity causing tears to stream out of their eyes as they screamed. "THIS IS IT!" screamed Rosalina. "I LOVE Y'ALL!" Daisy screamed. "WELL, AT LEAST I DON'T HAVE TO PUT UP WITH TATL ANYMORE!" Young Link yelled. "I'M DYING ON AN EMPTY STOMACH?! MAN, CRUMMY DEAL!" Roy yelled. "I'VE ALWAYS SECRETLY LOVED YOU, ROY!" Althaia yelled. "IT WAS NEVER A SECRET; YOU KEPT GIVING ME GOO-GOO EYES!" Roy yelled back. Malaria then yelled, "GUYS, DON'T GIVE UP HOPE! WITH THE POWER OF MY MAGICAL AUTHOR-INHERITED POWERS, I CAN CAUSE A GIANT PARACHUTE TO APPEAR FROM THIN AIR SO WE CAN FLOAT SAFELY DOWN TO THE GR-" _SLAPPP! _Our six heroes then face-planted into the ground. Everything went silent for about one whole minute. They each individually peeled off the ground groggily, now with red marks on their faces from the force and rasping of the rocky concrete. "Oh, man…" Roy then groaned as he slowly sat up. "That was reality…" said Daisy as she rubbed her sore face. Rosalina then sat up and spit out dirt and grass, since she fell into a patch of grass. "Unng…uh…everything is spinning…" Young Link groaned as he sat up and rubbed his face. Althaia then sat up and said "Hmm…I should have learned to expect the unexpected…" Malaria was flat out unconscious. Luckily for her, she doesn't stay unconscious very long. "Uh…Is she going to be OK?" Rosalina asked, as she pointed at Malaria's unconscious body. "According to the narrator, she doesn't stay unconscious very long." Young Link commented, with Rosalina shrugging. Althaia then finally noticed, they were in the parking lot of a supermarket; THE supermarket where they sell…drumroll, please… Lot-sa Spaghetti! "Lotsa spaghetti! Now sold at your local Wal-Mart, K-Mart, Food-Mart, or any other stores ending in mart!" Althaia, and Malaria—who magically woke up from her unconscious state—chimed in unison with their teeth gleaming for cheesy advertising purposes. "That was weird," Young Link commented as he scratched his messy blonde hair. Rosalina nodded in agreement. "Agreeable." Roy said. "Totally." Daisy replied to Roy. "Well, aside from us plummeting into gritty gravel, that giraffe chase actually kinda paid off," Malaria said. "Well, what are we waiting for? Let's go into this place!" said Roy.

Our six heroes entered the dreaded of the dreads… Wal-Mart. Full of bratty kids, wailing babies, careless mothers, snooty clerks, fat people, people who don't know how to use "self-checkout," grandmas who misplaced their money and holds up lines, and people who bring change instead of dollars. "What is this place?" Young Link asked. "This is…Wal-mart." Malaria said. "Now guys, we've come here to get one thing, and one thing only; lotsa spaghetti. Got it?" Althaia said. "What aisle would that be on?" Rosalina asked. "The "Ah heck, I don't feel like cooking" aisle, also know as the Frozen Food aisle." Said Althaia. "Let's just get in, and get out!" she also commented. "Ooh! Ooh! I gotta go!" Daisy exclaimed as she started doing the potty-dance. "The bathrooms are right over there," Althaia said as she pointed to the signs that read "bathrooms." "Now don't dilly-dally! Be kind of quick about if you can." Althaia said, only to notice Daisy had already left to the bathroom. As our five heroes were walking through the store, making their way to the frozen food aisle, the sound of a baby annoyingly yelling could be heard pretty much through the whole store. "Ugh, make it stop…!" Roy said as he covered his ears and shook his head. "That poor child…" Rosalina said. "What do you mean by 'poor'? I bet their just whining over something they can't have." Malaria commented. "That's how it goes with little kids. You say no once, and their wailing like someone slapped them across the face." Young Link added, folding his arms. "I hope we can hurry up and get out of here. I never liked Wal-Mart, anyway," said a cranky Althaia, as she folded her arms. "It seems like the frozen food aisle is taking forever to get to…" Roy said. "Probably because of the endless crying that baby's doing," Rosalina said. The sound was getting even more dreading, now combined with the chattering of several busy people and other endless sounds. But finally, they approached the frozen food aisle. Oh, it was a joyous accomplishment. Everyone was smiling and frolicking, but suddenly….silence. The closer they got the more silent everything appeared to be. Then all of a sudden, our five heroes fell into a trap door! They then fell on top of each other, and they were inside a completely white room. "Are we at the insane asylum?! FREEDOM!" Malaria then yelled, then jumping up as she fist-pumped. "Wahaha! Foolish beings! You have fell for my diabolical trap!" said a cheesy, generic, villain voice. Everyone gasped as he then unveiled himself, and he was… M. Weed! "M. Weed…" Malaria and Althaia said in unison as they got into a fighting pose. "That's right! I, , have resurfaced, more diabolical than ever! Wahaha! And you'll never get your precious lotsa spaghetti, for only I have the lotsa spaghetti! Wahaha!" M. Weed then said in his diabolical voice, maniacally laughing. Everyone was silent, as crickets chirped throughout the background. Malaria then coughed. "...Wait. That's it?" Rosalina said as she crossed her arms. "Yeah! It's not like I'm some genie or something. That's all I've got." M. Weed said. "You know, I should have listened to my master. He's always told me to write a script for my schemes, but I told him it was unnecessary and pointless…" M. Weed said as he placed his left gloved index finger on his chin. "Maybe I should consider getting a villainous sidekick to help me with these things." He said. "Man, this guy is a talk show! Can't you just get on with whatever threat you pose?" Roy said as he crossed his arms. "I know. Seriously, ." Althaia said. "You asked for it! Now I will destroy you with my newest invention, the Pie-anator!" M. Weed exclaimed as he unveiled the Pie-anator. He then launched all sorts of different kinds of pie out of the Pie-anator, including peanut butter pie, gelatin pie, the infamous broccoli pie, and crème pie, covering the five heroes in a slab of pie, causing them to be sticky. With as much force the pies had when being launched, it slammed them into the walls. "Wahaha! Now what are you little fools going to do?" M. Weed said, as he laughed and continued to triumph. "We're gonna kick your butt. What the heck did you expect, this is my friggin' fanfiction!" Malaria said. M. Weed could only throw his hands in the air and scream like a little girl. "Double-Team Fury!" Malaria said, as Althaia then grabbed her and shadow-stepped towards M-Weed, and then threw Malaria at him like a cannonball, and while in midair, Malaria unsheaved her sword, Ukulele. When she hit the ground, she then threw her sword upward under and jumped up, performing Ike's Final Smash on M. Weed. "CHEESE, PIZZA!" she exclaimed as she recklessly slashed with fiery blazes on her sword. Finally, she did the final hit to , as he then went soaring. "I'LL HAVE MY REVENGE!" hollered as he blasted off again. Malaria then ran up to the lotsa spaghetti, as she picked it up. "Dun-dun-dun-DAAA! You've obtained the Lotsa Spaghetti!" a voice said. The five heroes came out of the trap door, reappearing at the foyer of the supermarket. "We did!" Malaria said. Then they started doing the "We Did It" dance from Dora the Explorer. After one excruciating minute, they were done with that parody. "Hey, where's Daisy?" Malaria said. "Hi!" Daisy said as she popped out of nowhere waving frantically. "Oh, hi Daisy. We can all go home now, since we got the spaghetti." Malaria said. "Aw. Okay." Daisy said.

Princess Peach, Toad, Ike, Baby Daisy, and Baby Peach were sitting on the couch with Marth's head resting on Peach's lap while he was asleep. They were watching TV. There was a Wal-Mart commercial on, and suddenly, the other six heroes then leaped from the TV.

Six Heroes: 0_0

Peach, Ike, Toad, Baby Daisy, & Baby Peach: AHHH!

Marth: SNORT!

Ike: *pulls out his sword* WHO GOES THERE?!

Malaria: Guys, it's just us!

Peach: Then how did you come through the TV?

Roy: Long story.

Althaia: Wrong formatting, narrator.

Oh. Yes, sorry. Ahem. Where was I…? Oh yes. So the six heroes were now…here somehow. Randomly, Peach let out a deep-pitched, brassy poot as she then giggled. "Yeesh what's that horrible smell" Marth said in his sleep. "Whoopsie. Excuse me!" Peach said as she blushed madly.

Everyone (excluding Peach and Marth): 0_0

Althaia: WRONG FORMATTING.

"You know what, Peach? No. Just…no." Baby Daisy said as she shook her head. "Peach, you de-railed my creative train of thought." Malaria said. "Oh, come on. It wasn't THAT bad…" Peach said. "Didn't somebody say that in an earlier chapter? 0_0" Malaria said. "What do you mean by someone said that in an earlier chapter?" Peach asked. "Here's a flashback."

FLASHBACK (Chapter 3)

-FLASHBACK-

It all started in the overused Smash Bros. Mansion, where—**BLOCKED; CONTENT PROHIBITED BY THE AUTHOR. **The author dare write Roy's story, as they don't want to be accused of too much toilet humor. Let's just say that it involved a LOT of farting that would bump this fanfiction up to a T-rating, and that would cause multiple problems. Basically, Roy destroyed the Smash Bros. Mansion with his farting, and caused havoc on Nintendo World or wherever they live. Chaos ensued. You, the reader may not have been able to read it, but everyone in the fanfiction did…

-END FLASHBACK-

"No, GOD! No, gosh please no! No! No! NOOOOOO!" Malaria screamed. "Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Baby Peach yelled. "My MIND! It HURTS! ASDFGHJKL;'" Young Link wailed. "Oh, come on. It wasn't THAT bad…" Roy admitted as he chuckled.

END FLASHBACK

"Oh yeah, I do remember that. It's when the author prohibited Roy's fart flashback." Young Link said. "I tell ya, it was NOT that bad!" Roy said as he chuckled. Peach then farted once more as she giggled, with everyone else groaning in disgust. "Peach, can you stop farting?" Malaria asked as she folded her cloaked arms. "Well you know as they say, better out than in!" Peach exclaimed as she slightly lifted her butt off of the couch seat, ripping a very loud fart—a fart loud enough for the television not be heard over it. "GAH! I NEED EVERYONE ONE TO BE QUIET!" Baby Peach yelled as she waved her fist in the air as she scowled. "Why?" Peach asked her baby counterpart. "Can't you see that I'm DOCTORING ON AN OCTOPUS BLAAAAH" Baby Peach yelled as she then got sprayed in the eyes with ink from the octopus that she was doctoring on. "What! My natural born eyes! They burn like the cinnamon challenge!" Baby Peach screamed. "Now I KNOW someone said that," Althaia commented.

FLASHBACK (Chapter 4)

Malaria: OH MY GO—YAAAH MY EYES! THEY BURN! THEY BURN! OUCH! OUCH! OH! WHOA HO!

Roy: Whoa, what's wrong with you?

Malaria: It's an insanely cute but perverted picture of Blue Toad in a Cat Suit!

Roy: It can't be that bad. *looks at picture of Cat Toad* AITSU MACCORNAI! MY EYES! MYE YEYES!

Malaria: THAT'S NOT EVEN JAPANESE!

Hey, hey, hey-hey hey! Keep it PG, kiddies!

Daisy: Lemme look at it… *looks at picture* Wow… Toad actually looks hot. Oh, Toadette is gonna have a hoot with this… *snickers*

KEEP IT PG. kthxbai

Abay Aisy: What! My natural born eyes! They burn like the cinnamon challenge!

Daisy: Who is Abay Aisy?

Baby Daisy: The author made a terrible typo when typing my name, so she just decided to go with it.

END FLASHBACK

"…I did say that, didn't I?" Abay Aisy said. "The author made the same terrible typo when typing your name, I see." Daisy said to her baby counterpart. "I'm capable of farting fire." Roy said. "I'm capable of farting flowers." Daisy said. "I'm capable of farting hearts!" Peach said. "I'm capable of farting PIZZA" Marth said in his sleep.

Everyone: (except for Marth): 0_0 LOL XD

Then POOF! Everyone was magically at the dinner table, with the spaghetti served.

Everyone: 0_0

"Gee, I sure hope this spaghetti is good!" Roy said. "Lot Sa Spaghetti!" Weegee then said, as he magically appeared from a box of Lucky Charms. Everyone then stopped eating as they stared at Weegee, who then vanished. "G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-Ghet T-T-T-T-T-T-T-Ti G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-Ghet T-T-T-T-T-T-T-Ti" Weegee said as he kept staring at everyone's spaghetti, with them suddenly losing their appetites. "G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-Ghet T-T-T-T-T-T-T-Ti G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-Ghet T-T-T-T-T-T-T-Ti" Weegee said as he then appeared on top of the table, with colors spiraling from every direction. "Lotsa Spaghetti Ghetti Lotsa Spaghetti Ghetti Lotsa Spaghetti Ghetti" Weegee was now making the room flash colors, and he kept popping out of everyone's plate of spaghetti. "HE BROKE OUT OF THE W-W-WEEGEE ROOM!" Malaria exclaimed frantically as she threw her hands in the air. "HE BROKE OUT OF THE W-W-WEEGEE ROOM! BROKE OUT OF WEEGEE ROOM! BROKE OUT OF WEEGEE ROOM! B-B-B-BROKE W-W-WEEGEE" MALARIA SCREAMED AND THEN EVERYONE WAS FREAKING OUT AND STUFF. "WHY IS EVERYONE TALKING IN ALL CAPS? THIS SHOULD NOT BE!" ALTHAIA SAID, AND THEN PEACH FARTED AGAIN "Okay this chapter is getting severely stupid so STOP IT!"

Kawaii-Pinkberry: Hi guys! Did you like this chapter? It was supposed to be a bit creepy but—

_**1:33 a.m**_

Everyone was in The Game Room, listening to Coast to Coast with George Noory. "OH MY GOSH WHY ARE WE LISTENING TO THIS?!" Peach said as she then let loose again. "If you do that one more time, I'm cutting you from this fanfiction." Malaria said sternly. "Y-yes ma'am," Peach said as she then saluted. "OH MY GOSH THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT THE BLACK-EYED KIDS!" Daisy yelled. "OH MY GOSH THEY ARE!" Rosalina screamed. "OH MY GOSH WILL YOU GUYS STOP SAYING OH MY GOSH!" Roy said angrily. "I'm glad you did that." Althaia said. Then The Song of Unhealing starts playing. Everyone looked at Althaia oddly.

_Meanwhile downstairs…_

Two pairs of footsteps could be heard, and then someone yawned. "That's the third time you yawned like that. If you keep doing that, you're going to get us caught!" a watery, light, metallic-like voice spoke. "And if you keep farting you're going to get us caught. Wait-what? Why are we sneaking around here if we perfectly know that there are already video game characters here?" a light, echoing voice spoke. "You already know why! I don't need to keep repeating myself!" she said as she let out a loud, brassy poot. "They should start calling you Stink Gold Pe—" SHHH NO MY GOD YOU'LL RUIN IT!

"What the crabbage was that?" Baby Peach said as she scratched her head, implying the narrator's yelling. "I dunno. Hey guys I'm gonna go check it out." Malaria said. She then left the game room, and closed the door. "Dude, dude. I heard someone." The echoing voice said. "Hide!" the metallic voice said. When Malaria was coming down the steps, she saw Baby Rosalina for a split second. "Who dat? Who dat? Who dat? Who?" Malaria said as she came down the steps. Baby Rosalina then slid under the couch and hid under. As Malaria reached the bottom of the steps, suddenly she heard someone go "Ha-cha!" Pink Gold Peach then did the Pink Gold Bomber on Malaria, the pink gold hearts farting out on her. "OW OOH OOH OOH!" Malaria yelled as she fell to the ground. "Oh MY GOD WHAT THE—BRO, NO! WHAT WAS THAT!?" Malaria yelled. "Me!" Pink Gold Peach said as she performed the Pink Gold Bomber once more, this time a fiery explosion instead of hearts on Malaria. "Me WHO! OUCH, OUCH AHHH!" Malaria screamed. "I'M ON FIRE! AH! GAH! OH, OH OH OH!" Malaria screamed as she jumped around like cRaZy. "FIRE FIRE FIRE FIRE EVERYWHERE! OH OH WHOAWHOA WHOA! STAHP. DRAHP. RAWL. STAHP. DRAHP. RAWL." Malaria said, as she stopped, dropped, and rolled. Then the fire was magically gone. "Now I can finally figure out who's in here! ^-^" Malaria then turned on the light, and then she saw that it was Stink Gold Peach—derr, Pink Gold Peach! Malaria gasped. "GAH! OOGLY OOGLY OOGLY! OOGLY OOGLY OH MY OOGLY! STRANGER DANGER! STRANGER DANGER! WHA! WHA! WHAAAAAA!" Malaria screamed as she then ran smack into Pink Gold Peach, bouncing off and stumbling backwards. "AYE!" Baby Rosalina then shouted as she rolled from under the couch, as Malaria and Pink Gold Peach just stared at her with concerned looks on their faces.

Malaria: And then we're talking like this again…0_0

Baby Rosalina: What?

Pink Gold Peach: *uses the Pink Gold Bomber on Malaria*

Malaria: CUT MY LIFE INTO PIECES; THIS IS MY LAST RESORT *pulls out Ukulele*

Malaria then swung at Pink Gold Peach with her sword, Ukulele. And then it reflected off of Pink Gold Peach. She then recoiled backwards as she froze in place, gritting her teeth with her eyes widened. "Oh my glob what is that ringing noise?! AHH! The world is RINGDING! 0_0" Malaria said. Suddenly, Althaia came running down stairs with a frying pan clenched in her hands like a baseball bat. "Not again," she said as she ran right past Baby Rosalina and Pink Gold Peach who could only watch, hitting Malaria upside in the head with the frying pan. "Mario, help me!" Malaria exclaimed in a high-pitched tone of voice sounding a lot like Princess Peach. "This could take some time…" Althaia said.

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Hello, this is JP-Dice-

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: O say can you see-

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Bite-bite, sip-sip, do the Deep-Deep-Dish combo mambo!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Another day, another nickel!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Ni hao, I'm Kai-Lan!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Milli, Geo, Bot and You!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Hot-dog hot-dog hot diggity dog—

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Like a good neighbor, StateFarm is there!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: You're…going… to love me!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: No task is too tough for Strawberry Shortcake—

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Taste the rainbow

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Pink Gold Peach!

Pink Gold Peach: What 0_0

Baby Rosalina: Wow 0-0

Malaria: Oh, you poser! I'm Pink Gold Peach!

Althaia: This could be interesting. On second thought…

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Woop woop!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: This. Is. SPARTA!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Waka waka!

So Malaria has been, let's see…. Peach, JP-Dice, Squidward Tentacles, Pink Gold Peach, Team Umizoomi, Kai-Lan, Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, Fluttershy, Little Caesars commercial, Skittles Commercial, Jake from State Farm, Jackie Evancho singing the National Anthem, Strawberry Shortcake, Althaia, Samyatang, Sparta, Sanic, Shrek, Bigley, Goku, and Pac-Man…where can it go from here…

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Itsa me, Mario!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Oh yeah, Luigi!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Waluigi Time!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Itsa Wario time!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: THAT HIT ME IN MY STOMACH!

Althaia: Actually that hit you in your head *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: IT'S A ZOMBIE IN THERE!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Baby, baby, baby ohh—

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: You've met with a terrible fate, haven't you?

Pink Gold Peach: What's wrong with her?

Althaia: The reaction to her trying to hit you with her sword Ukulele caused her to have a dramatic impact, so now she thinks she's various characters, including you.

Malaria: Oohoo, whee!

^ Yes, that was an imitation of Pink Gold Peach.

Pink Gold Peach: Okay, I'm just going to go home now… *tries to get in TV* *gets spit back out* Looks like I'm stuck here.

Althaia: Another day, another NICKEL. EHEEHEEE HEE HEE. Ahem. What I meant was… The more, the merrier.

Pink Gold Peach, the metallic princess of metal, joins the Fanfiction!

Everyone: 0_0

Baby Rosalina: I'm stuck here too.

Baby Rosalina, the baby galactic goddess joins the Fanfiction!

Althaia: When we get Malaria back to normal, we can end the fanfiction.

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: A little koo-koo Fanboy and Chum Chum—

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: D-I-N-O V-I-T-E!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Popipo pipopi po!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Pink Gold Peach: 0_0

Baby Rosalina: -_-

Althaia: ._.

Malaria: ^-^

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Gimme a break! Gimme a break! Break me off a piece of that Kit-Kat bar!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: I turn on my radio in the middle of the night

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: What the fox say?!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Water water whales!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Bananas in Pajamas!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Can I have yo numbah?

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Hi I'm Daisy!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Lotsa Spaghetti!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: We gonna wide teh bikes on teh beach

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Getcha back up off the wall!

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Get down on it

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Get down on it

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Get down on it

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Get down on it

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: Dude I just wanna dance

Althaia: *hits Malaria in the head*

Malaria: SERIOUSLY I'm Malaria now; you can stop hitting me in the head.

Everyone: *falls over anime style*

This should've ended long ago.

And now the three Peaches reunite!

Baby Peach: I WAS NEVER UNITED WITH THEM!

Princess Daisy: Why not?

Baby Peach: Because they far—

Peach and Pink Gold Peach: *both do the Peach Bomber on Baby Peach*

Baby Peach: WHY ME

Kawaii Pinkberry: Like I was saying earlier, this was supposed to be creepy, but a change of plans happened. One because Pink Gold Peach and Baby Rosalina were revealed in the makings of this chapter. Anyway, stay tuned for the next chapter of TMoMaA: TSV!


	6. The Chapter With No Plot Whatsoever

**The Chapter with No Plot Whatsoever**

Kawaii Pinkberry: Yo yo yo! Hi guys, it's me, Kawaii Pinkberry! Woo hoo! *audience claps* As you can see, the chapter before this one was very, very random towards the end. Why? Well, I got writer's block, and on top of that, Baby Rosalina and Pink Gold Peach were revealed for Mario Kart 8 during the makings of that chapter. You're probably wondering "how does that affect the plot?" Well, it does in a lot of ways. And that's just the way it is. Anyhow, this is Chapter 6.1, also known as The Chapter with No Plot Whatsoever. It's a filler-chapter until I can get some actual ideas. And for chapter 6.1, they will use the dialogue as seen in the Author's Notes. Since that tidbit of information is out of the way, let the narrator guy take over.

It was 4:44 for in The House of the Dreaded Cousins (?) where everyone was seemingly restless. Every since the abrupt introduction of Pink Gold Peach and Baby Rosalina, the other eleven heroes (Marth is still asleep) where a bit frightened. Not only that but the stars of the n—

"Shut up, Duke L. Deuce. Can't you see I'm trying to get my beauty sleep?" Pink Gold Peach seemingly yelled at the ceiling. "Is there a kitten up there?" Princess Peach asked her metallic counterpart. "Who is Duke L. Deuce?" Baby Peach also asked her older metallic counterpart.

I'm Duke L. Deuce, I the narrator said.

"What's the L stand for?" Princess Daisy asked the mysterious voice coming from the ceiling.

Large. I, the narrator says.

"So your name is Duke Large Deuce?" Daisy asked.

Yes.

Roy then burst out laughing. "You CAN'T be serious. Oh ho oh, that is rich! Hahahahaha!" Roy began to laugh like the incompetent dope that he is.

"Hey, I heard that!" Roy then yelled as his laughing fit came to an abrupt end.

Moving on with the plot, the—

Malaria: Just a second! You said this was a story with no plot!

Ahem, sorry, that is correct. You may go on with your lives, as I narrate it.

Everyone: 0_0

In order to not confuse the readers, Princess Peach will be referred to as , Baby Peach will be referred to as , and Pink Gold Peach will be referred to as P. .

: And what about the Daisies?

What about the Daisies?

: There's Daisy and Baby Daisy, and they're not referred to as P. Daisy and B. Daisy!

P. : Yeah! And what about the Rosalinas?

Until there is an Orange Silver Daisy or a Teal Platinum Rosalina, they can be referred to by their actual names.

: That's fair -_-

Althaia: Hey! You got cheese and meat on my baked, sauced, flatbread!

Malaria: Hey! You got baked, sauced, flatbread on my cheese and meat!

Althaia and Malaria: *both chump on food* Hey…this tastes pretty good! *gasp* we just invented Baked Sauced Cheese Meat Flatbread!

Young Link: *pizza

Althaia and Malaria: *joykill*

: *farts loudly*

Malaria: STOP! REMEMBER I SAID IF YOU DO THAT AGAIN, I'LL KICK YOU OUT OF MY FANFICTION?!

: Hey! It wasn't me! It was P. !

P. : Lies! It was not me! It was !

: NO! It wudn't me! It was…the media!

Malaria: That'll work. I have no objections.

Ike: Got gas? Blame the media.

Toad: Can I go to sleep?

Daisy: Knock yourself out.

Toad: Okay! *hits himself with a frying pan*

Daisy: Not my point, but that'll work too.

And then a mysterious person in a robe shows up, to catch the now twelve heroes off guard.

?: I have a cookie.

Malaria: Gimme dat cookie!

?: Okay, you can have it…

Malaria: Yay!

?: …for 2000$ dollars.

Malaria: NO! *snatches robe off of hooded figure*

It was Banunuh. (Pronounced ba-noo-nah)

Malaria: Banunuh?! It's so good to see you! I thought that the Evil Monkey Empire had done you in!

B: I made an agreement with the Emperor Evil Monkey so the Evil Monkeys let me off the hook.

Malaria: What kind of agreement?

B: I had to the hokey-pokey fifteen times while wearing a sombrero, a hockey mask, some clown shoes, and a pink tunic on worldwide broadcasting.

Malaria: So that was you on TV that day… xD

P. : *walks by holding a mousetrap* How does this contraption work?

Malaria: Just put your hand in it.

P. : Okay *puts hand in mousetrap* Ooh, ouch! OUCH!

B: That wouldn't happen to be…Pink Gold Peach, would it?

Malaria: Yes, yes it is.

P. : Ouch get my hand out of this contraption!

Malaria: If you wanted some cheese, you could've just asked -_- *hands her a cube of cheese*

P. : I didn't want cheese. What does this contraption have to do with cheese?

Malaria: Mouse sees cheese in mousetrap. Mouse wants cheese. Mouse runs in trap. Mouse—

P. : The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy brown dog.

Malaria: 0_0

P. : Sorry. You may proceed.

Malaria: AS I was saying, mouse sees cheese in mousetrap. Mouse wants cheese. Mouse runs in trap. Mouse dies in trap.

P. : Why would you kill the innocent creature?

Malaria: you're not the one whose been scared off the toilet seat when a mouse runs in the bathroom. You're not the one who had a mouse sleep in bed with you. You're not the one who's been bitten by a mouse and had to be taken to the E.R to be treated for rabies.

P. : Oh, mice carry rabies? Speak no more. I shall destroy any mouse that comes in my path.

Malaria: That's the mousetrap's job.

P. : Oh. *gets hand out of mousetrap and puts it back on the ground*

Althaia: Is this now The Misadventures of Malaria and Pink Gold Peach? -_-

Malaria: Why would you say that 0_0?

Roy: You and P. have been having this long conversation and no one can talk besides you two.

P. : She was trying to explain to me what a mousetrap is.

Baby Rosalina: Well Google was invented for a reason; go use that. Thanks to you, people like me haven't had a chance to talk.

P. : What is Goo—

Baby Rosalina: and don't ask what Google is, use Wikipedia to learn what it is.

P. : Okay…?

Althaia: Did you guys hear? They found the body of Bigfoot washed up on the beach.

Everyone: WHAT?!

B. Peach: But I thought Bigfoot was a myth?

Althaia: I was getting to that. They THOUGHT it was the body of Bigfoot, but it was human DNA in it. Part of it was human DNA, another part was a bear DNA, and the other part was ape DNA. And after tearing into the thing, they found severed animal and human parts in the fur. So it was some elaborate hoax.

Princess Daisy: Does anyone remember Finding Bigfoot?

B: Yeah, that show ended years ago, they supposedly "found" Bigfoot, with no video proof -_-

Malaria: That's sad.

B: I was addicted to that show! -.-

Ike: See why I never watch sitcoms, reality shows or stuff like that? They always have horrible endings.

Young Link: So true, oh so true.

Althaia: Happened to me when I was watching this anime called Clannad.

Malaria: The anime started off really good, but then it went awry from there. If Nagisa and Tomoya didn't get married, then that would've been a good anime.

Althaia: and then Nagisa died -_-

Malaria: You never see the rest of the cast either anymore in the show, either.

Princess Daisy: What are you guys talking about?

Malaria: An anime with an awful ending.

Rosalina: Everything on Lifetime Movie Network has a horrible ending.

: I hate Lifetime -_-

and P. : What…? But we love Lifetime! D:

Althaia: That was pretty darn unexpected.

: But I love soap operas!

Young Link: Am I even still in this fanfiction? -_-

Malaria: Speak up.

B: …and then the llama with wings swooped up my goldfish named Alberto. I found Alberto's severed fin in the foyer of my apartment, but I never seen any traces of his other body parts. ;-;

Roy: Wow, that's pretty harsh. I wonder how goldfish tastes.

Princess Daisy: How annoying would it be if I referred to myself in the third-person?

, , P. , Baby Daisy, Baby Rosalina and Rosalina: Very annoying.

Princess Daisy: Daisy is really bored. Daisy wishes that she has something better to do than to annoy the crabbage out of her peculiar friends.

Ike: The story without any plot whatsoever.

Young Link: So I messed up and bought an extra glockenspiel. But now rumor has it that I have a world-famous glockenspiel collection. Rumors can easily spiral out of control quickly, wouldn't anyone agree?

: Totally. Since I used the Peach Bomber, everyone thinks that it's an explosive fart or that I fart out hearts. -_-

Roy: Wait—so you don't fart out hearts…? 0_0

: Yeah I can but just not with the Peach Bomber.

Roy: But you hit people with your butt and then hearts come out…

: No, it's not my butt, it's my hip. How can a fart come out of my hip?

Malaria: upon examination of the Peach Bomber, you hit people with your hip but the hearts come out of your butt.

: Let's change the subject

Everyone: Okay

Althaia: Mar llama la!

Malaria: Mar llama lama!

: The

P. : Smash

: Brothers

: Mansion

P. : Is

: Crazy

Malaria: Why did you guys just talk like that? 0_0

: We

: Felt

P. : Like

: It

Roy: Bananas in Pajamas!

B: Are bouncing down the stairs!

P. : Bananas in Pajamas!

Ike: Are chasing teddy bears!

Everyone else: 0_0

Malaria: Why are we not asleep yet?

P. : SLEEP?! WE DON'T NEED NO STINKIN' SLEEP!

Malaria: You told the random narrator guy that you need your beauty sleep earlier.

: P. knows no matter how much she sleeps she's still gonna have one ugly mug :D

P. : B. Peach…*cracks knuckles*

: *gulps* Eep.

And so Pink Gold Peach chased Baby Peach out of the room. You could only hear agonizing from Baby Peach coming from the other room.

Malaria: Okay… Moving along.

Young Link: I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream! :D

Everyone: *claps in rhythm*

Baby Peach then came back in the room with a black eye.

Malaria: What happened to you? 0_0

: *points to Pink Gold Peach* she did it

P. : It's her own fault for calling me ugly.

Malaria: Dude, Mario Kart 8 has a horrible roster.

Althaia: Tell me about it.

Roy: I thought it couldn't get any worse than the baby characters.

Malaria: Well now it's babies, Koopalings and metal clones -_-

P. : *scowls at Malaria* *cracks knuckles*

Malaria: *gulp* eh, Why was I ever complaining about the Mario Kart 8 roster again? Heheheh…

?: Wahaha!

Everyone: WHO DAT?!

?: I am Orange Silver Daisy!

No. Just no. Plain and simple. We aren't going there.

Everyone: O…kay. 0_0

Roy: Water water whales!

Baby Daisy: They came from Hell!

Daisy: How bad they smell!

P. : Makes me wanna wail!

Malaria: Hey guys, no swearing in this fanfiction, remember? -_-

P. : Hell is not a swear, unless it's used in the wrong context.

Malaria: Why are you so smart _

Roy: It's in her genes. Guess what else is in her jeans? (;

P. : I am not even wearing any jeans.

Roy: I think you meant "skinny jeans" not "any jeans."

Malaria: Roy, do you have a crush on P. or something? .-.

Roy: What? Nah! I'm just teasing with her for a bit!

P. : …

Roy: -_-

: While we're being weird I may as well ask. P. , why do you have a…eh, shiny hiney?

P. : A what?

: Don't make me say it again -_-

P. : How do you expect me to answer your question if I didn't hear you?

: not like you actually have to hear me, the narrator repeats everything we say -_-

P. : Then what did you ask me?

: Why do you a have a shiny hiney?

P. : "Hiney" does not compute. Try again.

: *sighs* Why do have a shiny hiney? You know, BUTT, BOOTY, REAR, AS—

P. : I have a polishing routine.

: On your…butt? 0_0

P. : Yes.

: I mean it's so sleek I can see my reflection on your shiny rear.

P. : Don't get too close.

: Why?

P. : *farts loudly*

: NOOOO

Malaria: Tra lalala frontier disco pet

Althaia: Boom shaka-laka laka boom shaka-laka laka

P. : Can't you see that I and were having an important conversation?

Malaria: We're trying to change the subject

: Why?

Roy: We don't wanna hear about her shiny hiney

Althaia: you were the one who brought up P. 's butt anyway Roy -_-

Rosalina: I don't like this subject… ._.

B: Yes

Daisy: Totally

Baby Daisy: Seriously

Baby Rosalina: Dude

Malaria: From

Althaia: Now

B: On

Malaria: Every

Althaia: Body

W: Talk

Malaria: Like

Althaia: This

B: Okay?

Roy: But

Ike: How

Princess Daisy: Do

: We

Rosalina: Talk

: Like

Ike: That

Baby Daisy: If

Baby Rosalina: We

P. : Can't

Roy: Think

Ike: For

Princess Daisy: Each

: Other?

Malaria: You

Althaia: Just

B: Did

Everyone else: Oh

Malaria: Why

P. : Aren't

Althaia: We

B: Using

P. : Commas

Malaria: Or

Althaia: Periods?

Roy: I'm

: Getting

Ike: Tired

Rosalina: Of

Althaia: Talking

Princess Daisy: Like

W: This

Baby Daisy: Already

Malaria: I

B: Agree

Althaia: It's

Malaria: A

W: Clever

P. : Pastime

Roy: So

Young Link: We

Rosalina: Can

: Move

Baby Daisy: Onto

Baby Rosalina: The

Rosalina: Next

Daisy: Chapter

: Already

P. : Negation

Malaria: Use

Princess Daisy: (Consider

Rosalina: Revising)

Malaria: Okay

Althaia: Everyone

Malaria: Stop

Althaia: Talking

Malaria: Like

Althaia: This

Everyone else: I'm glad you did that.

Malaria: Okay, don't talk in harmony either.

Everyone else: Okay

Malaria: -_-

P. : Will I be in SSB4?

Princess Daisy: No.

P. : Why do you say that?

Rosalina: It's obvious, P. .

: The only Peach who gets in SSB4 is -_-

: Tee hee…that's right!

Malaria: They Came From That Away: Coming to Theatres September 21st, 2014

Althaia: No, They Obviously Came From That Away: The Sequel to They Came From That Away. In Theatres October 24th, 2015

Malaria: I'm Pretty Sure They Came From That Away: The Sequel to No, They Obviously Came From That Away. In Theatres November 22nd, 2016

B: Everyone Knows They Came From That Away: Coming to Theatres December 25th, 2017

Everyone else besides Malaria, Banunuh, and Althaia: 0_0

Young Link: I'm so lost

Malaria: It's the chapter with no plot whatsoever, everyone is lost.

Althaia: Heartburn, indigestion, nausea, upset stomach; diarrhea

Everyone: Hey Pepto-Bismol!

Malaria: Something tells me that you said that wrong, Althaia…

Althaia: The author is too lazy to go look up the Pepto-Bismol commercial.

B: Has anyone seen my can of chili?

Princess Daisy: Why the heck do you have a can of chili? 0_0

B: My Ma told me to pick up dinner, so I bought a jumbo-size can of chili.

Malaria: We'll find your chi—

: BURP!

Everyone (besides ): 0_0

: Oh dear, excuse me… *blushes madly*

Malaria: Excuse you, then 0_0

Althaia: Why does everyone wear out this face now? 0_0

: I knew I shouldn't have eaten that can of chili…

B: You what?! oAo

: Well, I was hungry…

B: Did you at least cook it before you ate it? 0_0

: No, I just opened it and ate it with a spoon.

B: -_-

Malaria: D'OH MY GOD SHE'S GONNA BLOW!

Althaia: WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

Malaria: IT MEANS THAT SHE'S GOING TO GO GASEOUS

: WHERE'S THE BATHROOM?!

Malaria: I DUNNO

Althaia: SECOND DOOR DOWN THE HALL TO THE LEFT!

: OKAY THANKS *runs off to bathroom*

Malaria: That could've gone horribly wrong.

B: Yes.

Young Link: And I thought I was the one with the farting problem

Malaria: They never made Young Link's Farting Problem.

Young Link: I and Toon Link are technically the same character, so same difference.

Althaia: D'okay

B: You put your left foot in,

Malaria: You put your left foot out,

Althaia: You put your left foot in,

Ike: And you shake it all about

P. : You do the hokey pokey

Baby Daisy: And you turn yourself around

Roy: That's what it's all about

Malaria: How you gonna do it if you really don't wanna dance by standing on the wall

: Get your back up off the wall

Althaia: Tell me, how you gonna do it if you don't really wanna dance, by standing on the wall?

Baby Daisy: Get your back up off the wall

Princess Daisy: 'Cause I heard all the people sayin'

Ike: Get down it

P. : Come on and

Baby Rosalina: Get down on it

Roy: If you really want it

Rosalina: Get down on it

Marth: Get down on it *goes back to sleep*

B: Get down on it

Princess Daisy: Why do we sing so much in this chapter? 0_0

Malaria: We don't have much else to do.

Young Link: Why don't we just end this chapter?

Ike: Yeah. We can seriously move on to the next chapter.

?: O hummye bunny pencak silat lotta choca…

B. Peach: Samyatang?!

Samyatang: Yes, it is I, Samyatang. I can hear the cries of dreaded pleas to end this chapter…

Baby Daisy: Not exactly what it was, but that'll do. Get us the frap outta here!

Samyatang: Okay, you know the drill. Find the plothole.

Malaria: There is no plothole; this is the Chapter without a Plot.

Samyatang: O

Baby Rosalina: Who are you?

Samyatang: I am Samyatang, imp of the narrators… I was sent here by the narrators to free those from the Realm of Fiction…

Althaia: That's not what you said the first time, Samyatang.

Malaria: This is what you said to us: I am Samyatang! I was sent by the Authors to come and protect those who break the Fourth Wall.

Samyatang: O. I do that too.

P. : If you ask me, she looks like a Shadow Baby Daisy.

Samyatang: Well no one asked you

P. : Touché.

B: Did I miss something?

Malaria: Banunuh, read chapter three if you're confused.

B: Okay. *goes to read chapter 3*

Rosalina: …so who are we gonna get out of here without a plothole?

Samyatang: through a Black Hole.

Everyone else: Are you out of your MIND?!

Samyatang: Relax. I've got it handled.

Then, a Black Hole opens out of nowhere, sucking everyone into it; even Samyatang. Everyone was screaming and panicking, not knowing what they're fates were going to be.

Kawaii-Pinkberry: Hai guys! That's it for chapter 6.1. And I got some ideas for another chapter, so I'm going to end this one and not drabble your eyes out with the author's notes.

Everyone: *comes out of black hole*

Samyatang: Well, it looks like I'm stuck here until you guys find an actual plothole.

Everyone else: *gasp* YAY

Samyatang: -_-

Well, that's it for this chapter of TMOMAA: TSV! Stay tuned for more!


	7. The Real Chapter 6

**The Real Chapter 6**

Kawaii Pinkberry: Hai everybody! Just to let you all know, this is the real deal; Chapter 6 is served! Can't exactly be too sure if the randomness is reduced, but read anyway! Yippay! Hoo! And also, Samyatang and Banunuh join the Fanfiction! *audience claps* and here is Duke L. Deuce, the narrator guy!

Duke L. Deuce: Hello everyone, I am Duke Large Deuce, and I'll be your host for this chapter of The Misadventures of Malaria and Althaia: The Smashers Visit! In this chapter, Malaria and Althaia will find out that these video game characters all have crazy antics of their own, and they'll have to do their best to cope with them. Like Princess Peach's farting dilemma, Ike's cottage cheese addiction, and Young Link's docodytis. That's a lot of madness for one house! Not only that, but they all realize that the videogame characters are stuck in The Real World, and in a later chapter, will have to find a way to be sent back home. Is Princess Rosalina the only sane one? Is Althaia forever cranky without her proper 3 hours of sleep? Will Banunuh find some bananas? Will Princess Daisy stay the fairest of them all forever? Will Scorpietta stop clinging to peoples arms?! Find out all of those things (and who Scorpietta is) all in this one cRaZy chapter of The Misadventures of Malaria and Althaia: The Smashers Visit!

Before we start, let us tell you what docodytis is. Docodytis; a fantasized syndrome to look at every single thing that moves.

_**Dawn of the Second Day: 48 hours remain…**_

It was 6:00 a.m. in the morning, where Malaria and Althaia were sleeping heavily in the sloppy bed in their game room. They actually haven't been asleep until sunrise that day. Malaria was snoring loudly, cuddling her Gamecube controller, with their pet cat Scorpietta clinging to Althaia's left arm. They were getting some well-deserved shuteye, when suddenly… "Woo! Woohoo! Get up! Get up!" a familiar voice said, as the person was jumping up and down on the bed. Althaia murmured in her sleep as she then faintly opened her eyes, as she closed them again. Then her eyes peered open to see that the person jumping on the bed was Pink Gold Peach, who was squealing in excitement for no apparent reason. "What the crabbage are you doing?! Can't you see that I'm trying to get some—OW, GLOB DARN IT!" Althaia yelled in pain as Scorpietta's razor-sharp claws were digging into her skin. Althaia leaped out of bed and rolled on the floor, screaming and agonizing. She attempted to fling the cat from her arm; she even tried to wrestle it from her arm, but to no avail. Malaria then said from her sleep, "I'll GET THE CROWBAR!" she yelled, leaping out of bed in a superhero style and getting the crowbar out from under the bed. She was now trying to pry Scorpietta's claws out of Althaia's skin. After one painful minute, the cat was successfully out of Althaia's arm. "Oh, thank glob…you saved me…" Althaia said. "Hey, no problem." Malaria said. Althaia then looked at the alarm clock ahead of the bed, to see that it was 6:05 in the morning. "Just what the heck gives? Why did you wake me up? It's only six in the morning!" Althaia said as she pointed at the metallic figure in front of her, and then folded her arms. Pink Gold Peach then giggled. "Well, everyone is wide awake, anyway!" Pink Gold Peach commented. "Dab nab it! We better go check and see if everything is in one piece," Althaia said.

Meanwhile downstairs, everything was seemingly stable. The baby characters where watching cartoons on TV, Samyatang was reading an ancient spell book, and Marth was lying across the couch, trying to get some rest. Althaia, Malaria, and Pink Gold Peach came downstairs, and Young Link stared at them. "Oh, hi guys!" Young Link exclaimed cheerfully. "Hey." Althaia said, only to notice that Young Link was staring at her with a passion. "…Is there something on my face?" Althaia asked. "Nah. I'm just following your eyes." Young Link commented. Althaia then scratched the back of her head. "O…kay then. Hey, is someone burning something?" Althaia asked. "It's Roy," Baby Daisy informed them. "He's been burning can goods all morning." Malaria then gasped as she covered her mouth, and then dropped her hands to the floor as she fell on her knees. "My CAN GOODS! BRO, WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING?!" Malaria shrieked as she ran up to Roy. "Burning can goods. It's not like people actually eat these things," Roy said. "Well WE DO! Come on, not the cream corn! The butterbeans, dude?! Seriously man, why the canned pineapples?! Ah, ravioli?!" Malaria exclaimed as she facepalmed with both hands, shaking her head in grief over the burnt can goods. "Malaria, Roy has a point. You've been collecting those can goods since crèche, and I haven't seen you eat not one can of that stuff." Althaia commented. "Come to think of it, we've nearly starved to death several times because you didn't let us chow down on those can goods. They're for eating, not collecting!" she added. "Okay…fine. Those can goods do end up in unnatural places, anyway. Last time I found one in the shower." Malaria muttered as she folded her arms. "Hey, umm…I hate to barge in on your conversation, but…" Ike said as he sheepishly rubbed the back of his head, as he looked down at his feet. "Speaking of uh, canned goods…you wouldn't happen to have any canned cottage cheese, would you?" Ike asked sheepishly. "Canned cottage cheese? Oh, well…We do, but I'm not sure if that stuff is safe to consume. We've had it since we first met Banunuh, which was in 2003." Malaria said. "Oh, it's fine. I've ate cottage cheese from the 80's before, so it's no problem." Ike said. "Um…okay then. Here you…go?" Malaria gave him the can of cottage cheese. "Oh, thank you. You don't know how much this means to me," Ike said. He raised the can in front of him and relished in the savory substance, as he licked his lips. He then started to devour the cottage cheese in front of Malaria and Althaia, who then exchanged disgusted glares with each other. Princess Peach's stomach then growled as she gasped, and then she giggled. She then skipped merrily over to Marth, and then sat on his face. With no hesitation, Peach let out a loud, brassy poot in Marth's face, who could only throw his hands in the air as he flailed, accidentally tipping over the couch and falling flat on his back, rolling over on the floor. "Tee hee! Excuse me!" Peach said as she giggled, farting loudly once more with Malaria's jaw dropping in disbelief, and Althaia falling over in shock. "I-I've…never known you to fart like THAT, Peach…what the crabbage?" Malaria said, with her left eye twitching. "Oh, well…I've just been feeling unusually gassy today!" Peach exclaimed as she farted again, her brassy flatulence echoing throughout the living room. "I'm not sure what to say here." Althaia said, as she stood up off the floor, regaining her balance. "Ditto…" Malaria commented. Then a rather awkward silence filled the room, with Peach breaking the silence and wind with another loud fart, as she giggled to herself. Malaria then scratched her head in confusion and closed her eyes. "Man, that's weird stuff. Hey, where's Banunuh?" Malaria asked. "Funny that you mention that, actually, Malaria. Banunuh was weirded out by Peach's bad gas, so he left to go get some bananas. If everything turned out well for him, he should be back pretty soon." Ike said. "Oh yeah. Banunuh calls bananas his happy food. It helps him find the answer to his unanswered questions is what he tells me." Malaria commented. Althaia then folded her arms and nodded. "That Banunuh…he sure is quite an interesting character." Althaia said.

Meanwhile, Banunuh was kicking around an empty soda can across a lone park trail with both hands in his dark gray robe pockets. After he searched Wal-Mart, Food-Mart, K-Mart, and all the other stores ending in "mart," Banunuh just couldn't seem to find any bananas. "Hmm…never known it to be this hard to find bananas," Banunuh said to himself, as he looked down. Suddenly, _SPLAT! _A distinctive splatter noise could be heard, as Banunuh then gasped in shock, as he then sighed with a dull look on his face. "Sometimes, I wonder if the author hates me." Banunuh said, implying this since a random bird had just pooped on his head. Groaning, he then hesitantly flung the white substance off of his head, his robe sleeve being filthy. "Great, this was my new robe, too. Looks like I'll just have to suck it up." He commented. While he was walking, he suddenly got pecked in the head by a random crow. "Ow!" he yelled as he rubbed the back of his head. As he was running, he accidentally tripped over his own robe, falling flat on his face. He got up quickly, and ran in the southeast direction, as he ran under a giant tree, hoping the bird wouldn't follow him, when suddenly a bee's nest fell on his head. He screamed, and wailed, and flailed, as he was rapidly getting stung by bees. He fell in a puddle of mud head-first, still being stung. The muddy water began to fill the beehive, with the bees dying off eventually. As he pulled off the beehive, he stood up and regained his balance when suddenly a bunch of criminals came in from all directions towards him, mistaking him for a hippie. "Gimme us all of yo loot, you hippy punk!" the leader of the gang said, as they then beat Banunuh mercilessly, stealing all of his belongings. When the criminals left, Banunuh then reached up and moaned in immense pain. He was covered in bruises, and his robe was torn up. "Well, I better book it. I can't stay in public like this…" As he was on his way, a bright neon sign caught his attention. "Thou want Bananas? Thou must enter The Forest of Vast Pain and Suffering…" the sign read. "Wow. This is a lucky coincidence, despite the crabby day I've been having!" he said, as he ran in the northeast direction into the Forest of Vast Pain and Suffering, completely ignoring the fact that there was a "Do not Enter…" sign in front of the place. This couldn't end well for Banunuh.

"Oh well, knowing Banunuh, he's fine. He's quite the world traveler, anyway." Malaria commented. "Oh yes, that's right. When Banunuh left, I asked him if he could get me some cottage cheese along the way." Ike stated. "You must really like cottage cheese," Malaria commented as she waved her left index finger in front of her. "Young Link, are you STILL staring at me?" Althaia said, as she folded her arms. "I can't help it! It's just that the fact that you're moving! My eyes have to stare at any moving object!" Young Link exclaimed. "Well, that's starting to freak me out, Link. Could you stop it?" Althaia said. "AH! My docodytis! I can't…stop…staring!" Young Link panicked as he was still glaring to no end at Althaia. "Ooh! I know what to do!" Peach exclaimed cheerfully as she clasped her hands together, as she approached Young Link. "Uh…Peach? What are you doing…?" Young Link said in nervous tone of voice. Peach then knocked Young Link to the ground with her butt, sitting on his face. "Sorry, sweetie. This will definitely hurt me more than it will hurt you…." Peach stated calmly, as she then farted in massive portions on Young Link's face, with him shrieking in horror. Malaria, Althaia, and Ike could only watch, as they then shuddered in disgust. After a matter of seconds, Young Link went unconscious, his left leg twitching. Peach then stood off of him, as she dusted off her dress, suddenly beginning to weep due to her vile actions. "Double-ya tee eff?!" Malaria exclaimed as her left eye twitched uncontrollably. "A bit harsh, but at least he's not staring at me anymore." Althaia said, as she shrugged. "Man, talk about embarrassing…seeing the so-called older version of me farting around with no shame is starting to make me blush…" Baby Peach admitted as she was, in fact, blushing as she removed her crown, scratching her head. "So let's see…Young Link has docodytis, Roy's pyromania has been pretty strong today, Ike seems to have a cottage cheese addiction, and Peach is farting now. What next?" Malaria commented as she shrugged, when suddenly Princess Daisy popped out from thin air, wearing her usual orange and yellow dress. "Hi I'm Daisy! Hi I'm Daisy! Hi I'm Daisy! Hi I'm-" "WE GET IT!" everyone except for Peach snapped at the annoying yellow-clad princess, who then gasped in disbelief as she folded her arms. "Hey, no need to go all stupid on me! YEESH!" Daisy retorted as she folded her arms. "Were where you?" Malaria asked as she straightened out her dark blue cloak. "I was in the bathroom. Where else would I have been?" Daisy sarcastically remarked. "It's funny that you, Princess Daisy, is the author's favorite character, yet she treats you like crabbage," Althaia commented as she smirked. What? I'd never treat the fairest princess in the universe, Princess Daisy like crabbage. I'll show you! And then magically, Princess Daisy was wrapped in a luminescent light, and then she was wearing the prettiest dress the world's ever seen, with pretty buttons and sparkly ribbons, and bright gold, yellow, orange and green accents. And she had a crown made out of beautiful flowers, and her hair was amazingly long; all the way to the floor. All of the characters gasped as they were shocked (and or jealous) of Daisy's joie de vivre. Daisy gasped as she placed her hands up to her face as she blushed. "W-wow! I feel like…like a queen! Are these golden glass slippers?! Amazing!" Daisy exclaimed gleefully, as she was so bright and sunny that the whole room lit up. Princess Rosalina then came out from upstairs, carrying a tall stack of books in her arms. "Hey, can someone help me get these books downstairs? I-" Rosalina then looked to see Daisy, as she dropped her stack of books on the floor as she covered her mouth. "My word! Holy Grand Stars! Is that…Daisy?! But she used to look so awkward! And now she's like an angel!" Rosalina shouted in an unnaturally squeaky voice that even made Peach's voice seem deep. Then, a random portal opened that showed a beautiful, desert oasis with a giant, glorious castle was right in front of Daisy. "Your palace awaits, Queen Daisy. Rule it now," a voice said that was heard. Daisy gasped as she covered her mouth. "I'm simply flattered! Oh my, is this my own castle? I haven't had one since 1989! Oh, joyous day!" Daisy exclaimed cheerfully, as she leaped into the portal. Peach was fuming with anger, as she folded her arms and scowled. "Ooh! That stupid Daisy thinks she's better than me!" Peach said as she tensed her shoulders and gritted her teeth. Everyone then begin to laugh at Peach. "Aw… she doesn't get it," Rosalina commented teasingly as she wrapped her arm around Peach's shoulders. "Don't be too jealous of Daisy. You're Miss Nintendo anyway, Peach. Daisy would probably never have anything like that going on for her in Nintendo, so this part of the fanfiction is a getaway for her," Rosalina told Peach. "So what do I get in this fanfiction?" Peach asked. "Bad gas, apparently." Althaia remarked as she snickered, when she suddenly burst out laughing, and so did the other fictional characters eventually, with Peach folding her arms and whimpering as she pouted. "Stop! It's not funny…" Peach said as she let out a deep-pitched poot, blushing as she felt dejected.

Banunuh was traversing his way through The Forest of Vast Pain and Suffering, with him humming the song Happy. "Hey, this forest isn't really painful. Man, getting them bananas will be a pizza cake!" Banunuh commented confidently, as he nodded his head in assurance. Suddenly, someone with a bold New York accent then shouted from seemingly nowhere, "Hey, that's my line!" Banunuh then leaped several feet into the air as he landed back down, trembling. "Who…who said that?!" Banunuh said in fear, looking about frantically. "Who'd ya think it was? It was me!" said Falco Lombardi, as he then came out of the deep, dark grotto of the forest south of Banunuh. "Oh," Banunuh casually said, resuming his adventure in the woodsy forest. "Wait…that's it?" Falco said as he scratched his head with his left wing. Banunuh then gawked at Falco who was behind him. "Well, actually yes. This IS The Forest of Vast Pain and Suffering. I mean, I wouldn't be surprised if I ran into Jake from StateFarm in here," He said, leaving Falco behind who was about to say something, but just shrugged. "Man, I'm still wondering how I got in this place, anyway…" Falco said to himself.

"Is it me, or is this chapter maybe the best chapter since chapter 1?" Malaria commented randomly, with most of the fictional characters agreeing with her. "Yeah. Even though I wasn't in this fanfiction by that time, I still agree with you!" Toad exclaimed. "Though…in chapter 1, I don't think Peach was farting this much," Althaia stated, as she pointed at Peach, who let out a loud, brassy fart as she blushed. "Oh dear…This is really starting to get embarrassing…" Peach said as she farted once more, gasping as she covered her mouth, her blush getting even redder. "Wait…isn't Pink Gold Peach and Baby Peach supposed to pass gas every time Peach does? 0_0" Malaria asked as she realized that, removing her small blue hat and scratching her hair. "Well, that's because we're not actually Peach-" Pink Gold Peach then grabbed Baby Peach and covered her mouth, shushing her. "We just don't, okay?" Pink Gold Peach said. "But how come you don't?" Malaria asked once more. "We just don't, okay?!" Pink Gold Peach said again. "Why not? 0_0" Malaria said. "We just DON'T, OKAY?!" Pink Gold Peach snapped at Malaria in a deep, demonic voice, with Malaria throwing her hands in the air as she shrieked. Everyone then stopped what they were doing to give Pink Gold Peach an odd glare. "Pink Gold Peach, you gotta control your anger! And yay, that was my first line in this chapter!" Baby Rosalina said as she clapped her hands together. Suddenly, the TV then emitted a bright multi-colored light towards Toad, as he was then lifted up by it. "Oh no!" Toad screamed very over-exaggeratedly, as he got sucked back into the Realm of Fiction, his role in this fanfiction coming to an abrupt end. "Oh no Toad!" Peach shrieked as she covered her mouth, farting loudly. "Well…he was kinda just always there, so I couldn't really care less," said Baby Rosalina. "Yeah, I'll have to agree with you there, Baby Rosalina." Roy commented as he was now burning a marshmallow on the tip of his sword, munching on the sticky, charred substance. Our now fourteen heroes were sitting in the living room, doing nothing. And the nothingness the living room held caused quite a silence…"NOBODY FART!" Malaria screamed to the top of her lungs, and stood up. "Aw…" Peach, Roy, and Young Link said in disappointment. "The author needs to stop making references to previous chapters so early on," said Baby Rosalina. "True." Althaia said. "I'm totes bored…" Malaria said bluntly, as she slumped over on the couch armchair. "Let's sing The Nothing Song!" Marth said out of nowhere. "O…" all of the videogame characters said for an extended period of time. Then Young Link appeared on top of the couch from his unconscious state. "Hey All You People," he said in a harmonious tone. "Hey All You People," he said once more. "Won't you all listen to me?" said Rosalina as she stood on the couch cushion. "Hey All You People," Roy said as he stood on top of the couch next to Young Link. "Hey All You People," he said once more. "I've got a song for all you to hear and see!" Baby Rosalina sang cheerfully as she stood next to Rosalina. "A song of NOTHING!" Roy yelled as he threw his hands into the air, as Marth and Ike then chimed "A song of NOTHING!" in unison. Then, all of the videogame characters begin to dance in line while singing "A song of NOTHING! Tra lala la NOTHING!" they all shouted as a saxophone could be heard in harmony of their singing. "Instead of sitting here and being lame," Baby Rosalina sung as Baby Daisy then popped out from behind her "let's sing a song about fortune and fame!" she said. "And it's also about the poor and rich!" Ike chimed. "Not to mention about Lyn my girlfriend who's a witch," Roy sung as he popped out next to Ike while dancing. "And about the monkey who I met in a _ditch-_a!" Baby Rosalina then carried an extremely long note as she fell on her back. "Oh hey, it's not about any of those things!" Young Link said. "Because it's the song of NOTHING!" Pink Gold Peach and Peach both said as they were both carrying a top hat, as Baby Peach popped out of the top hat and sung "The song of NOTHING!" "Tra lala la nothing!" everyone then sang, with Malaria, Althaia, and Samyatang all standing there in absolute shock. "To the right you see" Baby Rosalina said as she looked right as Baby Peach and Baby Daisy clapped in rhythm and said "Nothing!" "To the left you see" Young Link said as he looked left as Baby Daisy and Ike clapped in rhythm and said "Nothing!" "Up there you see" Rosalina said as she looked up, with Pink Gold Peach and Peach clapping in rhythm as they said "Nothing!" "Down you see" Roy said as he looked down as Marth and Ike clapped in rhythm as they said "Nothing!" "All around you see" Baby Rosalina, Young Link, Rosalina, and Roy said in harmony as Baby Peach, Baby Daisy, Ike, Marth, Roy, Rosalina, Peach, and Pink Gold Peach all clapped in rhythm and said "Nothing!" "The song of the nothing!" they all said. "A song of nothing!" They all began to dance. "Tra lala la nothing!" they said. "Nothing! Tra la lala nothing! Tra lala la nothing! La lala nothing!" they sung. "Tra lala la nothing! Tra lala la nothing! The song of nothing! Oh haha ha nothing!" they sung in unison. "Nothing!" Roy said. "Nothing!" Baby Rosalina said. "Nothing!" Young Link said. "No…thing!" Rosalina sang as hard as she could, as the song then came to an end. Malaria, Althaia, and Samyatang then began to clap and throw all sorts of flowers at them, even shedding tears of joy. "That…was simply beautiful!" Malaria said as she wiped a tear out of her eye.

Meanwhile in the desert oasis, Princess Daisy, who was clad in a royal sundress, was relaxing on her balcony, enjoying the refreshing desert breeze, looking down at the sparkling water, the sunlight perfectly reflecting off the water creating the perfect atmosphere. Daisy sighed in enjoyment, taking in all of the scenery. "Ah…it sure is a lovely day," Princess Daisy commented as she sipped on her sparkling lemonade, putting it down next to her. "I wish I could always have my own desert oasis!" Daisy then groaned as she folded her arms as she shook her head. "Glad the author bailed me out. I was getting tired of hearing Peach's obnoxious farting, anyway," she said. Daisy kept looking at the deep, beautiful oasis in front of her, surrounded by palm trees. Daisy then grinned as she felt her daring side kick in. "Say, what if I…" she said to herself. "Got it!" she exclaimed as she snapped her fingers, running back into her bedroom. Coming out in a matter seconds, Daisy was clad in a yellow one-piece swimsuit with flower accents, her hair now tied up in a ponytail. With full speed, Daisy leaped off of the balcony. "Woohoo! CANNONBALL!" she yelled as she curled up and splashed into the pure water, resurfacing. She then spit out water as her long, silky hair was sopping wet. "Aw yeah, awesome!" Daisy exclaimed as she fist-pumped. She then lied back in the water with her arms folded behind her head. "Oh yes. This is the life…I have my own castle, a private oasis, and butlers at my disposal…" she said to herself. "It's as if nothing could possibly go wrong!" she exclaimed as she caressed the fresh, oasis air. Suddenly, a giant whirlpool then formed in the water, as Daisy gasped and covered her mouth with her hands. "Oh no! What in the world is happening?!" she exclaimed frantically, as she was getting sucked in the water, as she screamed. "Luigi!" she called out randomly as she reached her right arm out, albeit unexpectedly, being sucked completely into the whirlpool, as it then closed up without a trace of Daisy. Luigi was sitting on his couch in his apartment, watching TV and eating a bowl of pasta, as he then heard his name being called out by Princess Daisy. Luigi shrugged as he couldn't care less, continuing to eat his pasta. "She-a can save-a herself for once-a," Luigi commented, although this was the first time Daisy ever called on his help.

Banunuh was walking through the Forest of Vast Pain and Suffering, as he was still thinking about the bananas. "I need my happy food," he commented. "I still have the images of this madness in my head…ugh…" he said, shaking his head, implying Peach's farting dilemma. Banunuh shook his head. "Man, that's weird stuff." Suddenly, Banunuh heard shuffling in the bushes, as he stood on guard. "Who goes there?" Banunuh said, now using his refined knight voice. A cute little bunny rabbit then hopped out of the bushes, minding its own business. Banunuh sighed as he wiped the sweat off his forehead, sighing of relief. "It's just a bunny," he said. Back on his adventure, he was avoiding tree branches, leaves and vines, and dips and holes. "Man, this forest sure is besmirched…" he said, as he accidentally tore his robe as he gasped. "Great…well, this robe is doomed…" he said. "Why do I talk to myself so much? Maybe it helps me forget the fact that I'm in a forest that's said to be associated with vast pain and suffering," he commented to himself. While Banunuh was walking, now paying close attention the scenery of the forest, he walked into cobweb. He looked in front of him, as he shrieked like a girl as a tarantula was on his face. "Hoo hoo, get it off11 Get it off! Get it off! Oh my glob! Ah!" he screamed as he was frantically swinging his head around. His hood came off as he started flinging his hair around, as the song I Wave My Hair Back and Forth started playing randomly. When Banunuh was going crazy, he rolled down a long slope with all sorts of bumps and nicks. While he was rolling violently, his robe got stuck on a root, as his robe tore even more. He began to choke as the root was snagging his robe by his neck, as he was trying to pry it off. He was hacking and gagging and wheezing. "Mother Nature…is trying to do me in!" he cried, as he was struggling and flailing and kicking. He managed to stand up to his feet and run in place, as the fabric tore, causing him to launch off down the slope, falling on his back and spinning really fast. He then spread out in an X pose, as he slammed into a tree with acorns rapidly falling onto his head. He went unconscious for about three seconds, as he groggily got back on his feet. "Oh man, that was an ordeal…" he said as he rubbed his head, dusting himself off. "I hope I don't completely tear my robe off in this wacky adventure. That would be a mockery towards my existence," Banunuh commented, continuing his adventure.

Our thirteen heroes were in The House of the Dreaded Cousins (?), doing virtually nothing. Marth was trying his best not to doze off; Ike was sitting in the feeble position in a lone corner, craving cottage cheese, Roy was burning random food with his sword, Rosalina was reading a storybook to Baby Rosalina, Baby Daisy was watching TV, Pink Gold Peach was sitting next to Baby Peach and Princess Peach, who kept farting, much to their disgust. Samyatang was chanting as she began to levitate off the ground, Althaia was painting a beautiful portrait of the famous Mona Lisa, Young Link was staring at random things, and Malaria was talking on the phone with someone. Peach farted loudly as Baby Peach and Pink Gold Peach groaned in disgust, scooting over as far away from Peach as possible. "Excuse me…" Peach said as she blushed, now feeling heavily embarrassed. "Peach, PLEASE stop farting. That is just annoying now…" Marth commented. "Sorry…I just can't seem to control my gas right now," Peach admitted as she farted again. "I…need…m-my…cottage…cHeEsE…" Ike said in a monotone, possessed voice, with everyone giving him awkward glares. Peach was about to say something, but was cut off by her own loud, disgusting fart, blushing madly. "Can't you see we're trying to read?" Rosalina said, as she folded her arms. "Yeah! Reading requires quietness!" Baby Rosalina stated as she also folded her arms. "Then go to a library, then!" Roy exclaimed, as he continued to burn things. "For the last time Robert, Bigfoot is real. Finding Bigfoot is just too lazy to hunt him down. I've seen Bigfoot, even you seen Bigfoot; end of story." Malaria said to the person on the phone, hanging up. "Still couldn't convince Bob that Bigfoot is real?" Althaia said as she continued to paint the picture. "Nope. As I said before, once a Bob, always a Bob. A lot of the things Bob do prove that point valid." Malaria commented. Roy noticed that Peach seemed to be farting to no end, as it was getting on his nerves. Gritting his teeth, he went over there to where Peach was. He shoveled her up with his sword as she gasped; now sitting on his sword. Accidentally farting loudly, Roy's sword emitted flames as an explosion happened, as Roy and Peach screamed to their fiery dooms, both of their roles in this fanfiction coming to an abrupt end. "NO. JUST NO. YOU CAN'T KILL OFF ROY AND PEACH." Althaia stated as she pointed at the ceiling. Pink Gold Peach and Baby Peach began to cry, hugging each other tightly as they did. "She was so young!" Baby Peach cried. "Now without her, our lives have no meaning!" Pink Gold Peach cried. "This is my fault. I should have listened to Roy when he told me to beat my addiction with cottage cheese…" Ike said as he tilted his head down, shaking his head in grief. "Seriously man. Without Peach or Roy, I'm quitting this fanfiction." Baby Daisy said. "Are you all serious? Roy is just an obnoxious flamethrower, and Peach is just a gassy princess. Can't you all move on?" Marth said, as he folded his arms. "SHUT THE FOO UP!" everyone basically roared at Marth, who then hit the wall from the pressure of their yells. So because everyone had negative feedback about Roy and Peach dying, they then came back in a magical poof of…magic. Roy was just standing there, burning things as if nothing happened, and Peach was still farting up a storm. Althaia, Young Link and Ike ran up to Roy and hugged him tightly. "Roy!" they said in unison. They then caught on fire from being too close to his sword, but after a few short seconds they began hugging him again. Malaria, Pink Gold Peach, Baby Daisy and Baby Peach ran up to Peach and hugged her tightly. "Peach!" they said in unison, with Peach accidentally farting loudly as she blushed, with Malaria, Pink Gold Peach, Baby Peach and Baby Daisy still hugging her tightly. Samyatang, Baby Rosalina and Rosalina came into the room as they noticed everyone hugging, finding the sudden display of affection very confusing. "You leave for two minutes in this fanfiction, and you're totally lost," Rosalina said, with Baby Rosalina nodding her head in agreement.

Samyatang floated next to the two blue-clad girls. "Talk about weird," she muttered. "Tell me about it." Rosalina said as she folded her arms with a dull look on her face. "Yeah." Baby Rosalina said.

Princess Daisy was screaming as she was falling with all of the rushing water as she was going through a tube of some sort. Her cries were being muffled by the water, as she kept falling down. She even tried swimming back up, but to no avail. She saw that a bright light was getting closer and closer. _Oh no…is this the light?_ _**THE**__ light?__**!**_ Daisy thought to herself. She closed her eyes tight as she hugged herself tightly. She then came out of the tube as she fell on a leafy tree branch as she bounced off as she gasped, landing on a lower tree branch. She landed on one more thick, leafy tree branch as she flipped over, falling as she yelled, landing on a soft, cushiony surface butt-first, all of the water from the oasis flooding the area. Daisy then wringed out her sopping wet hair, spitting out water, as tiny water droplets fell from the thick trees' leaves above her. "Oh my, what a surprise!" Daisy exclaimed as she covered her mouth in shock. She looked around the grotto, which was quite beautiful with the streaming water, and the lit torches. Daisy clasped her hands together as she took in the scenery. "My! What a beautiful grotto!" she exclaimed, now to notice that she was sitting on a throne made of soft leaves and flowers. "Well, I better find my way outta here. I'm in unknown territory!" she thought. As she hopped out of her seat, she gasped when she noticed that she was barefoot. "Oh wait, that was almost a mistake," she said to herself as she curled back up in the chair, looking down. "I could get pricked on these vines and twigs in my path!" she said. "I guess I'll have to wait for someone to come and rescue me," Daisy commented. Daisy's stomach growled loudly, as she gasped. "Aw man, I'm hungry!" Where am I gonna find something to eat in the middle of nowhere?" Daisy said, as she folded her arms and closed her eyes. As if on cue, a basket of bananas landed right in her arms. "Whoa—what kind of luck do I have today? Sweet!" she exclaimed, peeling off the banana peel, munching on the savory, ripe bananas. Eventually, she ate all of the bananas, as she tossed the basket full of now banana peels behind her. "That sure was satisfying! But now, I have to get out of this place. Guess I'm pulling a Peach and calling for help. Someone help me!" Daisy shouted with her hands over her mouth. "Help! Help!" she yelled. "Someone get me outta here!" she yelled. "If I shout for help enough, someone's definitely going to find me!" she said.

Banunuh was pushing hanging leaves and twigs out of his face, groaning in annoyance. "Shouldn't they call this The Jungle of Vast Pain and Suffering? Last time I checked, forests don't even have bananas…" he commented in realization. "Sometime tells me that a letdown is in store…but I'll keep going, anyway." Banunuh commented, as he proceeded to navigate his way through the tricky trails of The Forest of Vast Pain and Suffering, hoping to get his hands on some bananas. Banunuh yawned in boredom, starting to get fed up with the area. Suddenly, a grizzly bear then jumped out from a bunch of thick trees as it roared ferociously at Banunuh. Banunuh yelled as he ran as fast as he could, as the grizzly bear was hot on his trail, chomping and slashing at him. "I just wanted some bananas!" he yelled, as he was running as fast as he could. There was a giant dip in the path. Running super fast, Banunuh leaped as far as he could, even going sideways and scuttling as he grabbed onto the cliff, groggily pulling himself up. He was panting as he felt his heart rate go up, as he ran. After two minutes of straight running, he started slowing down dramatically. He placed his hands on his knees as he doubled over, panting as sweat poured down from his hood. "I think I…huh…lost it," he said as he looked behind himself. "I just feel like…booking it…" he said as he fell on his stomach with his arms to his side, almost passing out in the middle of the forest. Suddenly, a group of monkeys began to make their noises, swinging off of branches and vines past Banunuh. Banunuh then gasped as he stood to his feet. "EGAD! Monkeys! Of course!" he shouted. "They must be going to the bananas! Brilliant!" he said. "I must become one with the monkeys and follow them!" he exclaimed, as he leaped into the trees with the monkeys, swinging around on the vines and branches, just like the monkeys. "Ooh ooh ah ah! Woo woo woo! Woo woo wo—" he then fell into a puddle of mud, as he then burst out again, making exaggerated monkey noises, jumping around in the trees once again. After five minutes of leaping around, there were at least twenty monkeys in the trees next to Banunuh. He gasped as he spotted a bright light coming from a grotto, with giant leaves and vines covering the entrance. He accidentally fell from the trees, face-first in some water that was streaming from a grotto. He laughed as he got up quickly. Laughing like a stalker, Banunuh ran as fast as he could, pushing through the thick leaves and hanging branches as fast as he could. He then saw a bright yellow color reflecting off of the water, as the water was streaming through the grotto. "Sweet bananas!" he yelled, as he ran, falling into the water. "Bananas!" he gargled from the water, resurfacing. He then heard giggling, as he looked in front of him. "Bananas…?" he said as he looked forward, to see Princess Daisy—who he thought was a beautiful forest queen—giggling as the monkeys were crowding her, giving her all sorts of offerings and such, as Banunuh's jaw dropped. "Is it the fabled…Mother Nature? Or is it the daughter of Mother Nature, Queen Nature? How? How?!" he yelled, watching in disbelief as the monkeys kept giving Daisy things, including ripe, golden-hued bananas. She then saw Banunuh, as she gasped in delight, waving her left hand cheerfully at him. "Hi I'm Daisy! Are you a huntsman out to save me?" Daisy asked as she clasped her hands together. "Wait…what?! Princess Daisy?! How in the?!" he yelled. "Who are you?" Daisy said. "I'm Banunuh! Remember me? I was at Malaria and Althaia's place!" Banunuh commented as he swam over towards Daisy, pulling himself up to the pedestal the throne Daisy was sitting on was. "Oh! My, but you look so…different! What has happened to you?" Daisy asked, as she placed her hands on her knees. "Well, I was actually on a search for bananas. This place had many trials, resulting in my corrupt attire and such. This is the Forest of Vast Pain and Suffering, so yeah. And what about you? You're beautiful!" Banunuh commented, as he wringed out his soaked clothing. Daisy blushed as she giggled, "Why, thank you! The author made me over, so that's why I look like this!" Daisy said. "Jeez, you stink!" Daisy exclaimed obnoxiously, pointing at Banunuh. "Ugh, I just HATE stenches! I'll make you smell pretty—like me!" Daisy exclaimed as she leaped out of her seat, with bright yellow petals surrounding her. She then shot out a blast of all sorts of good-smelling flowers on Banunuh, who screamed in fear. He fell back into the water. He resurfaced about five seconds later, with Daisy laughing. "Haha! That's better! You almost smell as good as me!" Daisy commented boastfully with her hands on her hips, as she was standing up in her throne. "Actually, you don't smell nearly as good as me! Just saying!" she said. Banunuh rolled his eyes, as he folded his arms. "Maybe I don't want to smell as good as you. In fact, you smell so good, you kinda stink!" Banunuh remarked, as Daisy gasped in disbelief. "You better be glad I'm in such an incredibly amazing mood right now; otherwise I'd beat you to a pulp!" she exclaimed, as she folded her arms. Banunuh then looked around and said, "Hey, princess, you wouldn't happen to have any bananas, would you?" Banunuh asked the plucky princess. "Ooh, bananas? Nope! Sorry! Just ate the last of 'em!" she exclaimed cheerfully. "Awh!" he yelled as he fell to his knees, dropping his hands to the ground. "That's what my whole adventure was for!" he yelled as he covered his face with both hands. "Whoa, calm down, Banunuh! I can just get ya some!" Daisy said. "Hey! Monkeys!" she yelled out. The monkeys then popped out from the trees, blinking. "Go get him some bananas, please!" Daisy shouted. The monkeys then went back into the trees. A few moments later, they returned and showered Banunuh in delicious golden bananas, as he screamed in joy and fear. He popped his head out of the pile of bananas. "Bananas!" Banunuh yelled, as he started as he started to devour the bananas. "Happy food! Happy food!" he screamed as his mouth was filled with bananas. In a matter of minutes, all of the bananas were gone. Banunuh belched loudly, as he let out a sigh of satisfaction. "Yeah, that hit the spot. Now we can get the crabbage outta here!" Banunuh exclaimed. "Let's go!" Daisy exclaimed cheerfully as she leaped into the water. Banunuh then jumped into water also. As Banunuh and Daisy were swimming through the water, Banunuh suddenly screamed in pain. "OH SNAP! CRAMP!" he said as he sank underwater. "Help me!" he screamed as he went back into the water. Daisy gasped. "Don't worry! I'll save you!" Daisy exclaimed as she gasped and held her breath, and dived into the water, doing a torpedo dive towards Banunuh, who was sinking underwater. She grabbed him and swam back up to the top of the water. "Breathe! Breathe!" Daisy yelled as she whapped him in the back, as he then spit out lots of water, flapping about like a crazy person. "Round two, baby! Haw!" she yelled as she elbowed him in the back, as he tossed up more water. "You saved me, princess! You are the EXACT opposite of Peach!" Banunuh commented. "Well, I wouldn't say I'm EXACTLY different from Peach…" Daisy said. "Well, you don't call for help, you don't wear pink…" Banunuh said. "Hey, I do call for help! I called for help at least for fifteen minutes straight today… And I do wear pink!" Daisy exclaimed as she folded her arms. "Well, you don't…fart." Banunuh said. "Who's to say I don't pass gas?" Daisy admitted, as she farted loudly, bubbles resurfacing from behind her in the water. "Okay, let's just swim out of here before you start letting loose like crazy," Banunuh commented. "Sure!" Daisy said, as she then grabbed him, and then swam really quickly. Banunuh screamed, as the tomboyish princess was swimming herself and him to the surface. They then popped up, and Banunuh was breathing heavily and coughing, spitting out water. They then climbed out, as Daisy then shrieked. "What's wrong? 0_0" Banunuh asked Daisy. "I don't have any shoes! You gotta carry me!" Daisy said, as she leaped into Banunuh's arms. Banunuh then smiled as he chuckled. "Not only did I get those bananas, but I get to carry a hot princess in a swimsuit? Sweet." Banunuh said. Daisy blushed as she groaned, feeling self-conscious. "If I had shoes on, I would totally kick your butt!" Daisy exclaimed. "Can I grope yours?" Banunuh said teasingly, as Daisy gasped in disbelief, and then frowned. A viewing of outside the forest could be seen, as a loud, distinctive punch noise was heard, and a scream from Banunuh. Back inside the forest, Banunuh had a busted lip and a black eye, with an overgrown flower stuffed in his mouth. "Now shut your trap and keep moving!" she yelled at him. "Yes ma'am," he said in a muffled voice.

"Okay, you take it…you take it…you take it…you take the Oreo…you take da Oreo…" Malaria commented as she was trying to give Pink Gold Peach an Oreo cookie. Pink Gold Peach gave Malaria a weird glare, like she was crazy. "Just show me how to eat it!" Pink Gold Peach exclaimed as she folded her arms. "I DID! I DID SHOW YOU HOW TO EAT IT LIKE TEN TIMES ALREADY! YOU TAKE THE OREO COOKIE, YOU TAKE THE COOKIE OFF, AND YOU LICK THE CREAM OFF, AND THEN YOU EAT THE REST!" Malaria yelled as she began to pant, as she threw her hands in the air. "Sweetie, go get you some rest, okay?" Pink Gold Peach said to Malaria as she placed her hands on Malaria's shoulders. "I aIn'T tIrEd YeT" Malaria said, as she threw her hands in the air. "What do you mean by yet?" Pink Gold Peach asked. "It doesn't matter! Just take the Oreo." Malaria said, as she handed Pink Gold Peach the Oreo. "Now, do as I do…" Malaria said, as she raised the Oreo. Pink Gold Peach also raised the Oreo. Malaria opened the Oreo. Pink Gold Peach opened the Oreo. Malaria licks the Oreo. Pink Gold Peach stares at the Oreo. Malaria licks the Oreo again. Pink Gold Peach still stares at the Oreo. Malaria licks the Oreo…again. Pink Gold Peach yelled as she smashed the Oreo on her forehead. "Ooh hoo, whee!" Pink Gold Peach squealed as her left eye twitched, as she was laughing like a crazy person. "Okay, she needs her pill," Baby Peach said as she pulled out a white-colored pill out of her pocket, and pulled out a cup of orange juice. "C'mon, down the hatch, Pink Gold Peach." Baby Peach said. "No! I don't wanna!" Pink Gold Peach exclaimed. Baby Peach groaned. "Just take the stupid pill, Pink Gold Peach!" Baby Peach said. "Nope!" Pink Gold Peach said as she folded her arms and turned away from the pill. "If you don't take it, I'll make ya!" Baby Peach exclaimed as she began to chase Pink Gold Peach with the pill. "No! That pill is bad for me!" she exclaimed. "No! The pill is good for you!" Baby Peach exclaimed, as Pink Gold Peach hid behind the couch. "Baby Peach, just crunch up the pill in the orange juice. That might work," Roy whispered to Baby Peach. "Brilliant! Roy, you're a genius!" Baby Peach exclaimed. Grabbing the pill, she grinded it up into powder in her hands, and poured it into the orange juice. "You don't have to take the pill, Pink Gold Peach," Baby Peach said. "Woo!" Pink Gold Peach exclaimed as she came from under the couch. "Want some orange juice?" Baby Peach said. "Yes!" Pink Gold Peach said as she snatched the orange juice from Baby Peach, drinking it down. Pink Gold Peach then spat the orange juice all over Baby Peach, who screamed. "It burns! It burns! Orange juice…in my eyes!" she screamed as she began to break-dance for no apparent reason. "Haggle cough strangle hackle gaggle gag cough hack! I see what you're trying to do! You're trying to kill me! I'm not taking that pill!" Pink Gold Peach exclaimed, as she pointed at Baby Peach. "My eyes! My eyes! Eyes! Eyes! Gack! Whoa! No-no-no! Oh, ohhh-a!" Baby Peach screamed as she flapped on the floor, screaming like a mad women. Princess Peach Toadstool then randomly farted loudly, as she blushed. "Why is the author making me go through this…?" Peach said aloud. "Because she hates you." Malaria stated. "Hates you." Althaia said, for emphasis. "No she doesn't!" Peach said. "Yes she does." Malaria said. "N-no… no she doesn't!" Peach whimpered, as she began to sniffle. "The author hates you, the author hates you!" Malaria and Althaia said as they mocked Peach, who began to cry. "Prove it!" Peach exclaimed as she stood up, pointing at Althaia, then Malaria. "She's a member of Anti-Princess Peach," Malaria stated, as Peach gasped. "Yup. Not only that, but she only added you to this fanfiction so you can be tortured," Althaia commented. Peach pooted again, this time her dress puffing completely up. Peach blushed madly, as everyone groaned in disgust, pointing towards the bathroom. "Go," they all said, as Peach sighed as she held her dress and went into the bathroom. "Peach sure is gassy…" Baby Rosalina commented sheepishly, as she rubbed the back of her head. "I used to be gassy, but I begged the author to spare me," Pink Gold Peach commented. "I still am gassy. I just don't let loose that much because I'm around so much fire," Roy admitted, as he in fact, farted loudly, with everyone groaning in disgust. "Can everyone just stop farting? We don't want to give this fanfiction a T-rating…" Malaria said, with a lot of other characters agreeing. "But it's not like the author has an obsession with farting, she just wears it out because it's funny." Althaia commented.

Banunuh and Princess Daisy were trying to find their way out of The Forest of Vast Pain and Suffering, with Banunuh now giving Daisy a piggyback ride. "Jeez, you're a lot heavier than you look…" Banunuh commented as he tried his best to keep going forward. "Are you trying to call me chubby?!" Princess Daisy retorted as she placed her hands on her hips. Banunuh gasped, as he didn't want to get punched for the fifth time. "I would never! Never no, milady, my fairest!" Banunuh exclaimed, using his refined knight voice. "Oh, I thought so!" Daisy happily replied as she smiled. "Now let's get moving!" Daisy exclaimed gleefully, as Banunuh groaned in weakness, trying to move with the plucky princess on his back. There were all sorts of animals giving Daisy offerings, such as assorted wild berries, bananas, flowers, decorated pinecones, and such. "Oh wow, thank you!" Daisy exclaimed as she placed on a necklace a grizzly bear had just given her, made out of vines, flowers acorns and pinecones. "Why do you get so much stuff?" Banunuh asked. "It must be because of my beauty!" Princess Daisy exclaimed. "I never asked until now, but how did you even get in this forest?" Banunuh asked Daisy, who was snacking on some wild berries. "Funny story, actually," Daisy said as she gulped down the rest of the berries. "I was just at my desert kingdom and—" "Whoa whoa whoa, hold the invisible telephone! Since when do you have a kingdom?!" Banunuh asked in shock, as Daisy chuckled. "Oh, silly you! I've always had a kingdom! You know, Sarasaland?" Daisy said. "Hmm, nope." Banunuh said, as he shook his head. "From Super Mario Land?" Daisy said bluntly, with a dull look on her face. "Uh-uh. Doesn't ring a bell." Banunuh said as he shrugged "Oh, just forget it, then. Well, the desert kingdom I was just at a couple of moments ago wasn't the kingdom I'm familiar with—it was some other place. Don't tell nobody, but I think this one is better. There's an oasis, a waterfall, a giant castle, plenty of pools, a beautiful garden. There's even butlers at my service 24/7, an indoor ice cream parlor with every flavor imaginable, and there's also a-" "Can you just tell me how you got here already?" Banunuh said bluntly. "Oops, I digressed! Back to the point, I decided to go for a swim in the oasis, when suddenly the oasis was drained of its water! I didn't know what would happen to me, so I thought I was a goner! But suddenly, I fell into that grotto that we were just at! Not much else to tell you, really." Daisy said. "How'd you get to that desert kingdom?" Banunuh asked. "Oh yeah! Silly me; I forgot to tell you how that happened. I guess the authors smiled down on me, because I was randomly wrapped in some light, and the next thing you know, I was adorned in some fancy-schmancy dress! Then this portal opened up, showing a beautiful desert kingdom, and I just leaped right on in! And the rest is history!" Daisy exclaimed. "You don't say…" Banunuh said. "If you ask me, the blocks are smiling at me. I've had a weird day today," Banunuh commented. "Weird? How so?" Daisy asked him. "Well, it all started off like this…" Banunuh said.

-FLASHBACK-

_It was early in the morning, as everyone was asleep in the game room. Banunuh was snoring loudly, as he then heard what he thought was someone playing a tuba directly in his left ear. But, Banunuh felt a plush texture on his ear, so he decided to see what it was. To his horror when he opened his eyes, he realized that Princess Peach Toadstool was farting directly in his ear! Banunuh screamed as he flew off of the floor like he was on fire, screaming like a little girl. Ike then hit his head on a open drawer above his head, groaning in immense pain. Princess Peach herself then woke up as she gasped, farting loudly. "Oh my, what's happening?!" she exclaimed frantically. "Like you don't know! You farted in my ear! Not cool, man! NOT! COOL!" Banunuh snapped at the blonde-haired princess, who covered her mouth in disbelief. "Oh my…I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to…" Peach said. "Great, now I need my happy food…" Banunuh said. "Me too," Ike commented as he basically appeared behind Peach and Banunuh, as they both turned around and shrieked, with Peach letting out a squeaky poot. "Okay, what's your happy food, Ike?" Banunuh asked. "Cottage cheese." Ike commented. "I'll get you some cottage cheese along the way," Banunuh said, as he left the room. "Considering if the author is nice to me, I should be back by seven," Banunuh said, as he left._

-END FLASHBACK-

"Ew…aw man, that is sick! Peach definitely has no shame in her game," Princess Daisy commented as she shook her head at her best friend's foul behavior. Banunuh nodded in agreement. "Not used to her doing that…" Banunuh commented. "I am. She does it around me, like, way too much!" Daisy exclaimed as she folded her arms. "Wow…that's not very ladylike…" Banunuh said. "Tell me about it. I mean, I don't mind it that much, but THIS much? Just no!" Daisy exclaimed, as she shook her head in disgust. "I tried to get her to consult her doctor about it, but she freaks out every time I suggest it," Daisy said. So they continued with their tracks, when suddenly they both got this sensation of déjà vu. "Hey, Banoonoo, doesn't this area look familiar?" Daisy asked Banunuh, who was having a hard time carrying her on his back. "Hm…now that you mention it, this area does look familiar," Banunuh said, looking around the never-ending green forest. Daisy gasped, as she placed her hands up to her face. "Banana, I do believe we've went in a gigantic circle!" Daisy exclaimed as she threw her hands out to express herself. Banunuh slapped himself, sighing in disbelief. "Crab it! You're right, my fairest!" Banunuh exclaimed, shaking his head in disbelief. "Well, now what? Which way do we go now?" Daisy asked Banunuh as she leaned over on her back with her arms folded behind her head. There were several paths covered in leaves and twigs and such. Banunuh placed his hand over his eyes as he squinted in the northeast direction. "Let's try this path," said Banunuh. As they walked in that direction, they then heard ferocious growls and grunts, with Banunuh and Daisy gasping in fear simultaneously. "Or…maybe we could go in that direction," Daisy suggested as she pointed to the left of them. They heard a wolf howl from that direction, as they then stepped away from the path. Daisy sighed. "Are we at a loss? Do our lives end here?" Banunuh commented. "Never give up! We have to keep trying!" Daisy exclaimed courageously, as Banunuh was feeling sheepish. "I dunno, princess…maybe we should call for help, or something." Banunuh said. Daisy folded her arms and pouted as she puffed up her cheeks. "No heck we ain't! We're gonna find our way outta here like we're feral children!" Daisy exclaimed as she fist-pumped. She then leaned forward on him, her face hanging over to meet his. "Hey!" she exclaimed as she patted his back with both hands. "Come on! Let's get moving!" she said with enthusiasm. "But I'm so tired…" Banunuh said as he slumped over on the ground. Daisy then placed her hands on her hips. "Fine then! If you won't go, then I'll go myself!" Daisy exclaimed as she hopped off of his back. "Where are you going?" Banunuh asked the tomboyish princess. "I'm getting the crabbage outta here!" Daisy said to him. "But you'll get eaten!" Banunuh said. "Get eaten my foot! I'm not going to be eaten!" Daisy exclaimed, as she ran in the northeast direction. Banunuh gasped, as he sat up. "But wait, milady! That's the direction the growling was coming from!" he shouted. He sighed as he shook his head. "This is her last Saturday. She's going to be eaten, and it's my entire fault," Banunuh said. "So maybe I should go and save her from being eaten, or maybe I just wallow here in my grief and guilt, and talk about what a horrible person I am," Banunuh said. Two mini versions of Banunuh appeared on his shoulders—one dressed as an angel, and the other one dressed as a demon. Banunuh gasped as he looked to his right shoulder, and to his left. "Banunuh, go save the princess! She is your fairest, after all!" the angel then shouted to him. "Nah, don't listen to 'em! Wallow away!" the demon said. "Well, if I wallow, I won't have to do anymore walking around…" Banunuh said, as he pondered the thought deeply. The angel then gasped. "You would never! Don't you know that the princess is relying on you?" he said. "Why? She clearly _isn't_ relying on me. I mean, she took off even after I tried to stop her." Banunuh commented. "See? That good-guy chump dudn't even thinks straight! The princess' gots her own back! Now wallow, kid!" Banunuh's bad self conscious said to himself. "Of course the princess is relying on you! She may be a tough, tomboyish princess on the outside, but in the inside, she's actually as dainty and feeble as Peach!" the angel said. "That's a lie! You're just tryin'a stop this guy from wallowin'!" the demon said. "Maybe I SHOULD save the princess. After all, she is pretty hot," Banunuh said. "Yes! She is as hot as fire! Go with your heart, Banunuh!" the angel said. "Okay!" Banunuh exclaimed, as he fell to the ground on his back. "I'm such a horrible person!" Banunuh wailed as he cried, wallowing in his own guilt and grief. "Yeah! I knew it!" the demon said. The angel gasped. "Oh no! Now that you've gone with this decision, the princess is sure to be swallowed by the harsh forces of Mother Nature!" the angel cried. "I'm such a horrible person! Wahaha ha!" Banunuh cried. The demon and angel then disappeared from his shoulders, with the angel shaking his head in disbelief, and the demon cackling. While Banunuh was wallowing, a loud, blood-curdling scream was heard, as Banunuh gasped. "Oh no!" Banunuh cried. "My fairest is about to be eaten!" he exclaimed. He facepalmed, as he shook his head in grief. "This is my entire fault. I should've listened to the angel…" Banunuh said. The scream was heard once more, as Banunuh jumped to his feet. "Wait! There's still hope! I've got to save her!" Banunuh yelled, as he then dashed off towards the northeast direction. "Princess!" he shouted, with his hands cupped over his mouth. "Princess!" he shouted once more, with no reply. "I must keep trying!" Banunuh exclaimed. He was making his way through the forest, as he heard another yell. "Help!" the voice cried. Banunuh gasped. "Princess?!" he shouted. "Princess, is that you?" he yelled. "Get me outta here!" the voice cried. "Princess!" he yelled once more. "Yeah, it's me! Come help me!" she yelled. "Hurry up!" "Where are you?!" Banunuh yelled. "Over here!" she yelled. "Over where?" he yelled back. "Keep looking!" she yelled. Banunuh kept looking around, as he was starting to give up hope. Suddenly, he gasped as he tripped over something. "Hey hey hey watch it!" Daisy yelled. Banunuh gasped as he looked back, to see Princess Daisy all tangled up in vines and roots. "Princess!" he exclaimed. "Yeah yeah yeah, all right! Just get me outta here! I think this forest is trying to swallow me up!" Princess Daisy exclaimed, as the tight vines and roots were starting to wrap around her entirely. The vines then wrapped around Daisy's mouth, as she screamed, her cries being muffled by the vines. "PRINCESS!" Banunuh yelled frantically. "Don't worry! I got this! I got this I got this I got this," he assured himself. He then pulled out his machete, with Daisy screaming even more. "Relax, I'm not gonna hurt you with this!" Banunuh told Daisy. He then carefully sliced up the vines, which sprayed out a green substance when cut. "Ew," Banunuh said as he stuck his tongue out in disgust. He then began to cut up all the vines, and soon he freed Daisy from the vines. "Now let's get outta here!" Banunuh exclaimed. "I'm right with ya!" Daisy exclaimed as she ran with Banunuh. Little did she know, her hair was tied up to a tree branch. "Ow!" Daisy exclaimed as she was yanked back, as she fell on the ground. "Princess?!" Banunuh said frantically, turning to see Daisy on the ground. "What's wrong?!" he asked her. "My hair is connected to the tree!" she exclaimed. To their surprise, all of the roots and vines that Banunuh had previously sliced up started to grow back very quickly. "We have no choice, milady! We have to cut your hair!" Banunuh exclaimed. Daisy gasped. "My…my hair!" Daisy exclaimed. "If we don't hurry up and do it, we'll be eaten alive!" Banunuh said. "Oh…alright, then! But make sure you don't cut it too short!" Princess Daisy exclaimed. And so Banunuh pulled out his machete, effectively cutting off Daisy's hair. She was happy that she was free, but to her dismay, her hair was shoulder-length as usual. "Well…it was fun while it lasted," Daisy commented as she sighed. And the roots and vines where growing back very quickly. Banunuh then grabbed Daisy up, as they were both yelling and screaming, as they were running from the vines. Eventually, they were far away from that area. "I think we're safe now," Banunuh said. "You can put me down now," Daisy said. "Oh," Banunuh replied as he put her down. "Oh, what I wouldn't give to have long, silky hair again," Daisy said, as she sighed. Suddenly, she was wrapped in a bright, luminescent light again, and when the light vanished, she had long, silky, flowing hair, tied up in a ponytail, and she was sparkling clean. "Wow! The author totally loves me!" Daisy exclaimed gleefully, with Banunuh's jaw dropping on the forest floor. "Okay, please tell me my jaw did NOT just touch this ground," Banunuh commented. "Oh!" Daisy gasped as she looked at her feet, only to notice that she was wearing flower-print sandals. "Great galloping grasshoppers! The author was kind enough to give me sandals! Sweet!" Daisy exclaimed. Banunuh and Daisy were walking through the forest, as there were butterflies and ladybugs, and even honeybees swarming around Daisy. And they were hopping rabbits next to her, and monkeys swinging off vines close to her, and a squirrel on top of her head. There was even a snake wrapped around her neck, and a bird on her right shoulder. "Boy, nature sure does love me today," Daisy commented. "Look at all the free bananas you have… Don't all of these creatures annoy you?" Banunuh asked the peppy princess, who was giggling. "Nope! Not a bit!" Daisy exclaimed cheerfully. As they were walking, they came across a cliff in their way. Daisy gasped. "Oh no! What do we do from here?" Daisy asked Banunuh, who was tugging on a vine, making sure that it was sturdy. "I hope you know how to swing on vines, milady!" Banunuh exclaimed as he then leaped on the vines. "Okay! I'll try!" she said as she shrugged. She leaped up to the vines, as she began to swing with Banunuh. "Woohoo! This is awesome!" Daisy exclaimed, showing that she was full of energy. Banunuh and Daisy continued to swing off trees and vines. Banunuh made his way across, and landed on the other side. As Daisy was about to make her way across, she slipped up and missed the next vine, as she screamed, falling into the void. Banunuh screamed to the top of his lungs, "OH MY GOD!" Suddenly, Daisy was brought back up by a whole bunch of butterflies, as they carried her back to the cliff. "Wow!" Daisy exclaimed. "Thank you, butterflies!" she exclaimed. Banunuh's jaw dropped once again. "H-how? How?!" he exclaimed, as he was completely flabbergasted. "I never thought I'd be so lucky!" Daisy said. "Let's keep moving, milady! We have to find our way out of here," he commented. "Yeah! Let's go!" she exclaimed with enthusiasm, as she took off really fast. Banunuh was having a hard time keeping up with the tomboyish princess, as he was trailing a ways behind her. "You sure are fast, aren't you?" Banunuh said, as he was panting. "Yup, I sure am!" she chimed joyfully. As they were running through the forest, they heard someone say, "Doughnuts! Getcha free doughnuts!" Daisy then gasped as she jumped up in excitement. "Doughnuts? I love doughnuts!" she squealed gleefully, to run up to the person in the forest set up with a doughnut stand. "Doughnuts in the middle of the forest…? What?!" Banunuh exclaimed, shaking his head in confusion. "I'll take three, please!" Daisy said to the person. Falco Lombardi then gave her three doughnuts. "I'll make it a three dozen just for you, sweetcheeks," Falco said flirtatiously to Daisy. "Wow, thanks!" Daisy said, as she began to munch on the savory, sweet doughnuts. "Hey, don't I recognize you?" Banunuh said to Falco. Falco placed his left wing on his chin. "Now that you mention it, you do ring a bell," Falco replied. "Oh yeah! That's right, I ran into you earlier in here!" Banunuh exclaimed. "That's right, you stole my line!" Falco commented. "Falco Lombardi? What are you doing here?" Daisy commented as she finished off her third doughnut, as she belched loudly. "Who are you, and how do you know my name?" Falco asked Daisy. Daisy scoffed as she placed her hands on her hips. "What, don't you remember me? I'm Princess Daisy! You know, Peach's best friend? I visit the Super Smash Bros. mansion occasionally," she commented. Falco's jaw dropped. "B-but…how? How?! You look so…!" he exclaimed as he was totally shocked. "I know! I got a makeover!" Princess Daisy exclaimed as she stroked her silky smooth hair. "Anyhow, what brings you in here? You don't seem like too much of a world traveler," Daisy commented. "Hey! I resent that!" Falco stated as he folded his wings. "I'm here selling doughnuts to natives. You wouldn't believe how many customers I get here!" he exclaimed, as he pointed to his left at several monkeys, feral children and grizzly bears who just grabbed some doughnuts. "I've been making a killer profit!" Falco commented, counting invisible money. "Just a second, Falco. You said that you give away _free _doughnuts," Banunuh said. "And…? Your point?" Falco said. "Well, if you give away free doughnuts, you can't make a profit." Banunuh pointed out. Falco realized that he had nothing but ants crawling out of his cash register, as his eyes widened. "For the luvva dirt! You gotta be kiddin' me!" Falco exclaimed as he grabbed the sides of his head and looked up into the sky. "You mean to tell me I've been working out here for three weeks and haven't made zilch?! Man, I gotta start drivin' up these prices!" Falco said, as he shook his head. "Hey Falco, you wouldn't know how to get outta here, would you?" Banunuh asked him. "Keep going straight, and then you're outta this place!" he said. "Thanks, Falco!" Daisy exclaimed, as she then yanked a whole box of doughnuts off of the stand. "You're welcome!" Falco said, now realizing that Daisy took off with his doughnuts. "Hey!" he shouted, as Daisy ran off with the doughnuts, laughing frantically. Banunuh and Daisy were running as fast as they could, with their arms behind their backs, while laughing and smiling. The light kept getting closer and closer, until they came out of the Forest of Vast Pain and Suffering. "We made it!" Banunuh exclaimed, as he began to smooch the ground. Daisy nodded as she folded her arms. "I'm gonna miss this place," Daisy said. "Are you kidding?" Banunuh replied with a dull look on his face. Banunuh then look at the sign, to realize that it was facing in the opposite direction of the Forest of Vast Pain and Suffering. "Looks like they turned the sign the wrong way," Banunuh said. Plot twist! This was actually The Forest of Vast Pain and Suffering. "What?! That doesn't make any since! It's not even a forest!" Banunuh exclaimed. And so, the group of criminals then came back. "I thought we dealt with you already, punk," the leader said. Banunuh looked at Daisy. "Run, run run run run run!" he said to Daisy. They both took off running, as they were being chased by criminals, random dudes, bees, crows, psycho ice cream trucks and bulldogs. They were picking up as fast as they could, while screaming and hollering. Soon, after a while of running, The House of the Dreaded Cousins (?) came into view, as they were running as fast as they could.

"Checkmate," Pink Gold Peach commented smugly with her hands on her hips, as Malaraia threw her hands in the air. "DAWH!" Malaria screamed as she picked up the chessboard and broke it over her right knee. "I can't stand THIS GOT DANG GAME!" Malaria yelled as she facepalmed with both hands. "You just can't stand to lose. Sore loser!" Pink Gold Peach replied mockingly as she stuck her tongue out, with Malaria's face turning red. "I am NOT A SORE LOSER! I just have ANGER MANAGEMENT ISSUES! That's why I talk by first using lowercase AND THEN GO INTO HIGHER CASE AND THEN YELL! YEEP!" Malaria yelled, with Pink Gold Peach laughing. "This ain't funny; I said THIS AIN'T FUNNY!" Malaria yelled. "It actually kinda is," Princess Peach said, as she began to chuckle. "It's because you're screaming like you're a feral child," Althaia remarked. Suddenly, Banunuh and Princess Daisy burst through the front door, locking it and breathing very hard. "That…was the scariest… moment…of my life…" Banunuh said, as he slid down the door, falling on his back. "Holy Dolan, is that you, Banunuh?!" Malaria exclaimed as she ran up to Banunuh. "I just had the wackiest adventure of my life," Banunuh said, as he sat up groggily. "Hey, I'm back!" Princess Daisy commented gleefully. "Daisy! I'm so glad you're back!" Malaria exclaimed, as she hugged the princess. Baby Daisy just placed her hands on her hips. "Great, I was having fun being the only Daisy!" Baby Daisy exclaimed, as she folded her arms. "Oh whoa, EW! What is that awful smell?!" Daisy exclaimed as she wafted the stench away from her nose. Everyone pointed at Peach, who was still farting up a storm. "You know I cannot STAND that," Daisy said. "I get so fed up with this, I tell you! Really! I gotta make this room smell good! STAT!" Daisy exclaimed, as she then shot out a burst of all sorts of flowers, making the room smell lovely. "Thank you, Daisy. I would have suffocated if I had to put up with that any longer," Rosalina said to Daisy. "Hey Banunuh, where's my cottage cheese?" Ike said. Banunuh facepalmed. "Oh man, I totally forgot! Sorry man!" Banunuh exclaimed. "You know what happens when I don't get my cottage cheese, right? I get mad... So mad…" Ike said as he slowly approached Banunuh with his sword Ragnell emitting flames, approaching Banunuh. "GREAT," Ike exclaimed as he then slashed Banunuh into the air. "AETHER!" he exclaimed. Before he had a chance to totally destroy Banunuh, a jar of gift wrapped cottage cheese fell into his arms, as he stopped his Final Smash, letting Banunuh retreat. "Oh, yay! The authors love me!" Ike exclaimed, as he opened the jar of cottage cheese, devouring it. "GET ME OUT OF THIS CHAPTER!" Baby Rosalina said randomly, with everyone staring at her. "Find the plothole," Samyatang said. "First of all, oases usually don't drain, they dry up. And it just so happened that this oasis drained when Daisy got in it, and on top of that, she ended up in the same place Banunuh was, just so they could share one adventure to get back home." Baby Peach said. "That'll work. O hummye bunny pencak silat lotsa coco. BADA BACON!" Samyatang exclaimed, as they were all sucked into the plothole.

Kawaii-Pinkberry: Woo hoo! That was another chapter of TMOMAA: TSV! I hope you guys enjoyed it, because I enjoyed writing it. That's so much inspiration put into this chapter, so it might take a long minute for the next chapter to be made, so bear with me! Well, that's it. I'm totally tired after this one. Read and review, please! And stay tuned for the next chapter of The Misadventures of Malaria and Althaia: The Smashers Visit! And let's give it up for Duke L. Deuce!

Everyone: *claps for Duke L. Deuce*

Kawaii-Pinkberry: Well, that's it for today! By the way, this chapter is 20 pages long xD


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